Tao of Dating for Men

Review of The Tao of Dating by Alex Benzer

When it comes to self-help books, I'm pretty skeptical. There's so much new-age, be-a-sensitive-guy, Dr. Phil-type junk out there, that it all seems rather silly. How can you improve yourself when you're losing your confidence as a provider, a protector, a MAN? We men want to learn how to attract women, not how to become domesticated pansies!

Fortunately, there's one book out there that's all about self-improvement, female attraction, AND being a man. That book is The Tao of Dating, by Dr. Alex Benzer.

The Tao of Dating ReviewWhat I like about The Tao of Dating most is its practical, positive messages towards self-improvement. Dr. Benzer doesn't want you to just "get girls"; he wants you to GROW and DEVELOP in the process of attracting women: stop blaming other people for your failures, realize that the only person who can prevent you from attracting women is yourself, unleashing the power of a man who believes in himself. The author doesn't want you to just learn a few tricks to manipulate a woman into going home with you; he wants to understand how to attract women: why carrying certain beliefs will turn women off, and why certain behaviors and attitudes will turn them on!

What you learn is the tao, or "way," of the man who has no limits. He's not just teaching you attraction; he's teaching UNLIMITED POWER that comes from within. The book is very empowering: It teaches you that YOU and you alone are responsible for your success. Don't blame women, don't blame your friends, don't blame your parents, don't even blame yourself! There is only one person who can create your success, and that person is YOU. If you get rid of your negative, self-pity energy Dr. Benzer shows you how to unleash that inner power that women love.

The Tao of Dating teaches some truly fascinating principles based on the original Tao, but does not get caught up in fancy-name terms that are big on form but short on substance (like some dating gurus out there!). These principles and concepts actually mean something, and can be applied to whatever goal you want: making more money, being better at sports, starting your own business, whatever. The centerpiece of The Tao is the BE-DO-HAVE philosophy: be the person you want to be by adopting the attitudes and beliefs of success; do the things that successful people do (imitate success); and have the results that successful men have. This, to me, is amazing: it says that you don't have to look like James Bond, to be like James Bond! If you want to be a smooth-talking ladies man, just adopt the attitudes, styles, and behaviors of success. Dr. Benzer helps you do that with real, easily-applied exercises throughout the book.

But attitudes and beliefs are not the only things Dr. Benzer discusses. Far from it! He gives EXCELLENT information on female interaction: recognizing her body language and tonality signals (the 93% of communication that doesn't involve talking!), how to use small requests ("Would you keep an eye on my seat?") to achieve bigger requests ("Would you like to come upstairs?"), and the five methods of being compelling. There's also a GREAT section that's very easy to understand on ANCHORING: evoking desired states of emotion and "emotionally supercharging your encounters with women." Basically, he teaches that the difference between a winning interaction and a losing one is the amount of emotions you can arouse in women. Using some REALLY interesting techniques that Dr. Alex describes with precision, you can evoke emotions in women ON DEMAND. If a woman can connect positive emotional states with your company, "she will then feel good and over time come to associate that good feeling with your company." Think about it: If she's feeling good around you, what's to stop her from going home, even falling in love, with you? VERY powerful stuff!

Additionally, Dr. Benzer takes you through the approach, setting up the first date (which should be easy if you apply his principles), and moving from a first date to relationships and beyond. It's important to learn the inner game principles before you go out and hit on girls, because learning the attitudes, beliefs, and self-empowering principles of success makes it SO much easier. Anyone can up to a girl and start talking, but wouldn't you rather start a conversation knowing you're using human-interaction principles that actually WORK? I know that I would have achieved much more success when I was first attracting women if I knew my goal was to evoke emotions, and that teasing and leaving her wanting more does just that. You can't lose by trying this stuff out; actually, you can only win and become a person who knows no limits to achievement.

Do yourself a big favor and try out The Tao of Dating now. Hey, like Dr. Alex says, life is about choices, right? Choose to succeed, or choose to do the same old, same old. Personally, I prefer to grow and develop in my pursuit of excellence. That's why I'm so glad I picked up The Tao of Dating.