The Married Man’s Guide to Sex at Walt Disney World

I started in on this "family man" thing early - marrying at 21 and subsequently fathering four children, with an eleven year span between the first child and the last. Here's what I've figured out along the way.

1. Try to have a good relationship with your wife year-round so that the romance factor on any one trip does not make or break the marriage.

2. Pretend you're teen-agers again and sneak in a few kisses in the back seats of rides like "The Many Adventure's of Winnie the Pooh" or "Journey into Imagination with Figment". Stick with kissing though - there are cameras everywhere, no matter how dark and private it may seem.

3. Here's the best "trick" we've managed to come up with - it's not much but it's all I've got: Tell the kids, "We'll let you get ready in here where there's more room. Your mom and I will get ready in the bathroom." Have the TV on to the Disney channel or whatever program usually makes them super-slow when you're trying to get them out the door for school. At the very least, you may get a shower together.

***Programs for children that will give you a little "Alone Time"***

These activities have extra costs associated with them but may be the best option for families traveling alone.

Some of the Deluxe resorts offer evening childcare programs - for a price. You don't have to stay at these resorts to use these programs but advance reservations are a good idea because that hotel's guests get priority placement. Some wives are okay with traveling to another state and leaving their children with complete strangers in resort "Kids Clubs"...mine is not. She feels that there is a disconnect in the logic that says "talking to strangers" is dangerous but "staying with strangers" is okay. But your wife might be a bit more open minded. These programs get great reviews and will give you some time alone. It is also important to note that children generally must be at least three and be fully potty trained.

Disney offers some fun Specialty Cruises like the Albatross Treasure Cruise (Yacht Club resort), Bayou Pirate Cruise (formerly Sassagoula River Adventure Cruise - Port Orleans Riverside Resort), and the Islands of the Caribbean Pirate Adventure for kids ages 4-10. These are generally 2 hours long and cost $34 + tax per child. If you're not staying at those resorts, you probably won't have time to get back to your own hotel room but you can enjoy a little time alone and maybe a nice lunch date.

***Traveling with friends & family***

It seems like it should be pretty easy to spend a little time alone with your wife when you are on a trip with friends and family but this can be surprisingly tricky. Here are some tips for a successful trade off:

1.) Don't wait until you get to Walt Disney World to make your date night plans. It is just too easy for them to get lost in the shuffle. Make plans with your sister or friend in advance and decide which evenings you plan to trade-off childcare. The evening following your day at Animal Kingdom or one of the water parks can be a great option because those parks close early. Become co-conspirers in the quest for a date night and make your Dining Reservations in advance.

2.) Do your kids know these friends or family members well enough to feel comfortable with them in a strange environment? If not, you might schedule your date night for later in the trip when they've had more time to get acquainted.

3.) Don't limit yourself to dinner dates or shows - consider sending the kids off to the theme park with your friends or family in the morning when they're feeling rested and excited. Then you and your spouse can get breakfast together or just stay at the resort and - well, that's your business.

4.) Grandparents can get really peculiar at Walt Disney World - we've seen it happen a lot. They sometimes decide that the WHOLE family should do EVERYTHING together. The size of the parks and the energy required to manage kids sometimes overwhelms grandparents. So, once again, we recommend that you set your plan in advance if you hope to get some time alone with your spouse.

Idea #1: Make a reservation for a character meal that Grandparents & Grandkids can all enjoy together - the average character meal lasts about 90 minutes. You can stretch that time by timing a reservation at Ohana (Polynesian resort - not a character meal but a lot of fun), Chef Mickey's (Contemporary resort), or the Cinderella Happily Ever After dinner (Grand Floridian Resort) to end in time to watch the Electric Water Pageant.

Idea #2: Dinner shows like Hoop Dee Doo Revue (Ft. Wilderness Campground), Mickey's Backyard Barbeque (Ft. Wilderness Campground), or the Spirit of Aloha Luau (Polynesian Resort) are other options. Grandparents and older children or teens might enjoy a special night of dinner followed by Cirque Du Soleil's LaNouba in Downtown Disney - this isn't cheap but it is fun.

Idea #3: A low cost (free) idea is to send them to the Campfire Sing-Along with Chip & Dale at the Fort Wilderness campground. Just remember that Grandmothers have a sneaky habit of deciding the grandkids are tired or cold and they could show up sooner than expected.

In all probability, your Walt Disney World Family Vacation will probably not win any "Most Romantic Vacation Ever" awards but - with a little planning and a little luck - well, you might just get lucky.

Click Here for Disney World Crowd Information & Ride Closures During Your Vacation Travel Dates

Disney World is huge - about twice the size of Manhattan - and there are lots of resorts, hundreds of restaurants, and tons of entertainment options. You can spend a lot of time becoming a Disney World expert or you can enlist the services of someone who eats, sleeps, and breathes Disney every day. We book directly through Walt Disney World and there are never any extra fees or costs associated with using us to help plan your vacation. We'll help with your itinerary, book dining on your behalf, and even provide theme park touring plans that keep you ahead of the crowd and out of the long lines - all at no extra cost. Contact us today - there's no obligation and we're happy to answer all of your questions about our services.

Build A Better Mouse Trip
Toll free: 877-815-6515