Ask any married couple and you're bound to hear this typical scenario: "How could he not know I was upset? Every motion I made for three days indicated anger!" Yet, somehow, this poor fool missed the signs his wife was sending; probably because he wasn't paying much attention.
Don't make the same mistake. Become a body language expert. Learn to read the body signals the people around you are sending. Then you won't be caught off guard when your secretary quits in a fit of anger; your boss offers you a promotion; the girl at the bar hands you her number; or any number of other things happen. If you read the signs correctly, you will be ready for whatever comes next. Here are a few simple tips to reading others body language signals:
Pay Attention. Don't get so wrapped up in yourself that you fail to take notice of the things (and people) around you. Take some time each day to watch the people in your lives to see what gesture signals they are displaying as to their mood and attitudes. You may be surprised at what you discover.
# Evaluate All of Their Gestures. Don't just watch someone for a minute or two and think you know what's going on inside their head -- you don't! Correctly reading their body language requires taking all of their gestures into account including their posture; positioning; facial expressions; tone of voice and more.
# Look for Contradictions. People are contradictory by nature, so it isn't unusual to hear someone say one thing, but act another. Unsure if your teenager is telling you the truth about their history grade? Watch for less subtle signs of deceit including moving or dilated eyes; a swift touch of the mouth or nose; and change in posture or stance. These can all be signs contradicting what they're e saying is true.
# Look for Contradictions. People are contradictory by nature, so it isn't unusual to hear someone say one thing, but act another. Unsure if your teenager is telling you the truth about their history grade? Watch for less subtle signs of deceit including moving or dilated eyes; a swift touch of the mouth or nose; and change in posture or stance. These can all be signs contradicting what they're e saying is true.
Look for Context Clues. Did your boss call you into your office only to find him sprawled across his couch. Does that mean he's being submissive? Maybe not. Maybe he hurt his back on the racquetball court this morning and he's dying to head home -- once he gets your verbal report for the day. Just because someone shows body signals that say one thing doesn't mean there isn't another reason for the gesture. I personally suffer from horrible allergies year round which make my nose extremely itchy at times. While touching my nose while speaking with someone is usually a sign of deceit, I can honestly tell you (without touching my nose), that I do it simply to relieve an unbearable itch.
# Learn as Much As You Can. Read some books on the subject. Take a body language interpretation class. Or just watch people and compare what they say verbally to what they're body signals are telling you. The best way to becoming a body language expert is to learn ... learn ... learn ... as much as you can.
# Practice. As the old saying goes "practice makes perfect." The more you practice reading other people's body language, the more accurate you will become in your assessments.
# Learn as Much As You Can. Read some books on the subject. Take a body language interpretation class. Or just watch people and compare what they say verbally to what they're body signals are telling you. The best way to becoming a body language expert is to learn ... learn ... learn ... as much as you can.
# Practice. As the old saying goes "practice makes perfect." The more you practice reading other people's body language, the more accurate you will become in your assessments.
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