Negative Thinking, Therapy Q&A , Breathing Tips, Chaos

Depression and Anxiety puts a negative spin on everything, including the way you see yourself and the way you experience the world around you. Elements of this distorted state of being include:

Catastrophizing: You tend to make a molehill into a mountain. Contemplating the worst possible scenarios, increases your stress and anxiety.

Overgeneralizing: Viewing a negative event as part of an endless pattern of lifelong mistakes.

All-or-nothing thinking: This is the tendency to look at things in extreme, black-and-white terms. Most of life happens in the gray area.

Assuming or mind-reading: Believing you know something to be true when in fact it may not be the truth at all.

Someone who has confidence and believes that she/ he can achieve something in life will most likely become successful. Consider the following, when working toward change:

Replace negatives with positives
Indulging in activities that you enjoy or that make your laugh
Spend time with positive people
Successes/ Wins take seriously, Losses are something from which to learn.
Feeling loss consume your mind, try to think of those situations where success/ wins were all yours.
Catch yourself before your negative thinking gets out of control.

Negative Thinking & Physical Health
Researchers at the University of Kentucky found that patients who had negative thinking patterns, such as thoughts about not being able to justify their own existence, were at higher risk for developing depression. Heart patients with depression have been shown to have more complications, including a higher risk of death.

Nope

This is often how people envision therapy sessions. In my opinion, this is Old School and more often associated with the type of psychoanalytical therapy that Sigmond Freud performed, over the course of many many years.



Why did it take him so long to help clients and not you?

Here, the therapeutic approach is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
Freud used a psychoanalytical approach that had individuals start with the beginning of their lives. Instead, CBT may take a "snapshot' of the past but focuses more on the "now and your future",
on your "patterns" and how to change them.

Keep in mind, many therapists offices today do have a couch for comfortable seating, you don't have to lay down, most clients sit upright. Of course you are allowed to lay down if it is more comfortable for you

No, this is an old but back then common misconception

Everyday people often benefit hugely from therapy - If something in your life makes you feel like you are going crazy this would be an ideal time to make an appointment and explore what might be helpful.

How do you define crazy?

That is open to interpretation, "out of touch with reality", like believing in one's own abilities to fly is what comes to some peoples minds. Yet, there are a variety of ways someone can end up in this state of mind and they are not necessarily forever deemed crazy. More like having a crazy, detached from reality moment in time. Chemical imbalances may come into play here.

Individuals often wonder if they would do better with a male or female therapist. Research on therapist traits and therapy outcome has failed to identify any relationship between the two. Factors such as warmth and empathy are much more related to outcome than therapist gender.

However, the nature of your particular problem as well as your own preferences may lead you to seek out a male or female therapist. For example, a woman who was sexually abused by her father may feel more comfortable working with a woman therapist.

Can an individual and therapist have a relationship outside of therapy?

No. Therapy is a one-way street. The therapist knows a great deal about the patient but the patient does not know intimate details about the therapist. Because of this, the therapist often seems to have a greater power or influence over the individual, which could result in abuse or deception.

This does not mean that one cannot have any contact with the therapist outside of the therapy situation. This is especially true in small towns where social contact may be inevitable. However, it is generally not a good idea to seek therapy from someone you know personally or with whom you may have another relationship (e.g., business interest, friendship). In fact, the ethics of most professions prohibit their members from engaging in these types of relationships.

Is it okay for therapists and patients to date?

Dating or any sexual contact between a therapist and patient is inappropriate. This includes seeking therapy from someone with whom you have been involved, with whom you had an intimate relationship with in the past, dating during therapy or starting a relationship after therapy has ended. Many states have specific statutes regarding this behavior.

Does therapy involve physical touch?

The use of touch varies. Some therapists may pat or hug a patient as a sign of support or comfort. However, physical touch is powerful and should never be sexualized. Kissing, excessive touching and sexual activity have no place in therapy. While almost all therapists are ethical, a small minority exploits their patients. Any therapy involving inappropriate sexual behavior should be discontinued and the therapist should be reported to the states ethics board.

Which is better, therapy or medication?

Both medication and therapy have been shown to be effective in treating mental illness. The type of treatment used depends on the nature of the problem. Generally, medication is often prescribed for conditions known to have strong biological components, such as major depression, schizophrenia, bipolar disorder or panic disorder.

Research suggests that use of medication and psychotherapy together may be the best approach, especially for more severe conditions. The medication offers relief from symptoms, and psychotherapy enables the individual to gain knowledge about her condition and how to handle it. This combined approach offers the fastest, longest-lasting treatment. This Is Your Choice

Will my therapist be angry if I switch to another practitioner?

The answer to this question should be no. Therapists are professionals who should have the best interest of their patient at heart. Any decision to switch therapists should be explored with the therapist. If your therapist gets touchy or angry at your decision, you can take comfort in the fact that you have made the right decision.

Absolutely, yes.

When you are willing to do the work.

A therapist is not there to "fix" you but help you to facilitate your own changes.

Whether you are an individual, a couple or a family these tips will help you get the best results from your therapeutic sessions.

Trust - You need to feel heard and trust that your therapist is there to help you.
Understanding - If you have a question about what you are hearing, ask questions
Notebook - I always suggest bringing a note pad or notebook to each session
Write It Down - New coping strategies, tools and concepts are worth keeping!
Homework - Any homework assignment is worth doing, it is for you, not your therapist

It is important to acknowledge that stress is not nearly as critical as how it is dealt with. Here are some suggestions for positive coping methods:

Noise: Noise & sounds can either ease or contribute to stress. For this reason, it is important to become aware of how noise affects you.

Light: Inadequate or artificial indoor lighting can cause stress that creates agitation, disorganized thinking, physical discomfort, and even disease. Sunlight can reduce stress levels.

Physical Activity: Physical activities like walking, hiking, stretching, jogging, running, or riding a bicycle releases pent-up energy associated with stress levels. Just a few minutes of moving your body can be very effective for reducing stress levels.

Time Management: Learning how to manage one's time can reduce stress and make you feel more effective at reaching daily goals. Using a daily planner or a "to do" list can help.

Take A Break: Stop and find something else to do. Take a nap or decide to think about something different. A change of pace can enable one to find a new way to view a problem.

Delegate: Delegating tasks not only reduces stress and creates more time; it also promotes trust in relationships.

Personal Cues: When under stress, the heart beats faster, muscles tighten, breathing becomes shallower, and often nausea or headache will result. When symptoms of stress appear, stop and take a break.

Sleep: Getting enough sleep will enable one to better handle stress. Sleeping environment is important as well. Make sure that nothing interferes with peaceful sleep.

Laugh: Laughter is a great way to fight stress. Studies have shown that laughter causes a measurable decrease in stress and a measurable increase in the immune system. Laughter increases blood flow to the brain and at the same time endorphins are released into the body making one feel better.

Talk It Out: Stress can be reduced by talking it over with someone. Find someone who will listen without judgment and who will help find solutions. Seek out optimistic people because these people tend to have lower stress levels in their own lives.

Affirmations: Find some positive phrases that fit, learn them, and repeat them often. You can come to believe!

Saying No : Having too many responsibilities creates stress. Know your limitations and stay within them. Reduce those people pleasing tendencies.

Breathe : Stress promotes shallow, rapid breathing. This deprives the body of oxygen and further exacerbates stress. Consciously breathing slowly and deeply will help the body relax.

Chaos: A state of extreme disorder, emotional upheaval or confusion.

Is this an ongoing element of your life?

Among those raised in a chaotic environment many, if not most, tend to recreate that same feeling in adult life subconsciously. If you find it exhausting and want to stop the pattern, then starting here is best -

Ask yourself, What is your role in perpetuating the chaos in your life?

People keep it going, not because it feels good, but because it is familiar.

The next time you feel angry, stressed or anxious, pay attention to your breathing. You may notice your breaths become short and shallow when you experience negative emotions. While this is a normal response to stressful conditions, poor breathing actually compounds the negative effects stress has on the body.

On the other hand, practicing deep breathing exercises can help you recover from stress more quickly, which will improve the health of your mind and body.

I call this "Your Reset Button"

So, what exactly does deep breathing do for you?

Your muscles relax.

Your blood pressure lowers.
Endorphins are released.
Detoxification improves.
Oxygen delivery improves.

Time: 5-10 minutes

Inhale deeply, filling your lungs with air. Practice bringing the air into your abdomen, not just your chest. Count slowly to five as you inhale.

Exhale deeply, emptying your lungs completely. Counting slowly to five as you exhale and releasing tension from your muscles .

Continue to concentrate on your breathing and counting for several minutes.

Repeat at least once daily or when feeling tense.

It is gratitude. Giving thanks, appreciating others, acknowledging the wonderful things we have in our lives.

Gratitude is extremely powerful and can't be activated unless consciously practiced every day of our lives. It can turn a sour mood into a joyous one, make us laugh at our own silly shortcomings, and open our hearts up to increased appreciation of all that surrounds us. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure it out, it just takes willingness.

Do the following ritual acts daily for at least 30 days. After 30 days, you're free to discontinue and your misery will be gladly refunded."

805Therapy - Why that name?

I provide individual and therapeutic support groups in the Ventura County, CA area. 805 is the area code for Ventura County. It is also the name of my official website http://www.805Therapy.com, you are invited to stop by, anytime. Or you may phone (805) 204-7315, for an appointment.

There is no need to live locally in order to benefit from information posted and shared :)