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Caring for Elderly Parents "Causes Stress"

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How to Cope, Manage and Decrease the Stress of Caring for Elderly Parents

I am so happy you stopped by.  I do hope this material will help you or someone you care about during this time of extra stress.


This article is designed to help those of you, like myself that are doing their best to handle and cope with the stress of caring for beloved aging parents.


I love having the opportunity to help assist my parents at this time.  They have helped me, taught me how to live healthy and taught me to have good values.

Although I love my time with them, it does add stress to my life.


Could you also use a little extra decrease in stress?

Here are some things you might want to include in your life to help de-stress it.

In this lens you will find different ways to decrease your stress, and also to enjoy your parents as much as possible while you still have the opportunity. There are also pictures of my parents and some of the rest of our family.

Be sure to make as many special moments with those you love as you can. When that opportunity is gone, you will never have it again. Don't lose the opportunity to love them. Also, if you have the chance, tell them how you feel, and let them tell you how they feel, as it will give you the closure you need.

I want to take this time to thank my brother, Robin (Robert) and my sister-in-law Glenda, as they are the main caretakers. I live a few hours away and come up as often as I can to give them a little much needed relief, as well as assist and spend time with my folks. Our entire family is indebted to them.

Thank you both so much. I love you.

This is a special time to be of assistance to those you love, but, get the help you need so you will not only survive but thrive.

Don't forget your own health, nutrition and make sure you have some down time.

To contact me just click on my name or picture in the upper right hand side of this site. You will notice an orange button by my Bio that says Contact Me. Click that and you may send me a message.

You and those you love are worth the time and effort to de-stress.

Please rate this lens and comment in the guest book. Be sure to check for related lenses.

Thank you,

Carmel
Certified Diet Wellness Coach
And Nutrition Consultant

To message me just click on
My picture - on my Bio Page
Click on the orange Contact button

Pictured you will see my mom, dad, and grandson-Tyler. taken a couple of years ago. Pictures are personal treasures-moments frozen in time. Be sure to treasure each one.

How I Cope with the Heartbreaking Stress of Caring for Elderly Parents

You must handle your stress to care for your loved ones properly.

Our parents have been our nurturers, our comforters and our role models. I know that as I was growing up I wanted to be a good person, mostly because I wanted to make my parents proud of me. My parents taught me to love our heavenly father and appreciate everything he has done for us, but, when I was small the ones I wanted to make proud, were my parents.

Now, as my parents are elderly, fragile, and not able to be as independent as when they were young and strong, it is so very sad to me. My heart feels like it is breaking. I realize it is only a matter of time until I won't have them: at least not until the resurrection.

Yes we need to be able to care of them, work and care for everything else in our busy lives. It feels like a juggling act, trying to get everything done properly?

The adjacent picture is of my dad and my aunt Lil

Love of family makes you go the extra mile for them

Families that work together are able to lighten the load.

Family reunion with my folksI love my parents and want to do a great job in caring for them. I am fortunate, my brother and sister-in-law have been fantastic help. Even my children have come in and spent week-ends caring for them to be with them and to help. So, I am very blessed in that way. I do have a caring, loving family.

Caring for elderly parents that are in their final stages of life is extremely stressful. I am trying to do what I can to cope and handle that stress, and the extreme emotional feelings that I now have.

In this picture you see some of a family reunion we enjoyed recently.
Take every opportunity to be with your elderly parents, making as many special moments as possible.

How to Minimize the Stress of Caring for Elderly Parents

Notice the Signs of Stress

There are many signs of stress. The caregiver stress may include high blood pressure, eating when you are not hungry, not eating, stress insomnia, constantly tired, anxiety, chest pains, and many more health issues that can complicate your life even further.

Stress is best handled if we keep a good schedule, going to sleep at night at the same time, and getting up at the same time. This might be difficult to do, as you don't want to keep a good schedule, but you are the boss and you need to care for yourself.

Exercise is a fantastic stress reliever. I know you are busy, but, do something that you can do right there with your parents, if you need to. Just exercise regularly. I use a rebounder, (a mini-trampoline) and work out pretty regularly. I'm not as good as I was before, but, I am doing it several times per week.

You may do whatever suits you, your schedule and your ability. But, whatever you choose, do it or something regularly. It will help you care for yourself. You will be unable to care for others properly if you don't care for yourself first.

Next, make sure you have proper nutrition. I don't mean junk here. You need to get the proper amount of vitamins, minerals, glyconutrients, fiber and enzymes found in whole foods, and whole food matrix supplements when necessary.

Candle lit bath for stress relief by Google Free Images

Additional Ways to Decrease Stress

Rebounding helps the Stress to float away

There are other things you may do to decrease your stress.
You may take a luxurious bath, a candlelit one has good ambience. Do deep breathing techniques, write in a journal, letting all your feelings and emotions spill out. Then, write down everything you feel grateful for every day.

Don't neglect exercise. I use my trusty Needak daily. Rebounding is a fantastic way to allow the stress to just float away.

For more information on Rebounding go here.

I have written out some of my feelings in this article, and it has been therapeutic for me.

It also helps to do research and read some 5* rated books and material. Sometimes we are too overwhelmed to think clearly, as stress creates its own kind of mental fog. We need the help of those who have already been there to lead the way.

These are some of the things I do to make my stress float away. Nothing is perfect, but, these things do decrease my feelings of stress. I hope this will be of use to you during this deep dark time.

You and your love ones are worth the time and effort.

Rebounding for stress relief by Google Free Images

Helpful books on how to Cope with Stress when caring for Aging Parents

Handling stress will enable you to care for your aging parents much better

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Which books do you like, which ones aren't helpful

Do these books fill your need-please share with us. Thank you

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Caring for Yourself While Caring for Your Aging Parents, Third Edition: How to Help, How to Survive by Claire Berman

Caring for Yourself While Caring for Your Aging Parents, Third Edition: How to Help, How to Survive by Claire Berman

For women and men who are involved in caring for a more...0 points

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Caring for Your Aging Parents: A Common-Sense Guide for Transforming A Difficult Time Into a Loving, Cooperative Relationship by Raeann Berman

Caring for Your Aging Parents: A Common-Sense Guide for Transforming A Difficult Time Into a Loving, Cooperative Relationship by Raeann Berman

Caring for Your Aging Parents provides crucial insights more...0 points

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Caring for Your Aging Parents: An Emotional Guide to Nurturing Your Loved Ones while Taking Care of Yourself by Raeann Berman

Caring for Your Aging Parents: An Emotional Guide to Nurturing Your Loved Ones while Taking Care of Yourself by Raeann Berman

The fastest-growing segment of our population is people more...0 points

Nutritional Aspect of Handling Stress

Balancing Calcium with Magnesium

With nutrition you are working on health and also stress at the cellular level.

Get the Very Best Nutrition Possible here

More Nutritious Ideas are here

Make sure you assist your parents to have the very best nutrition, but don't leave yourself out. You must care for yourself nutritionally to be able to handle the extra load.

This video demonstrates by means of animation the interaction of calcium and magnesium at a cellular level. It shows without a doubt that having the correct calcium/magnesium ratio helps reduce stress.

By Andrea Rosanoff, PhD, Directing Scholar, Center for Magnesium Education & Research.
Balancing Calcium with Magnesium
by organicconnectmag | video info

0 ratings | 19,493 views
curated content from YouTube

There Are Many Ways to Care for Caregivers - Here are just a few

These are only a few of the ways you may care for yourself - so you stay up and ready to care for those depending on you

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I would love to hear from you.

Has sharing my feelings helped you?

I have been doing my best to help care for my own dear parents. It is difficult, and I felt it would be therapeutic for me to allow these feelings to tumble out.


Now I want to know if this has been any help to you. I do hope so. Please share your feelings.


Thank you,


Carmel

  • TheLittleCardShop Apr 17, 2012 @ 4:31 pm | delete
    Excellent tips. I have been taking care of my father, he has been sick and my mom passed away less than 1 year ago, so it has been really stressful. Your tips will help me :)
  • Apr 17, 2012 @ 10:07 am | delete
    I have been under a lot of stress caring for the affairs of my elderly mom and dad. The best way I relieve stress is to be with them, excercising, and handling their issues a guick as possible so I do not have to worry about the issues. Not put things off is a great way to relieve stress in my opinion for me.
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  • jholland Apr 16, 2012 @ 6:50 pm | delete
    Thanks for sharing this info. I am caring for my terminally ill mother and raising a 3 year old alone. It is a lot of stress, but so nice to see my daughter and my mother have such a great relationship.
  • seriouslyafrolicious Apr 16, 2012 @ 2:59 pm | delete
    Great stress relieving tips as a caregiver
  • jordanmilesbasketballstuff Mar 28, 2012 @ 11:10 pm | delete
    What a great topic! I hope I will not have problem with my mum one day...
  • VisFeminea Feb 28, 2012 @ 5:54 am | delete
    I'm stressed now when I only think that one day I will have to take care for my lovable mommy. I love her however she complains a lot and her complaining always make me stressed ;)
    So thx for your lens it helps <3
  • Daphsam Feb 16, 2012 @ 8:11 am | delete
    It can be very stress but these are your parents that raised sand took care of you. I call my parents every day at least 5 times. I will go to the market for them, help organize doctor appointments and go with them. I love my parents and even though it's stressful at times, I will always be there for them. Thank you for your lens and relaxing ideas!
  • Petstrel Feb 4, 2012 @ 4:35 am | delete
    It can cause stress, but so can numerous other things as well. Caring for elderly is just a right thing to do.
  • TwoDogHouse Feb 1, 2012 @ 9:59 pm | delete
    Exercise is a great stress reliever for me and my preferred excercise is getting outside and walking. We are currently the caregiver for my father-in-law and I appreciate all the good info you have given in this lens.
  • piebreath Jan 21, 2012 @ 8:12 pm | delete
    You Have a Nice Lens Some Vary intersting stuff
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  • grainne Dec 29, 2011 @ 1:18 am | delete
    These are really great ways to reduce stress. You can also take exercise as a technique of reducing stress. It will keep you healthy and fit. Exercise improves blood circulation and through this body gets proper oxygen.
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  • iCare4uk Oct 11, 2011 @ 3:46 am | delete
    Hi Carmel, really nice lens with good information.
  • RecipePublishing Aug 21, 2011 @ 3:05 pm | delete
    Thank you.
  • Jane Klatt Jun 29, 2011 @ 10:14 am | delete
    Great advice for dealing with stress. We are all here for a short time, so treasure your loved ones. God Bless you. Mesothelioma Lawyer
  • Joan4 May 6, 2011 @ 8:13 pm | delete
    My parents have been gone quite a while now, but your advice on stress still stands - for all times of life. Good information! Thank you.
  • BalanceByDesign May 6, 2011 @ 11:06 am | delete
    I also cared for my parents in their last years and wouldn't change that time with them for anything in the world. But, yes it was very stressful. Wish I'd had your article to read back then.
  • Ladymermaid May 2, 2011 @ 5:10 pm | delete
    It is a tremendous labor of love to care for an aging parent. Best wishes.
  • maranda1 Apr 20, 2011 @ 12:34 am | delete
    Nowadays more and more people are suffering from stress. It's harmful to our health and our life. How to deal with stress? I will share you with my experiences.
  • Margo_Arrowsmith Apr 13, 2011 @ 4:40 pm | delete
    Lenrolled to "Changing the Guard: Caring for You Elderly Parents"

    I hope you will join us at www.changingtheguardblog.com
  • KayeSI Apr 7, 2011 @ 9:13 am | delete
    Very interesting article. As one who is also caring for elderly parents - both near and far - I can definitely relate! One suggestion I can add is to invest in one of the cell phones for senior citizens. They are more simple and easy to use than the smart phones I love, meaning my senior mom will actually use hers. :) And when I have to be gone, I know she can go for a walk and call for help if she falls or has problems. They even help in a large store, so we can each head in different directions, knowing how easily we can call each other. My elderly mom's Jitterbug cell phone has been a BIG blessing for me. Thanks again for the tips.
  • Carmel_Aaron Apr 7, 2011 @ 10:10 am | delete
    Thanks for the Easy Cell phone tip-Great idea. I couldn't have said it any better.
    So happy you enjoyed the lens and the other tips.
  • Alohagems Apr 3, 2011 @ 8:19 pm | delete
    Very nice article. I was a CNA and I love caring for the elderly. Good information
  • Jacqueline Fox Apr 1, 2011 @ 10:31 am | delete
    Caring for the elderly can both be a rewarding and stressful job. I have worked as a caregiver for clients who have had back and hip surgeries in 2 years, and sometimes it just doesn't get any better. My greatest stressor is when I have to reposition my patients every 30mins to 2 hours to prevent them from getting pressure ulcers. Thanks for sharing these tips on how to deal with the stressors of taking care of an elderly. These tactics would be most handy with one of my highly agitated patients who has been stressed out after learning about the DePuy Hip Replacement Recall issues.
  • Ladymermaid Feb 19, 2011 @ 11:37 am | delete
    There is also an aging category where this might fit well. Healthy living-aging. Check out the subtopics in that area as you may have a number of lenses which would work well there. Best wishes.
  • Rafick Jan 24, 2011 @ 10:30 am | delete
    Thanks for this lens.
  • katskloset Jan 8, 2011 @ 11:36 am | delete
    Excellent information and support here. Carmel. I've been in this position twice so far and looking at another possibility in the near future. Will be back more if my life does take that turn!
  • Goodpal Dec 20, 2010 @ 9:18 am | delete
    Think of including meditation, particularly the mindfulness meditation in routine in which most members of the family sit together and meditate. Even a few minutes of collective silence and peaceful harmony is going to do wonders for everyone. The feelings of mutual goodwill get stronger and the atmosphere can be so light for any stress to survive.

    If meditation appears hard, praying in group is another highly rewarding activity for any family.

    Thanks for a good lens and good topic.
  • Tipi Dec 8, 2010 @ 12:24 pm | delete
    This is wonderful, thank you! We are staring to look at how much support Mom may need in the next few years though she still lives by herself. We wonder about the little things that are forgotten and I'm thinking I should move closer. She's not ready for someone to live with her and I don't want to impose. There sure is a lot to think about. Mom is 84 and still runs to the mail box. She does drive locally and to town now and then but we know the days for that are growing shorter. Well done and helpful!
  • CCGAL Nov 11, 2010 @ 4:55 pm | delete
    Until very recently, I have been a "sandwich generation" care giver. I cared for my mother-in-law in my home for the last 11 years of her life, while caring for a disabled child and a very sick husband. I didn't really realize how stressful those years were until after my dear mother-in-law passed away, and my daughter took over some of the care-giving for my son. Now I am in my "past 50" years and look back wondering how on earth I survived. I feel for you, very deeply. What I can tell you from my own experience, though, is that you will never regret the loving care you provided. Bless you and your loving family.
  • aj2008 Nov 8, 2010 @ 2:59 pm | delete
    Isn't it strange (or maybe it is not) that sometimes we find ourselves somewhere like this lens, that we can really relate to what we ourselves are going through.

    Thank you :)
  • mamakat Jan 10, 2010 @ 3:55 pm | delete
    Hi Carmel,
    This is a very nice lens, informative and useful information. Enjoy your parents, for whatever time you still have with them.
    Your module on stress management was very good. Dealing with stress has always one of my most difficult issues with almost everything in my life.
    Your lens caught my eye, as we lost my mother-in-law this past May at age 99.
    She actually did very, very well up til the last couple of years. She was never sick, and had actually never been to a doctor in many, many years (like 50 or 60)
    The last couple of years she had episodes of dementia, with hallucinations and voices--that came and went. She was still taking care of herself at that point.
    Around the first part of last year, she began getting sick. Wouldn't go to the doctor. I went to check on her one day (she was in another house on our property....400' away). She was on the floor and nearly unconcious....I called the ambulance. They put her in ICU and told us not to have too high of hopes. Within two days they had moved her out to a regular room. Two days later, they transferred her to a nursing home for the quick recovery program. Three weeks later she was home. She was still a little bit 'with it' mentally, but physically she was not at all functional. I bathed her, changed her, fed her, by myself most of the time. (Ya gotta know, I'm the one who doesn't want to babysit my niece's baby.....cuz I can't deal with diapers....So that part of caring for her was extremely difficult for me) But I did it!
    I am so thankful I was able to. She was able to pass away in her own home, with me there with her, and my husband being able to spend some good time with her at the end--which would have been much more difficult if we'd left her in the nursing home.
    ...but Praise God, 10 days after her 99th birthday, she roared into heaven on her '37 Harley Davidson, yelling 'whooo-heeee what a ride!' ( We have pictures of her on that motorcycle, taken back during WWII era) She's with Jesus now, and no longer sick or in pain.
  • Ramkitten Dec 2, 2009 @ 10:12 pm | delete
    I care for my elderly, widowed mom, who thankfully is still able to live in her own home. A few years ago, she and my dad, who'd been diagnosed with esophogal cancer, moved across the country to be near me, so I could help them. My older brothers live far from here, so I'm on my own. For me, my best stress relief is a good hike.
  • Askyourquestion Aug 22, 2009 @ 9:16 pm | delete
    Nice lens! You've shared some very helpful resources and information here. Please feel free to drop by my lens and say hi when you get the chance.
  • Carmel_Aaron Jun 19, 2009 @ 3:40 pm | delete
    Thank you for your comment.

    Yes, it is good that you have family right there.

    I don't live too far, but at this time I wished I was closer. My brother lives right next to them, and he and his wife have been fantastic.

    I go back and forth as much as possible. It is just under a 3 hour trip one way.

    I also speak to them every day now. I want to be involved as much as possible.

    It's amazing how they become more precious as time gets closer to the end.

    We need to take advantage of the time we still have our parents-so there are no
    regrets later.

    This is actually a very special time. We have grown much closer.
  • Susan52 Jun 19, 2009 @ 2:23 pm | delete
    My difficulty is living far from my parents. I'm blessed to have a brother and sister close to them who take great care of both of them who, fortunately, are in good health at this point. I'm lensrolling this to my Aging Baby Boomers lens.
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Hello world. I'm Carmel Aaron the Certified Diet Wellness Coach and Nutrition Consultant. I teach classes, write a newspaper column, a magazine column... more »

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