How To Catch A Cheating Spouse by Private Investigator

In the spring of 1999, I was assigned to follow a gentleman by the name of Bob. That's what I'll call him anyway as I can't reveal any identities for obvious reasons.

Bob lived in Jacksonville, Florida. He and his wife had a home in a gated community which was based around a golf course. He and his wife had three beautiful children. Both had great paying jobs and really nothing to worry about.

Until Bob's wife, I'll call her Kathy, started noticing some strange changes in Bob's behavior.

Bob normally golfed frequently as he had a lifetime membership at the golf course within their community. His golf games started getting longer and longer and it dawned on Kathy one day that although he said he had been playing golf all afternoon, he hadn't even broken a sweat in the hot Florida sun.

Kathy grew more suspicious as Bob became less and less interested in her, intimately.

Kathy contacted our agency and we met with her to discuss her case.

She explained that she was in pharmaceutical sales and traveled out of town frequently on overnight trips. She felt that he was seeing someone else while she was out of town.

We took down their personal information, vehicle descriptions and addresses and agreed to conduct surveillance.

We were sure that we had a cheating spouse to catch and were going to get the job done.

Nothing personal, just wanted to make sure that this lady was helped out as she was obviously very distraught over the situation.

Bob was a slick guy in his mid 40's. He worked for a local bank and frequented the local golf club as I mentioned above.

It was not long before we knew exactly what ole Bob was playing with on the golf course.

Acting as the average Joe that was interested in learning how to play golf, I went to the golf club one afternoon when Kathy said he was there. This was a great golf course and had a very nice "Caddy Shack".

Working in the Caddy Shack, was a petite 18 year old girl that I'll call Jennifer.

As I was at the bar, I asked Bob how long he had been playing golf, if he played quite a bit and the typical chit chat to see what he would reveal.

As I was talking to Bob, I noticed that Bob and Jennifer acted very comfortable within each other's 'personal space'. This was a dead giveaway as Jennifer was very guarded with other men at the golf club.

It wasn't long and I knew that I had him nailed, I just had to catch him.

No joke.

I followed Bob one evening when Kathy was out of town on business. Bob left his children at home with a babysitter from the neighborhood and went out to 'dinner with a business aquaintance'.

Bob went out to eat at Hooter's of all places on San Jose Blvd there in Jacksonville. It wasn't a business acquaintance, either. It was Jennifer.

I knew that Bob knew what I looked like and I couldn't take a chance of getting busted by entering the restaurant. So, I just waited out in the parking lot in my truck and got a little video of the two of them in the restaurant (Hooter's has big windows) and then taped them as the came outside and left in two separate vehicles.

She followed him as they left and I tailed behind in traffic.

This was around 10pm.

As they got closer back to the area of Bob's home, I stayed back and out of sight as I there were few cars on the road in the neighborhood and I didn't want to 'spook' them.

I stopped at the gated entrance to the neighborhood and assumed a suitable position to watch for activity for a few moments.

While I was pausing to give them time to get where they were going within the neighborhood, I saw both vehicles - both Bob and Jennifer exit back out of the gate and proceed to drive towards a Catholic church.

Cautiously following the two, I stayed back out of sight.

I observed the two as they drove to the back parking lot in two separate vehicles and immediately leave in one. He left his truck in the back parking lot of a Catholic church and left with an 18 year old girl from the golf house. (Bob was in his early 40's)

I couldn't catch up with the two as they were driving quickly through traffic and I'm not even sure where they went for two hours. Sometimes, when you absolutely know that you're going to catch a couple doing something, you've got to be extra careful not to spook them. It's very common to let someone go if you know where they'll be coming back to. I knew that Bob had to return to his vehicle and as the night hours were growing later and later, there would probably be some incriminating activities between the two of them in this church parking lot.

I waited in the parking lot until midnight.

I waited and waited. We private eyes call this "sitting" on a vehicle. Waiting for someone to return to or leave in a vehicle.

About 2:am, the two returned to the church parking lot, only driving through. I thought that they were spooked by any unknown vehicle being in the area.

I knew that they would surely return, so, I parked my truck down the street in another parking lot and quickly hiked back to the church.

I assumed a position on foot with my video camera exactly 10 feet from the front of Bob's truck.

I stood on top of an air conditioning unit that was surrounded by a concrete wall. My video camera had black electrical tape over the 'red light' so it wouldn't be seen.

I waited and waited - bugs crawling all over my face, swarming around my ears.

I was going to get the proof though.

About an hour later, Bob and Jennifer returned to the parking lot and parked right beside Bob's truck.

They exited the vehicle and stood outside talking.

Now, keep in mind, if I so much as breathed wrong or made the slightest sound, I was only 10 feet from them in the dark!!!

Moments passed that seemed like hours. I was pouring sweat, bugs were biting me yet I had to hold that camera in position and couldn't make a sound.

Then, there was what we private eye's call the 'money shot'. The video that we were paid to obtain. It's all about the evidence.

They proceeded with their intimate activities as I stood there 10 feet away filming the entire deal through the front windshield of Bob's truck.

They left, I hiked back to my truck and called Kathy, Bob's wife.

I really hated to make those kinds of phone calls. It was 3am at this point and Kathy had insisted that I called her to update her, regardless of the time.

Kathy was one mad white lady.

I expained to her in the most professional manner possible that the evidence that was needed to confirm her suspicions had been obtained by video.

Kathy drove home that night from St. Mary's Georgia and woke Bob up at 5 in the morning. He was fast asleep.

She told him to leave (kicked his but out of that house) and sent him packing.

Two weeks later I was asked to follow his U-Haul as he moved to a new apartment. She wanted the address and he wouldn't provide it, so I got it for her.

Kathy kept her house, got alimony, got child support and Bob had to go start over.

Without that evidence, Bob could have denied the whole thing and probably got away with it.

You don't necessarily need to hire a private investigator if you suspect that your spouse is cheating. Back then, I earned a living from people hiring me to follow their spouses around as they shopped, went to work, went out to who knows where, etc.

Now, I have a different point of view.

Hiring a private investigator is convenient and effective. It's also very expensive.

Normally, a P.I. will charge no less than 50 dollars an hour and alot of that time is burned up with nonsense waiting for your spouse to do something. It's very difficult to predict exactly what day your spouse is going to be engaging in an affair, so the amount of money that it would take to catch your spouse can vary widely.

My suggestion is that you use resources that are at your immediate disposal. Things you may not have thought about.

If you think that your cheating spouse is communicating with the other person on your home computer, you can easily get rock solid proof of this without their ever suspecting anything. You can find that here.

If you think that your cheating spouse is calling the other person on his or her cell phone, you can track that here.

If you suspect your spouse is having an affair at work or during 'social engagements', then I would recommend this program here.

Sometimes people just grow distant and there isn't another person involved. Maybe you've had a break up and you want to get back together with your ex, but just don't know how.

If that is the case, I recommend this program here.

Thank you for viewing my lense. I hop that is has been entertaining. The story above is true, although the names have been changed. If Bob happens to read this, well, Bob knows who he is.

Nothing in this lense is intended as legal advice and you are responsible for your actions.

Thank you for reading my lense. How to catch a cheating spouse!