How To Raise a Child in 18 Years

One thing I've noticed over the years is people have trouble knowing when to have their child let go of the pacifier. Getting rid of the pacifier can be very easy if done early enough. But if you wait too long, it can be much more difficult.

Now, I'll be the first to admit, I'm not a "certified" expert. My children were bottle fed, so I have no experience with how breast feeding can affect this. But what I am about to say worked for me with both of my children.

With my two children, we stopped giving them the pacifier around two to three months old. Part of the reason was the baby would just spit it out. But that could be that we stopped using the pacifier just to "pacify" the baby.

What I noticed when I stopped using the pacifier is that the baby had different cries. In fact, what I discovered is that, particularly when the infant was young, he really cried for only one of 3 reasons. He was uncomfortable. He was hungry, Or he was hurt or scared.

How does that help? Instead of giving the baby a pacifier to keep him quiet, if you solve the need, the baby will stop crying. When the baby would start crying, I would first change his diaper, then I would feed him. It worked every time.

As the baby got older, he would add being lonely to the things that would make him cry. But that was easily solved by bringing him to where we are. When he could sense us near, he would feel at ease.

Why was the baby able to forget the pacifier? At that young age, the baby only has a short term memory. It only remembers what is going on at that time. Things that it sees over and over do, over time, begin to be remembered. But it is easier for a child at that age to forget the need for the pacifier.

The best part of all? The baby never began sucking his thumb. I think a lot of babies start sucking their thumb as a replacement for the pacifier once they learn to satisfy themselves with it. If you can stop the attachment early, you can head it off before it happens.

Now, how can you stop a 2 year old from using the pacifier? I don't know. I'll admit that. I have no experience with stopping a child who has become attached to the pacifier. The only thing I might could say would be to just take it away. They will resist at first. but with some time, they will learn they don't need it.

If you are the parent of a newborn infant, using the pacifier during the first couple of months can be of help. But the sooner you stop using the pacifier, the easier it will be to quit. Try it, and see if it works for you.

Being a great parent is difficult. Very difficult. But as hard as it is, it is important to remember that as parents, we are role models. How we treat other people, especially our spouses, will influence the way our children behave.

The question then becomes how do we model the behavior that we want our children to have. We must all ask ourselves this question. It is a question that should be in our minds whenever we interact with anyone.

Sometimes, things get out of hand between spouses. I've been there at times myself. The "experts" tell us not to fight in front of the children. This sounds great, but it is way too difficult.

A better solution is whenever your children do see you fight, that they also see you make up. We need to teach them that we are not perfect. That we, too, make mistakes. Children should see us apologize to each other anytime things get out of hand.

But what do you do when you feel you are beyond that point? What do you do when you feel you have no choice but to split up?

In some cases, especially in the case of abuse, getting away from the situation, and getting the children away safely, is the best thing you can do.

But what if there is no abuse? What if you just simply feel things are not working out.

While research shows that children of divorced parents do suffer, it is also true that there are plenty of children of single parents who become successful.

If you truly want to try to make up with your spouse, but are not sure how to proceed, before you get a divorce, please check out The Magic of Making Up. Learn how to make up with your mate. This can be the biggest gift you can give your children.

When two parents are in a loving relationship, children feel safe. And that is when you can reach your children. Learn to be a better spouse, and you will also learn to be a better parent.