Am I Depressed?
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How i Deal With My Depression updated 8th January 2012.
I am 61 years of age and i have suffered with depression on and off since i was twelve years of age,being a man it was difficult to talk about these problems,but as a youngster in the 1960s there wasn't much help available to a young child,and in fact my mother just thought i was a difficult child not realizing the problems.
Quite simply i was depressed,at that time there were not any self help programs available and in fact i didn't know what the problem was untill i was in my early twenties,when i visited a doctor and he prescribed valium.
So by the time i was twenty three years old i was addicted to valium. so this is how i coped and even though i still suffer from depression i know how to manage the symptoms,and by you reading my pages i hope to help in some way.even if you're looking to help youirself or someone close to you Most of this is written adlib i dont put these things on to word docs and spell check, so please excuse some spelling mistakes, i just add as i think about what to write about, i'm no pro., Take Care Ray.
Contents at a Glance
Depression and anger
Coping with your angry side
This to me is the most horrible side of depression, we get angry and say the most horrible things to our partners and children, but what is most upsetting is that when one of your children say "I know you don't mean it daddy/Mommy, its just that your sick and not well, But this just seams to make things worst.
It's very true that we say things we don't mean when were depressed
It's very true that we say things we don't mean when were depressed
Lets have a laugh Rich Vos - Anxiety and Depression
The side effects of prescribed medication Am i Depressed ?
I was suffering from depression and i was prescribed a drug to help me, but wow when i read the leaflet enclosed with the tablets i became almost suicidal, Bi polar and manic not to mention the other problems the leaflet said i might suffer from like.... lethargy,dizziness,tremors,vomiting,tiredness,confusion and feeling anxious, and on top of all this i won't be able to shag anymore simply because i'm depressed.. Yes i agree that these drugs are needed in many cases, as specially during the beginning of a depressed state however i feel that we tend to rely on these drugs too long for our own good.Please take a look at the video here, because i feel sure that then you will understand what i'm talking about. please click on the link below and enjoy.
Jokes.comRich Vos - Anxiety and Depressionhttp://comedians.jokes.com/rich-vos/videos/rich-vos---anxiety-and-depressionJokesJoke of the DayFunny Jokes
Jokes.comRich Vos - Anxiety and Depressionhttp://comedians.jokes.com/rich-vos/videos/rich-vos---anxiety-and-depressionJokesJoke of the DayFunny Jokes
Causes of Depression
What causes depression ?
Then there are the people who seem to have no worries emotionally or financially but still get hit by this devastating illness.
Here i can only talk about my own experiences from a very young age,when my parents divorced when i was eight years of age in 1958, at this time it was shamefull to have divorced parents and in many ways i felt somehow responsible for the breakup of my parents, so i know that this is when i started to suffer from this illness.
I often wonder with it being so easy to divorce these days how this truly effects the children of today.
to be added to
Start Talking To Yourself
Banish Nasty Thoughts
This is one of the oldest tricks in the book when it comes to getting rid of those negative thoughts, so try this simple test.
Find yourself a quiet place to sit down or lie
Close your eyes and try to empty your mind, this takes practice but in a short while you will succeed.
If a negative thought comes in to your mind,simply say to it "go away negative thought i will deal with you later"
Now try to imagine yourself in your favorite quiet place maybe feeling the sun on your face or back
Now start to say nice things to yourself about yourself like " I am a good person " I am a nice person " " I have a positive mental attitude" remembering to tell nasty thoughts to go away as they appear.
Besides this simple exercise you might find it helpful to put little notes around the house in strategic places where they will be seen with your self affirmations written on them,like " I am a positive person " and any others you can think of.
For the depressed person starting this exercise can be difficult because at times you will say something nice about yourself to yourself and that voice in your head automatically seems to answer with a negative response like "no your not " this is where the battle begins, and it takes practice, but i promise you will succeed with practice, just keep telling that negative thought to go away using your own choice of words.
Here starting is the main challenge, and each time you start this will get easier and easier, give yourself a pat on the back for starting and a small reward for each successfull session, the more sessions you complete the better you'll become at this.
Find yourself a quiet place to sit down or lie
Close your eyes and try to empty your mind, this takes practice but in a short while you will succeed.
If a negative thought comes in to your mind,simply say to it "go away negative thought i will deal with you later"
Now try to imagine yourself in your favorite quiet place maybe feeling the sun on your face or back
Now start to say nice things to yourself about yourself like " I am a good person " I am a nice person " " I have a positive mental attitude" remembering to tell nasty thoughts to go away as they appear.
Besides this simple exercise you might find it helpful to put little notes around the house in strategic places where they will be seen with your self affirmations written on them,like " I am a positive person " and any others you can think of.
For the depressed person starting this exercise can be difficult because at times you will say something nice about yourself to yourself and that voice in your head automatically seems to answer with a negative response like "no your not " this is where the battle begins, and it takes practice, but i promise you will succeed with practice, just keep telling that negative thought to go away using your own choice of words.
Here starting is the main challenge, and each time you start this will get easier and easier, give yourself a pat on the back for starting and a small reward for each successfull session, the more sessions you complete the better you'll become at this.
Lets Have A Laugh,something to cheer you up.
Some Funny Pictures and jokes
-Two cows are grazing in a field. One says,"Aren't you worried about that mad cow disease?" the other replies "not me im a squirrel".
-Two birds flying over Cape Kennedy and a rocket flew past them.
one bird said to the other "hey that birds flying fast" and the other bird said "so would you if your arse was on fire"
-I asked my girlfriend to tell me something that would make me happy and sad at the same time. She said I've got a bigger dick than my dad.
-A young boy dressed as long John Silver at a fancy dress party that was being judged to find the best fancy dressed person
The judge said to the boy "well now who are you ?" the boy replied "i'm Long John Silver" and the judge said " so where are your buckineers ?"
the boy replied "under my buckin hat sir"
-A man went to a super market and bought one apple, one cabbage,one carrot, one piece of chicken and one potatoe, The lady at the check out said "would you be a single gentleman by any chance sir ?" the man replied " yes but why do you ask ? the lady replied "because you're an ugly b,,,,,d.
-How do you know if an elephant has been in your fridge, easy footprints in your butter.
Depression and Motivation
Get Motivated
Set yourself some dreams and goals and write them down,remembering that goals are only dreams written down and visa versa.
Christmas Not My Best Time Of The Year
Depressed
Firstly many thanks for your messages of support, and some have asked me to write about what triggered my depression.Well on Christmas eve 1958 my mother walked out on us so i woke in the morning to find she had left and the rest of that Christmas day wasn't one that i would want to remember, but how could i forget and every Christmas day since memories of that day have been in the back of my mind, and just impossible to block out.
She had her reasons, one was that my dad had been drinking, but my dad didn't drink, just this once he went for a Christmas drink with his work mates and that was enough to cause a divorce.
While there must have been other underlying factors she never ever spoke about them, but inside i never forgave her for doing that and on that particular day.
I have now forgiven her because i realised that i wouldnt be able to move on until i did.
One Big Cause of my Depression as a Youngster
Horrible Step Farther and Child Abuser
He came to the house as a handy man to do some work, and he never left well it seems that way.
I became very afraid of him, besides the abuse he used to beat me when mother was out but very cleverly no visible marks, i was ten years old when this started.
I had a yoiung girl friend called Carol about the same age, she had called round to go out and play but i was out, but when i got home she was there,,with him, i dare not tell mum because of what he might do to me so i said nothing.but i became very sad depressed and afraid almost a nervous wreck.
The very last straw in this episode came when i got out of bed and saw a wedding cake on the table, i burst out crying i was totally beside myself begging mum not to do it, he wasn't home at the time, but she went ahead and married him and the abuse of me continued for many years, I finally plucked up courage to say something to my mother when i was sixteen and very sad,worried and depressed, my mother didn't believe me, my step father hit me across the face knocking me over by the fire place, I picked up the poker from the fire place and brought it dow on his head as hard as i could knocking him out cold and bleeding heavilly,I just shouted i hope you die you b.....d.
I left home that night at around midnight never to sleep under the same roof as my mother again, i slept on a park bench and hitch hiked to Edinburgh the next day,after sleeping in Princess Street gardens for a few nights i found work in a hotel in Edinburgh as a commis chef living in.
Now i was entering some of the happiest years of my life,. I got a phone call from my mother one day saying he had left and i can come home, well can you guess what i said LOL, i was disgusted to find out that she had used me for grounds to divorce him.
Rejection is a major cause of depression in someones life, i didn't know it then but i know it now, so i will write more on rejection soon.
Are you depressed or unhappy ?
Many people feel just a bit down and believe that they are depressed,when in fact the truth is that they are just unhappy or sad, these days doctors seem all to ready to hand out prescription drugs that can have horrible side effects making matters worse,.You can do a very simple test by drawing a line down the middle of a piece of paper, at the top on the left simply write reasons to be happy,and list all the good things in your life, and on the right all the bad. you can then begin to work out what you have to be unhappy about and happy about. This is just a very simple test The Man who thinks He Can
Anonymous
I found this poem many years ago in a book about selling it was marked Anon
so i really dont know who wrote it,but it helped me a lot, If you read between the lines you can see that it applies to any one in any situation,so i hope it helps.
If you think you are beaten, you are;
If you think you dare not, you don't.
If you'd like to win, but think you can't
It's almost a cinch you won't.
If you think you'll lose, you've lost.
For out in the world we find
Success begins with a fellow's will:
It's all in his state of mind.
If you think you're outclassed, you are:
You've got to think high to rise,
You've got to be sure of yourself before
You'll ever win that prize.
Life's battles don't always go
To the stronger or faster man,
But sooner or later the man who wins
Is the one who thinks he can.
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Some signs of depression
Crying for no apperant reason,
sweating
not sleeping
loss of sex drive,
angry,
sleeping to much
over eating
not eating
no motivation
can't be bothered to wash
eating junk food because your to lazy to cook.
stressed
problems concentrating
don't want to socialise
you don't find anything funny,
How to cope with Depression
How to cope with the depression
As a person who has suffered from depression for almost fifty years i certainly hope that i can tell you my story on how i have coped with my depressed state,i have read many books and never stop reading because i never found the help of the so called profesionals helpful at all,
The truth is that you can use and read a book when you want and use the imformation now,or during your sleepless night, but you might struggle to make that appointment with a doctor.
The truth is that you can use and read a book when you want and use the imformation now,or during your sleepless night, but you might struggle to make that appointment with a doctor.
Treating depression
Treating your own depression
So we've seen the doctor and were on the tablets and yes it can take months for the drugs to work, but what can we do to help ourselves to get motivated and start getting better,well there are thousands of books,videos available as you probably already know, so the first step to getting well is truly in your hands so lets try something simple to start against being depressed.
Self Affirmations
This is simple and it works,it is my number one favourite for treating your own depression,Treating depression actually becomes a lifestyle and needs to be worked on in some way probably for the rest of your life,
So self affirmations are simply telling yourself the following "i am a good person" "i am a nice person" " i have a possitive mental attitude"
" i am nice to be with " these are just a few, you can write some of your own and put them on post it notes through out the house as a constant reminder. Its important to keep saying these things to yourself throughout the day, and when you get a negative thought you simply say "piss off negative thought i'll deal with you later"
I will write much more on this later, you can treat depression your self along side the help of your medical practisioner i am not advising you to do this without medical help,or to stop taking medication if your on it
Ray
Self Affirmations
This is simple and it works,it is my number one favourite for treating your own depression,Treating depression actually becomes a lifestyle and needs to be worked on in some way probably for the rest of your life,
So self affirmations are simply telling yourself the following "i am a good person" "i am a nice person" " i have a possitive mental attitude"
" i am nice to be with " these are just a few, you can write some of your own and put them on post it notes through out the house as a constant reminder. Its important to keep saying these things to yourself throughout the day, and when you get a negative thought you simply say "piss off negative thought i'll deal with you later"
I will write much more on this later, you can treat depression your self along side the help of your medical practisioner i am not advising you to do this without medical help,or to stop taking medication if your on it
Ray
Are You Depressed ? Some of My Story,From the Heart
Get a grip of yourself,smell the roses,they told me.
Get a Grip, I had this said to me so many times during a very serious period of clinical depresion in the mid 1990s,I remember going in to a pub and a person who i thought was a friend said to me "would you like a beer?" i said yes please,and he said "I will only buy it if you promise not to cry in it". This was my next door neighbour someone i thought i could trust, in fact he was a disabled man i took to football matches and looked after like he was my father. When he said this to me in the pub i got a lump in my throat and walked out with my confidence shattered.
He knew about my tears because on certain days he could hear me sobbing through the walls when i was loanly desperate and suicidal.
My doctor at the time didn't seem to know how to handle depression,or how to treat depressed people,he only seemed to be interested in drug addicts,and he nearly turned me in to one by prescribing valium,but i refused to take it and asked to be refered to the dreaded mental health doctor at the hospital, i visited him for one hour every week for eight weeks, we talked about everything,my childhood,my teens,my twenties,thirties,fourties up to 47 the age i was then,And guess what he said "YOUR SUFFERING FROM DEPRESSION" its like he shouted it out as if it was a suprise.
Are you depressed ? can you relate to any of this ? Am i depressed ? yes but constantly fighting it. I was admitted to hospital this year May 4th 2011 with clinical depression, my wife was so ashamed about me being on that ward in that hospital so much so that she phoned the hospital to tell them that she was no longer wanted to be my next of kin, fine by me because it was obvious that i was very unhappy within the relationship anyway and i wanted out,so i gave her all the grounds she needed for a divorce,and it was all over in four months.,
Depression is a devastating illness and it has killed three marriages for me totalling almost twenty five years of my life,not to mention the numerous relationships in between of how many i don't want to even think about,but i feel that these ladies that once loved me probably now hate me,because they didn't know about,or understand my problems, but the truth is that i didn't understand me.
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TheCureForYouthMinistry Dec 23, 2011 @ 10:32 am | delete
- I have gone through bouts of depression, but hallelujah for prayer and medication LOL.
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jackoboy
Dec 23, 2011 @ 10:54 am | delete
- prayer really helps with coping through depression, i remember a book by Dr Norman Vincent Peele called the power of positive thinking, it went well with the medication
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jackoboy
Dec 23, 2011 @ 10:54 am | delete
- prayer really helps with coping through depression, i remember a book by Dr Norman Vincent Peele called the power of positive thinking, it went well with the medication
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Ladymermaid
Dec 15, 2011 @ 5:14 pm | delete
- Depression around the holidays is a very real issue. I suppose it is on my mind because it is once again the holiday season and as I walk through the mall I am surprised at how many lonely people there are out there. You can tell by how they look at you as you encounter them. I hope that this holiday season will find you in good spirits and not too depressed at all. The best of seasonal wishes.
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jackoboy
Dec 19, 2011 @ 3:31 am | delete
- Hi again
Thanks for your note,I have travelled from the Uk to Romania to spend Christmas with my new girlfriend so this Christmas should be a happy one.All the best to you, hope you have a nice time.
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kathysart
Nov 30, 2011 @ 6:46 pm | delete
- Ohhh and oh my.. thank you for sharing this
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jackoboy
Dec 19, 2011 @ 3:33 am | delete
- Thanks for your feedback
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totalhealth Nov 29, 2011 @ 1:50 pm | delete
- thanks for sharing your story, other people who are experiencing emotional problems may find this lens helpful to them.
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jackoboy
Dec 19, 2011 @ 3:37 am | delete
- Thanks for your feedback
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ashroc
Nov 29, 2011 @ 6:02 am | delete
- Thanks for sharing your story
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jackoboy
Dec 29, 2011 @ 2:44 am | delete
- thanks for commenting
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HERBMASTER
Nov 29, 2011 @ 12:00 am | delete
- Good site for guiding people through their own process of depression. The word needs to get out about this! Here's a little piece/peace to! raise your spirits!
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jackoboy
Dec 19, 2011 @ 4:08 am | delete
- Thanks for your compliment and feedback
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niceman91
Nov 27, 2011 @ 9:39 pm | delete
- I aggree chemical inbalance in the brain cause the depression, but environmental factors like having divorced parents when we are still kid can be the main cause if not treated early.I've seen kids with depression having same problems like yours in my practical year
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jackoboy
Dec 29, 2011 @ 2:45 am | delete
- thanks for your kind words and feedback
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infotechblog
Nov 27, 2011 @ 1:53 pm | delete
- A new study from Canadian researchers say that people who experience painful migraine headaches may be at high risk for developing clinical depression.
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Iain84
Nov 27, 2011 @ 8:34 am | delete
- Great lens thanks for sharing this. I'd always recommend exercise for beating depression as it's great for helping your sleep patterns and makes you feel great about yourself. You don't need to spend hours every day - you can just got for a short stroll every day and you'll see the difference.
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jackoboy
Dec 29, 2011 @ 2:47 am | delete
- thanks for your kind words and good ideas
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Iain84
Nov 27, 2011 @ 8:19 am | delete
- Hi Ray - great lens. My top tip for coping with depression is lots of exercise! It takes your mind off things, helps you concentrate and makes you feel great afterwards!
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wolfie10
Nov 24, 2011 @ 9:36 pm | delete
- my partner suffers from depression and i try to help her as much as i can. sometimes it is not easy.
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Some things my School Teachers Said and did
dealing with depression.
There were some very nasty teachers at three of the schools i went to during my school years.Here are some of the comments made by some of them to myself or my mother
St Roberts, Longsite Manchester,( Mrs Crawford ) If your son has a brain we'll need to open the top of his head and search for it. I was 6yrs old.
St Josephs Heywood Lancs, I wrote a poem about a swan for some English home work ( Mr Owen ) "did you write this poem ?" Yes Sir ("Liar")
Rochdale Art School to my mother ( " i've never seen someone so young and gifted ") I Was12 yrs old and enrolled into Art School on Saturday mornings.
St Josephs again same teacher Mr Owen " did any one see so and so on tv last night ?") not you Jackson i know your mother can't afford one.
We moved to Scotland when i was 14 yrs old
Mr Cameron English teacher, I wrote an autobiography of a shirt for English home work, He called me a liar in front of the whole class and gave me six of the belt for including for following joke in my work.
A shirt and a night dress were on the washing line, The shirt was complaining about his owners sweaty body, and the night dress said " shut up, i've been up all night".
Art teacher in Scotland St Martins Trannent reprt to my mother, " to confident"
St Roberts, Longsite Manchester,( Mrs Crawford ) If your son has a brain we'll need to open the top of his head and search for it. I was 6yrs old.
St Josephs Heywood Lancs, I wrote a poem about a swan for some English home work ( Mr Owen ) "did you write this poem ?" Yes Sir ("Liar")
Rochdale Art School to my mother ( " i've never seen someone so young and gifted ") I Was12 yrs old and enrolled into Art School on Saturday mornings.
St Josephs again same teacher Mr Owen " did any one see so and so on tv last night ?") not you Jackson i know your mother can't afford one.
We moved to Scotland when i was 14 yrs old
Mr Cameron English teacher, I wrote an autobiography of a shirt for English home work, He called me a liar in front of the whole class and gave me six of the belt for including for following joke in my work.
A shirt and a night dress were on the washing line, The shirt was complaining about his owners sweaty body, and the night dress said " shut up, i've been up all night".
Art teacher in Scotland St Martins Trannent reprt to my mother, " to confident"
Reasons to get motivated
God gave me a reason to live
In the book was a story of a salesman who was desperate and depressed, his depression had lasted many years, he had read many books on the causes of depression,and how to cope with his depressive situation, so now was the time for action, he had started work as a commision only salesman,meaning that he had to sell to earn a living.
On reading Dr Normans book he decided to follow each paragraph to the letter, so before leaving the house booted and suited he stood in front of the mirror and said " God i'm going out to sell today,please help me " and yes he became the top sales man in his company in a short time.How did this happen ? well firstly he truly believed that God could help, but here's the other thing, I did exactly the same thing and it worked.
You might be able to understand that i took on these commision only jobs myself because i could do the work when i was capable,because of my depression problems, I set goals relating to me depressed state of mind realizing what i could achieve in small steps,and with the help of God my higher power, trust me it works, good luck Ray
by jackoboy
Hi my name is Ray and i live in sunny Blackpool,UK
I will write lots in the comming months about my battle with depression from a very early age,i re...
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