How to Make New Friends

In our increasingly mobile society, we often find ourselves living hundreds or thousands of miles away from the friends and relations of our childhood. When this happens, we need to learn how to make new friends. For some people, this process comes completely naturally; they can hardly go to the market without befriending someone! For most of us, however, making friends is more difficult - but it's not impossible if you approach it systematically.

First off, what kind of people do you like? Have most of your past friends been doctors, quilters, librarians, or auto mechanics? Whatever your answer, those are the kinds of people you'll target when deciding how to make new friends. Now, where to meet them? Simple -- if your best friends in the past were librarians, go to the library to meet new ones. Or you can frequent places librarians and bookworms go, such as book stores and coffee shops.

But suppose you want to extend yourself beyond your current boundaries. For example, suppose your former friends were not the best types of people, and you'd like to figure out how to make new friends who will be a better influence in your life. In this case, begin by visualizing your "best self." What kind of person do you really want to be? If you'd like to be more religious, look for friends in church. If you'd like to be more domestic, take a cooking class.

When you actually get in a situation where potential friends are gathered, what should you do? Well, you really know everything you need to know about how to make new friends. Choose an icebreaker that will establish a bond between you and your most likely candidate. For instance, suppose you are a car buff who has come face to face with an auto mechanic working on a Honda. You could begin by saying, "Wow, she's a beauty. I used to have one just like her." Or suppose you're a mother with several small children, scoping out the other moms at a playground. You could say, "Your daughter is so cute - I think she's about the same age as mine." Using this technique, you'll find it's not hard to strike up a conversation. And now you know how to make new friends!

Then what? After the conversation has gone on for some time, you may want to offer your new friend your phone number. You may want to give some reason for this, such as setting up a toddler play date or showing off your new quilt, or you can come right out and say that you're new in town and trying to make friends. In all likelihood, your new friend will be warm and welcoming.

With these tips, you should definitely have conquered your fears of how to make new friends, and you'll be well on your way to developing friendships you will treasure for years.

If you need more practical information regarding how to make friends then have a look at Dale Carnegie's audio book How to Win Friends and Influence People. His advice and time-tested information might just be what you were looking for all your life.

You can download the How to Win Friends and Influence People audio here...

You may also be interested in the following Rocket Language courses to help you learn a foreign language fast. You never know when you might need to speak a second language since you now know how to make a lot of new friends...

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