Ego Deflation - Think it's Easy?

As an active alcoholic, I believed I was the center of the Universe. I had claw marks on everything. I couldn't let go of control. Holding everything together was my job.

What happened to me was, after years of drinking and drugging, I crashed. Luckily I crashed into Alcoholics Anonymous. There I learned that if I didn't change the person I brought in I would drink again.

Terrified that I would drink again; I became "teachable". I was asked if I was willing to go to any lengths. I was and my journey into ego deflation began.

Taking a look at yourself is very painful especially when there's no booze or drugs to cover up the memory of what you do.

"The Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous" was where I started and learned that I had to dig deep and be accountable for what had transpired during all those years. A chink in my armor was letting me see how I operated. Humility was entering my life.

Why doesn't the better job, more money, a bigger better anything satisfy us? We seem to be suffering from the disease of more.

Addicted, if you will, to finding the most money, the best relationship & romance, best children, best family, best friends, best home, best career, more status, a cause, our values, our beliefs, our opinions, approval...............the list goes on forever!!! And still there's a hole in your soul and not enough anything to fill that hole up.

Our thoughts control us. We seem to believe that our thoughts are who we are, and our thinking has taken us over. This is disease. We don't know that thought are things and that if we change our thoughts, we will change our lives. It's not easy, we have to erase years of old tapes and continually fill up with positive uplifting thoughts. Thoughts are actually energy or vibrations that go out into the Universe and the Universe responds - every time. However, the Universe is very litteral and the thought must be precise. For now, just work on thinking positive thoughts. Whenever one of those negative thoughts come in, get rid of it - replace it with a positive thought. For now, be aware of your thinking. Is it clear and deliberate or more like the "Monkey Mind"?

Here's a quote from ACIM ("A Course in Miracles") - "Fear of the Will of God is one of the Strangest beliefs the human mind has ever made."

The ego wants us to fear the will of God. The ego is fueled by fear.



Here's a quote from: "Take Me to Truth Undoing the Ego" by: Nouk Sanchez & Tomas Vieira.

"The ego, being expressed through compulsive thought is always trying to fix things. One of its major roles is to remove, repress or resist emotional pain. This is a full-time job that it works at continually; hence the incessant string of thoughts that it generates. The ego drives hard to eliminate pain; yet, all it does is further intensity it. The harder the mind works to stop the pain, the greater the pain. This is a never-ending battle, with the mind never arriving at a solution. Why? Because the ego is the problem."

The pain is always in the resistance; what we resist persists! The other thing that was equally hard for me to learn was that "It's ALWAYS me. Yikes. The "Acceptance Prayer" from AA helped me with this. My sponsor made me tape it to my fridge and everytime I went for food, the prayer was there in my face. Here is the prayer:

Acceptance, Acceptance, Acceptance!

Acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I,m disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing or situation, some fact of my life, unacceptable to me, and I can't find serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it's supposed to be at this moment. Nothing happens in God's world by mistake. Until I could accept my alcholism, I could not stay sober; unless I accept life completely on life's terms, I cannot be happy.