Who is Ruth Read

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When I was posed this question about 3 weeks ago, I couldn't answer it.

I have been on that same quest for who I am for 25 to 30 years. So now I have to answer it and explain just who I am and what I am all about.

Many years ago I was very unhappy. We went to church like our friends. We drank and partied like our friends. To me life I was so empty. None of it meant anything and church sure did not have the answers I was looking for. Church was everything I was not.

The first thing I did was sober up. Well, I lost a lot of drinking buddies with that one. Nobody was happy about it. As old friends dropped off - new friends came into my life. I find that as I look to find an answer I soon get it, and with that answer come new friends.

I had to find a home for my parrot so I could sober up. He loved to drink cheap champagne with me and we shared the same glass! He would not take no for an answer.

Well, I always had a lot of pets but none liked to drink with me like my parrot did. It felt like giving up a child but I did it and he has a wonderful new home with other parrots and animals.

That was a tough year for me. I Did it cold turkey with everyone offering me drinks. I soon just quit going to dinner and basically stopped hanging out. I was very boring to my old set of friends.

One day I said to myself: So this is what it is like to be sober.

I was boring myself. But something just kept nagging me. The questions kept coming. I had to get really sick before I met the 2 people that turned my world around. Basically, I had no one to converse about these feelings with because everyone I knew was so into their churches.

My son was amazing. When he was young he would tell me things that sounded so crazy. But I opened my mind and I think he is the one that was pointing the way.

I soon knew that the mind was the most important thing a person could have. Then I almost lost mine. This is kind of boring so I will spare you the details and only tell you I was in such a state that I would not go anywhere by myself. I got lost just driving less than 2 miles from home the same way I always drove to and from work every day. A lot of other stuff too.

Then I met someone that said I should meditate. It had changed her life.

So, that didn't work very well. At that time in my life I thought meditation was sitting in an uncomfortable position and thinking about nothing. Nothing has changed about that. I still think that is the way some people meditate. However, I still had these burning questions about life. I found a way to meditate and it is not boring at all!

And then I met Dr. Stolts and Joel. I picked up a book one day and I started vibrating. Really! I put it down. Every time I tried to read it, I vibrated. It was like that when I would try to meditate. This got much more intense.

This had happened to me before - when I was a teenager - and it scared me so bad. Now when It happened I was older and I was thinking along the lines of spiritual things. Not church, but spiritual. I was a very spiritual person. I knew somehow that what church taught was all wrong. I couldn't prove it, but I could sure feel it. I did not need someone to tell me what is right and what is wrong. I knew it inside me. I felt that I had everything I needed inside me. Turns out, I was right.

I had always noticed that my dogs knew what I wanted before I would tell them. Many times I never even had to tell them.

I sometimes felt that I could talk to them mentally inside my head and they understood me. I was amazed at how I would think, for instance, that I wanted to go for a ride in the car or for a walk. The dog would be on their feet and like 'Let's go.' I thought maybe it was my body language.

I tested it.

I changed everything about how I approached it. They still always knew.

Then I said 'I wish I could meet a person that talks to animals.' By now I had read a few books and vibrated through them. I needed to meet a person that I could afford.

I met the nicest woman. Maureen Hall. She had me sign up a few people at a grooming shop (I had sold mine) and she came and did a 2 day gig with us. She stayed overnight at my house. At this point I was getting really good at conversing with animals. Nobody knew.

I had quit watching mindless TV so I would spend evenings reading my books and meditating or conversing with animals and sometimes people. Joel however was telling me I needed to do things differently.

I got frustrated as I could not get instant gratification. So I let that part slip away. It made since what he said and I always needed to be cleared of stuff. So I quit. I didn't need that any more. I kept on meditating and vibrating. I would vibrate so hard that one time I asked my husband to put his hand on my tummy. He said it was vibrating and quickly removed his hand. That is what I wanted to know. Was I really vibrating or just thinking I could feel it.

I have branched out to trying remote viewing and Holosync .I started with holosync and it hurt my brain when I started. But I had read what it does for you and figured my brain was such mush that I stuck with it. It saved my life. I have since found many other companies that sell similar mind control. I have also done a little NLP.

I am so happy that I can't remember and don't even care why I was so unhappy before. If I just keep it all to myself I am fine. I didn't say a word as to what I was doing. It is amazing how as I changed myself, the people around me seemed to change.

I seemed to have a huge impact on people. My life is so different now. I bet I would be a mess if I had never quit drinking. 3 or 4 times a year I will have a glass of champagne. But I notice that I really don't like the taste at all anymore.

I have been a vegetarian for many years. I really can't eat meat. I think that it affects me mentally. How can you eat an animal when you can converse with them? I feel so sorry for the way they are raised. If I could turn them all lose I would.

Somewhere in the middle of this mess of a life I decided to try to do everything I had wanted to do.

When my kids were young we would go to a museum and look at paintings. I would say, "I could paint that". Of course nobody but I would believe that I could.

And I always said I would write children's books. I was going to save that for when I got older. So here I am older.

I paint, and now I write children's books. But it all started happening when I said I have to change everything I do. How I do it. If I crossed my legs, I would make a conscious effort to cross them the other way. And if I clasp my hands in my lap I would change the way my fingers lay.

I looked every day for something to change. I changed the way I dressed, my hair style, and the way I talked. I am still looking for ways to change. I started sticking up for myself. It has been a long trip.

I feel like I am now ready for something big, something new. I know that most people I know would be so surprised at who I really am. They just don't know.

When I look back I can see that I was in control of my life by how I was feeling and acting. All I had to do was change that and I changed my life.

It was really nice to read Louise Hay. Someone else believed what I did. Imagine that!

Other people out there were like me. I have found that it is nice to hear other people say it out loud. There are people like me that feel like me. Imagine that!

I just discovered I am part of this human race. For years I felt disconnected. I did not belong. I was not like anyone out there. Nobody was anywhere near like me.

Now I feel we are all connected. If I breathe in, you breathe out. If you breathe in I breathe out. We are all so connected we can't possibly live without each other.

What a different person I am. I would not change a thing about my life. Every experience I have had, good or bad has made me who I truly am. I have had some tough knocks in this life. Now I know that when tough times are here, I am learning something very important. I have to sit still and listen to what it is. I have learned how to turn a bad situation into a good one.

So I have a small list of suggestions that a person can do to start a new exciting life. It might not feel so exciting at first but the day will come when you are so glad that YOU are the one that stood out. YOU are the one that did what nobody else could. YOU were the leader.

You can do all the following without saying a thing to people. You do not owe anyone an explanation as to why you choose to follow a new path. Just smile a lot. Smile from inside your heart. That alone is huge.

1) Sober up and don't worry about whether your friend s like it or not.

2) Get new friends. You won't have to look for them. Simply say what you want in your friends and they will show up just really wanting to help you any way they can.

3) Turn off that TV

4) Only read uplifting thing s and monitor what news you watch

5) Be the one that steps up when no one else will.

6) Take responsibility for yourself. That means think about what you are about to do before you do it. How will it affect others?

7) Make a plan on how to change your life. Start out small and move ahead one step at a time.

8) Most important BE THE LEADER in your life. Be the one you would look up to. Are you the person you would like to be? Be that person!

9) Inspire people to better themselves by being the example. You don't have to say one word.

10) Decide to be happy and you will be happy. Smile from within your heart and you will radiate life. How could you be sad if you radiate life?

I have never been a writer but here I am writing. I have lost the cobwebs in my brain. I have never known how to do whatever I have done in my life. I find that if I have to do it, it somehow comes to me how to do it.

When I sat down at this computer tonight I was going to work on my children's stories. But this sort of fell out of me. That burning question who am I?

Well, Ruth Read is a lot of things. First of all I am very spiritual. And second I am whatever I want to be!

So I am a child, wife, mother, sister, artist, photographer, and writer. I love to travel. I will add to this list as long as I breathe.

I have done everything I ever had on my list and added to it many times.

There is no way a person could have planned my life and I like it just the way it is. Right now I am going through a difficult time, but I embrace that as I will soon be at a new higher level than I have ever been.

I have learned that as problems come and go I become stronger and stronger. Usually the worse the problem the stronger I get. Oh, I am not asking for problems here. I realize that I have to stand up and greet them or I will fall back into that mindless hole I spent my life crawling out of. This time around, I'm aiming for the best!