"Funny Pictures and Jokes" Laughter is the key.

Funny computer photos and videos to laugh and take your mind off being serious for just a little while.
I started on squidoo about 1 week ago, and have created 3 lenses. This one seems to be performing the best. Tells me I'm progressing, which is good. I have been around computers all of my life, and just started putting my knowledge to good use, at least I think so. This is my first attempt at humor, let's see how it goes ay? So as for the question is it gonna be a cold winter? Dunno, im not a weather man, like I stated earlier.

Everyone wants to know how funny they are, don't you? If you found out, would you be willing to accept the answer ?

Research in Japan may have found a way to tell how funny a person really is. This is not by a simple recording device or a "Laugh-o-Meter" as seen on TV, but by many sensors attached to an individual's chest, cheeks and abdomen.

These attachments can take up to 3000 measurements per second, counting the bioelectricity generated by giggles, chuckles, and full laughter. The movements of your diaphragm and muscles associated with laughter are analyzed and recorded. In turn, these measurements are transferred to a new measurement variable of "aH" (that is funny aH aH), given a score and verifying if the joker you just heard is truly as funny as claimed.

There are plans of making this whole process into a portable device for easier use. This would allow us to have a gadget with us on a future date; finally we would be able to tell if he/she really thinks we are funny or is simply being polite. So for now, we will just have to go on personal opinion, but not for long.

A man is working on the buses in the US collecting tickets.

He rings the bell for the driver to set off when there's a woman half getting on the bus. The driver sets off, the woman falls from the bus and is killed. At the trial the man is sent down for murder and seeing as it's Texas he's sent to the electric chair. On the day of his execution he's sat in the chair and the executioner grants him a final wish.

"Well" says the man, "is that your packed lunch over there?" "Yes" answers the executioner. "Can I have that green banana?"

The executioner gives the man his green banana and waits till he's eaten it. When the man's finished, the executioner flips the switch sending hundreds of thousands of volts through the man. When the smoke clears the man is still alive. The executioner can't believe it.

"Can I go?" the man asks. "I suppose so" says the executioner, "that's never happened before."

The man leaves and eventually gets a job back on the buses selling tickets. Again he rings the bell for the driver to go when people are still getting on. A man falls under the wheels and is killed. The bloke is sent down for murder again and sent to the electric chair. The executioner is determined to do it right this time so rigs the chair up to the electric supply for the whole of Texas.

The bloke is again sat in the chair. "What is your final wish?" asks the executioner. "Can I have that green banana in your packed lunch ?" says the condemned man. The executioner sighs and reluctantly gives up his banana. The bloke eats the banana all up and the executioner flips the switch. Millions of volts course through the chair blacking out Texas. When the smoke clears the man is still sat there smiling in the
chair. The executioner can't believe it and lets the man go.

Well, would you believe, the bloke gets his job back on the buses. Once again he rings the bell whilst passengers are still getting on, this
time killing three of them. He is sent to the electric chair again. The executioner rigs up all United States electricity supply to The chair, determined to get his man this time. The man sits down in the chair smiling.

"What's your final wish ?" asks the executioner. "Well" says the man, "Can I have that green banana out of your packed lunch.?" The executioner hands over his banana and the man eats it all, skin included. The executioner pulls the handle and a brazillion volts go through the chair. When the smoke rises the man is still sat there alive without even a burn mark.

"I give up" says the executioner, "I don't understand how you
can still be alive after all that?". He stroked his chin. "It's something to do with that green banana isn't it" he asked.

Nahh" said the bloke,

"I'm just a really bad conductor"

source: comedy-zone

http://www.squidoo.com/flu-tracker