Mentoring

Mentoring - What's It All About?

For 13-year-old Jake*, the trouble started when his dad walked out. One day his father was there, and the next he was gone. Since Jake's mom was barely earning enough to make ends meet, she soon took a second job, and he was left on his own after school. Jake started hanging out with a rough crowd and it wasn't long before his B-grades started sliding.

By the time Brad* - a young man coaching baseball at Jake's school - started mentoring him, the teen had already been picked up once for petty theft and was ready to drop out of school. Jake's life was at a crossroads: Down one road lay a bright future; down the other, continued hardship, menial jobs - perhaps even a prison record. In Brad, Jake found the "big brother" he craved, and the second chance he so desperately needed. Three years later, his life is back on track - and Brad's still only a phone call away.

What is mentoring?

We've all had a mentor at some point in our lives. Perhaps it was the grade-school teacher who spent extra time with you after class and gave your confidence a boost. Or the coach who helped you improve your game through one-on-one practice. Maybe it was the uncle who listened when you were being bullied at school, and offered useful tips on what to do about it. Or the neighbor who made you feel less alone because s/he understood your fears and insecurities.

No matter where they come from or how long they stay, these childhood "heroes" leave lasting impressions. We wouldn't be where we are now if not for their compassion, understanding and inspiring life lessons.

* Jake and Brad are composite characters.

Simply put, mentoring is the gift of time for another - it's being willing to open up your heart, share a piece of your life, and lend a hand to a youngster who might not have a chance otherwise.

Why is mentoring important?

Given the right support, a child whose life has veered off-course can blossom into the confident, caring person s/he was meant to be. In fact, more than a few mentees grow up to be wonderful mentors themselves. They know how it feels to receive, and they want to share their own experience with others.

That's the beauty of mentoring. It doesn't stop with the person you helped; there's a ripple effect. Remember the movie Pay It Forward? Whatever good you do for someone else inspires them by example to do the same. As each receiver repeats this pattern with others, their actions create an endless domino effect that goes on and on.

And here's the bonus: It's not only the mentee that benefits - no siree! In any mentoring partnership, both receiver and giver will see gains - whether in new experiences, increased confidence, an ongoing friendship or simply the satisfaction of knowing you've made a difference. As a mentor, you'll soon see positive changes created through your gift of time and dedication - and what an awesome gift back that is!

In truth, when a youth at risk is mentored, the whole community benefits - the family, the school, even local businesses. Confident, productive and well-rounded young people are an asset to any community!

What does it take to be a mentor?

Mentors can be anyone and everyone - and that includes you! All it takes is the decision to do it. Are you looking for a new adventure? Up for a challenge? Would you like to share your experiences and make a difference in someone's life? If you answer yes to any of these questions, mentoring may be just the ticket for you.

"But I'm no hero!" you argue, "I'm just an ordinary person - what can I offer anyone?" It's true that Superman exists only in fiction, but everyday heroes live right here in our community - and in your neighborhood. They might not wear blue tights and soar over skyscrapers, but they do have the "hero" qualities that count. In a great mentor, you'll find:

%u2022 An upbeat, positive approach to life, and a genuine fondness for children
%u2022 Flexibility, openness, and a non-judgmental attitude
%u2022 An adventurous spirit and a sense of fair play
%u2022 Confidence and a strong belief in self
%u2022 Great communication skills, plus plenty of patience and tact
%u2022 Moral courage and an ability to inspire
%u2022 Compassion, empathy and a genuine desire to help
%u2022 Playfulness and a sense of fun
%u2022 The belief that they have something to give
%u2022 Time - and the desire to share it

Do you see any of these qualities in yourself? If so, consider that mentoring might be a rewarding opportunity for you too!

What exactly does a mentor do?

Mentors are friends, teachers, coaches, role models and more. If this sounds like a daunting responsibility, remember that it's really not. Mentoring simply means helping a youngster make better choices on the road to becoming the best person s/he can be.

This might include listening when they're going through a rough patch, and being supportive as they struggle to resist harmful temptations. It might mean guiding them as they learn how to handle confrontations in a more constructive way. Sometimes it means encouraging them to recognize - and nurture - their own strengths and talents.

By doing so, mentors provide youth in need with new opportunities, build their trust, improve their social skills and enhance their self-worth. Life lessons happen in the midst of any activity, and if you're spending time with a child, these lessons simply become part of their experience. Why not give it a try?

One thing's for certain: As a mentor, you will invariably make a lasting and positive impact on a young person's life.

Can you think of anything more satisfying than that?