Reborns - Fake Babies - 'Living' Baby Dolls - Right Or Wrong?

Reborn babies are a very strange new concept and extremely hard to categorise. They are not considered dolls but instead are referred to as babies, and these 'babies' are now taking up residence in the homes of fully grown women who need to fill a void in their lives; and this is where the frighteningly lifelike Reborn rears its ugly head; or should I say perfect one...Popular in the USA since the 1990's, and now unfortunately surfacing on a big scale here, and in Australia.

Reborn babies bear a striking resemblance to a real baby, and this is where the problem lies. Harrods has refused to stock them because of this very reason. A Reborn is not a doll as such; instead they are very realistic looking, and lifelike 'Living Dolls'. Their owners and the makers insist we refer to them as babies, and get quite offended if we were to call them dolls. So babies it is! - and very scary they are too!

The reborns are made with a huge amount of loving care. Their human hair is attached strand by strand, much like a hair transplant, and the Reborns are quite often made to order to look like a particular given child. People will bring in photos of a baby, and the creator will make an exact replica. These babies are not aimed at children but more at the adult market.

One particular customer who cannot have children, orders these babies on a regular basis to add to her already overflowing nursery, and to satisfy her mothering instinct. The parents of these babies spend a fortune on their outfits, probably far more than they would on a baby of their own, and they parade them around town in their prams as if it were a perfectly natural thing to do.

These woman are not mad, or delusional, they are just completely accepting that this just might be the closest that they can ever get to owning a baby of their own. So it seems perfectly right that they should display their Reborns for all to admire. They are not at all embarrassed at the fact that these babies are not actually flesh and blood, and the mothers become very attached to them when first getting them.

They spend a lot of time on the bonding process, till they come to love them. They invent in their own minds, qualities that they think the babies would possess and character traits they think that they can see in the Reborns, until they have the full picture, and then their love is duly cemented, and the mother and baby bond is well and truly created.

One woman had flown to New York to take delivery of her Reborn, and after three days of bonding in a hotel room, she noticed a mark on the back of the Reborns neck, and said, "She will have to go back to be repaired". This woman had flown all the way out to America, and now she was absolutely desolate that she had to return home without her baby.

What really worries me is, that if the Reborn has gone to a mother who has lost a child, how will this affect the natural grieving process? Surely the Reborn made in the image of a lost child, has got to have a very serious and lasting impact upon the mother, and quite possibly some very harmful and insidious repercussions somewhere along the line.

I question whether the supply of these reborns is fully thought through though. I know all too well that ultimately this is of course, a business venture. But what they are appealing to here, in the main, is the loneliness and hopelessness of a barren woman. In one instance a grandmother had purchased one after searching online for sites to gain information on the Reborn. She missed her granddaughter terribly after her daughter had emigrated abroad taking the child with them.

The grandmother had looked after the child for a number of years whilst her daughter was ill and she was obviously traumatised when the child was taken back. So now the grandmother pushes in her coach built pram, the exact Reborn replica of her granddaughter as a baby which was copied from the photograph she supplied. As she coos and smiles at her Reborn, whilst pushing the pram through the town, the reaction from her friends and neighbours is a head shaking response, as they don't quite know what to make of it all.

The thing about these Reborns is, that they look exactly like a real baby, right down to the very last detail. They even make them as 'breathers', as they are known in this trade. A fully breathing baby, whose chest rises and falls, with a tiny detectable heartbeat. To watch these woman crying when they first take charge of their reborn is heartbreaking really, and no matter how much it might look like the photograph of their stillborn, dead, alive baby or grandchild, what effect emotionally must this experience be, of caring and loving for what is ultimately a doll. Leaving these poor bereft mothers questioning their own motives in the end.

Reactions vary from people when coming across a mother pushing a reborn in its pram. Some people snigger and point, others are totally accepting; and can see the appeal in owning a baby that does not cry, need a bottle, or have to have it's nappy changed. One mother goes as far as keeping a bottle in the pram for feeding time and the formula is made up from clothes conditioner as it is the right colour and does not go stale.

There are cheap and tacky inexpensive Reborns out there and I don't worry about them. It is the quality Reborns which look exactly like a real baby that concern me. Now whether the makers of the Reborns were aware of this niche gap in the market, or whether they have actually produced these for children is debatable. What I do know is that these Reborns are being targeted at and marketed to a very real and vulnerable audience. With an asking price of £250, and up to as much as £1,700, it's not exactly going to end up in a child's Christmas stocking.

I wonder what the reborn is appealing to on a very base level, and also is it morally right. Also I wonder what effect this new arrival has on the rest of the family. The time involvement seems considerable, as these babies are treated as the real thing. With wash times, clothes changing, holding and loving. - Harmless? - I'm not so sure. Because one day it is going to hit these traumatised mothers that 'nothing' can replace the real thing. And in these moments of realisation it has the capacity to possibly break their hearts.-

Yes there will always be collectors of dolls, but the majority of these babies are not going to these homes. They are going to grown up women who will treat them as a real baby, and these dolls will become a huge part of their lives. Emotionally, looking to the future, what consolation and sense of attachment can a man made doll bring to a mother who is desperate to have a baby of her own? Some owners have even experienced overwhelming feelings of disgust wash over them unexpectedly. I find this really worrying.

The Reborns are weighted to any level. You can have one with a floppy head, like a newborn. A light weight Reborn or a heavy one, It all depends on your preference. The hair can be straight or curly, or none at all. Basically, these Reborns are built to your specifications. They can have a baby rash or birthmark, and the grandmother who had one built in her granddaughters image, wanted a face rash, just like her granddaughter had.

These dolls are available as 'sleepers' 'eyes open', 'smilers' and the really scary ones, 'breathers', and they come with a very strange trademark; a nappy over their heads! "British department store Harrods - whose motto is "Everything for Everybody Everywhere" - describes them as "a bit too life-like" to stock". Reborns have been going in USA since the 1990's; a bit too long for my liking.

On the site that I visited were the words: "Becoming a new mommy is a very exciting experience, but that sweet bundle of joy grows up all too fast. Our babies let you hold onto that precious time forever".

Christianna Garrett-Martin

Reborn pictures for this article gathered from this site