Top Ten Things Men Do To Annoy Women
What do women want in a man?
We're not talking about basic traits here. No, that would be too easy. Instead, we're going to have a look at the top ten things that men do to annoy women.
Being a guy, I'm hardly qualified to create this lens on my own. So, in the spirit of fairness, I went to my wife and her work friends at Waterloo Region Housing. I explained what I wanted to accomplish, and they JUMPED at the chance to bash their guys. Hell, I practically gave them permission, which probably led to hours of woman-to-woman banter.
In the end, I was given several pages of things that men do to annoy women. I then compiled that list and came up with this top ten list.
Keep in mind that this lens is tongue in cheek. No two guys are alike, although after reading through the lists, I have to admit that it seems as if a lot of us are very, very similar. I probably do half the things (my wife would surely say that I do much, much more) mentioned on this list.
Perhaps, something good will come from this list. Not only will we get to laugh at the obvious stereotypes contained within this lens, but maybe...just maybe...the guys will learn about the things that drive their significant other's up the wall.
For the women, maybe they'll see that we can't really help it. I mean, we now have a built in excuse to grunt, fart, drink beer and let loose our manly side! Every other guy does, right?
Don't forget to rate this lens if you like it. I sincerely hope you have some fun, chuckle and enjoy this lens as much as I did creating it.
Let's get started shall we!
We're not talking about basic traits here. No, that would be too easy. Instead, we're going to have a look at the top ten things that men do to annoy women.
Being a guy, I'm hardly qualified to create this lens on my own. So, in the spirit of fairness, I went to my wife and her work friends at Waterloo Region Housing. I explained what I wanted to accomplish, and they JUMPED at the chance to bash their guys. Hell, I practically gave them permission, which probably led to hours of woman-to-woman banter.
In the end, I was given several pages of things that men do to annoy women. I then compiled that list and came up with this top ten list.
Keep in mind that this lens is tongue in cheek. No two guys are alike, although after reading through the lists, I have to admit that it seems as if a lot of us are very, very similar. I probably do half the things (my wife would surely say that I do much, much more) mentioned on this list.
Perhaps, something good will come from this list. Not only will we get to laugh at the obvious stereotypes contained within this lens, but maybe...just maybe...the guys will learn about the things that drive their significant other's up the wall.
For the women, maybe they'll see that we can't really help it. I mean, we now have a built in excuse to grunt, fart, drink beer and let loose our manly side! Every other guy does, right?
Don't forget to rate this lens if you like it. I sincerely hope you have some fun, chuckle and enjoy this lens as much as I did creating it.
Let's get started shall we!
Click or Scroll. It's Totally Up To You.
- #10: The Sucky Syndrome
- #9: Sherlock Bone...Head
- #8: The P.P. (Procrastinating Prince)
- #7: Laundry Basket Bozo
- #6: The Dine and Dash
- Commercial Break
- Look Here First Though...
- Now Add Your Own Peeve to the List! Keep it Clean Please...
- #5: Trail of Trash
- #4: The Yellow Throne
- #3: The Calender Clutz
- #2: The Double-D-Dunce
- #1: In the Zone
- How Has The Human Race Survived Up Until Now?
- Want to keep laughing?
- Please Leave a Comment
#10: The Sucky Syndrome
Coming in at number ten on the list is the dreaded sucky syndrome. According to the ladies, guys are nearly helpless when they're sick.Okay, we're nearly helpless all the time, but according to women, men suddenly turn into diaper toting babies as soon as we sniffle.
What's worse is that men expect to do absolutely NOTHING when they're sick, while women are still expected to carry on as usual if the situation is reversed. Men will take a nasty fall off a motorcycle, walk away with their knee cap torn off and declare to the world that they'll be fine, but as soon as flu season comes around, we begin to snivel and whine like the average toddler who's had their favourite toy taken away.
Shame on us.
#9: Sherlock Bone...Head
Men go to the kitchen, open the fridge and before they've even glanced inside, they're yelling out, "Honey, where's the ketchup!"The woman is shaking her head, and every muscle in her body is crying out for some throttling action. Apparently, not only are we helpless when we're sick, but we can't find anything when we're functioning normally.
Not that I would know. I NEVER do this. Honest.
Multiple women confessed that this is one of the biggest things a guy can do to annoy them. We lose things, can't find things and make a mess of things while hunting for other things. It's a huge problem, and someone has GOT to do something about it!
I mean, these poor women are being constantly annoyed by our inability to locate our possessions. How many minutes of 'Oprah' and 'American Idol' are being wasted trying to help their men folk find their things? It's madness I tell you. Sheer and utter chaos!
Yet, there is a silver lining. No matter how bad it seems, we can ALWAYS find the remote control.
Amen.
#8: The P.P. (Procrastinating Prince)
Women hate the way their guys like to procrastinate. They ask us to deal with a problem, project, chore or situation and we say we will. The only problem is that we don't say WHEN we'll do it, and in most cases, that date is a long way down the road.Is it because we're lazy? Are men that forgetful?
I'm going to let you in on a little secret ladies. And no, this isn't from personal experience. I'm a good guy, and whenever my wife asks me to do something I immediately jump to attention, salute, sing God Save the Queen, and by gosh, I get right at it.
But I have heard OTHER guys talking.
It's not that we forget. We procrastinate because we don't want to do it. There might be a game on or a TV show we want to see. Hell, we might want to nap, play poker, look at Victoria Secret, belch out Oh McDonald had a Farm or lay on the couch and swill beer. The point is that there is always something more fun to do.
Sure, we'll get to it eventually. But that's usually after we think our marriage or relationship is in some serious jeopardy. Then you've got a shot at seeing us in action.
#7: Laundry Basket Bozo
According to my super scientific polling, men have some serious issues with laundry. Not one problem either, but a whole freaking whack of them. We leave laundry around the house. Sometimes that laundry is *gasp* just thrown beside the hamper, but not actually in it. It's on the floor beside our beds, in the bathroom and strewn in stinking piles wherever we disrobe.It gets worse.
We also leave our socks in balls, never thinking to unroll them so it's easier for someone to do the laundry. In fact, I'll have to admit to this crime. I think when I'm on my deathbed, my wife will shove a pair of rolled up, dirty ass socks in my mouth in order to finally make her point. The last thing I'll breathe in is the stench of my stale, decaying, rolled up socks.
Laundry was a major factor in my polling. Multiple women had it on their list of peeves, so keep this in mind the next time you fling an article of clothing where it doesn't belong.
#6: The Dine and Dash
Number six is truly a crime against womanity. One woman I polled said: "When he sees me working at tidying up the kitchen after dinner, and there is a lot to do, he doesn't offer to help. I mean, why should I do it all? I work during the day too. Why is it only the woman's duty to tidy up? Why can't he at least offer to dry the dishes or offer to put the dishes away?
No, he goes and sits on the couch to watch TV. I want to relax too. Now my dirty secret is out."
Indeed, Denise, the secret is out. I can feel the estrogen from here. Now, if I were your husband, this sort of thing wouldn't happen. Your kitchen would be immaculately clean. In fact, I would be up and cleaning before you'd even finished eating! That's how ultra-efficient I am.
It's a shame that scientists haven't figured out a way to clone me yet. Womanity would be so much happier. :)
Multiple women pointed out the fact that their husbands and boyfriends are lax when it comes to dish duty. We like to dine and dash, leaving our significant others with the clean up duty. In other words, this is just one of the things that annoy women, but it was repeated time and time again in my polling.
It's time to grab a dish towel guys!
Or the remote control, whatever is easier, I guess...
Commercial Break
Take a breather and continue along to the second portion of man-bashing.
Look Here First Though...
Now Add Your Own Peeve to the List! Keep it Clean Please...
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#5: Trail of Trash
Laundry, dishes and now the trail of trash-is it just me, or does a lot of the things on this list revolve around cleaning?Men have a hard time cleaning up their mess. Not only do we leave a trail of trash wherever we go, but we sometimes leave trash in the weirdest places. For example, we drink a soda, and leave the can on the counter beside the recycling bin or garbage.
As my wife likes to point out, it would take two seconds and very little extra energy to place the garbage in the bin. But no, for some odd reason, a lot of guys (me included) forego that step for the more expedient and less taxing trash trail.
It seems we men are guilty of another crime that isn't based on reason. Obviously our judgement is flawed when it comes to cleaning, and I'm reminded about it...constantly.
#4: The Yellow Throne
The yellow throne is truly disgusting. Women reported that their guys faithfully sprinkle on the toilet seat, and when they sit down to do their business...well...let's just say they get a nasty surprise.I actually had this happen to me a week or so ago. My son got up in the morning to relieve himself, and managed to splatter his urine all over the bottom of the seat. I walked in a few minutes later like a zombie, lifted the seat cover and had quite a shock when I placed my hand in his urine. I started to throw up in my mouth, and I think I scrubbed my hand until it was red and raw.
There's no excuse for this. Not at all.
According to my poll, the damage doesn't stop there, either. Guys splatter the seat, seat cover, floor and anything else that's in the line of fire. We're like untrained puppies on crack! This disturbing behaviour has to stop. So say the women who were kind enough to take my poll.
#3: The Calender Clutz
Number three on our list has been around for as long as guys have been on the planet. Some guys have a hard time remembering dates unless they're tattooed permanently on their foreheads. Anniversaries, birthdays and every other special event usually fly beneath their radar.Nobody has ever been able to figure out why guys have a problem remembering dates. We know we're going to catch hell for it at some point, but it's still beyond our meagre memory powers.
Sorry gals, I doubt this peeve is going to go away in the near future.
#2: The Double-D-Dunce
If you're a guy and you're reading this, you've probably already sat drooling over the picture to the right. Yes, it's true. Guys everywhere are suckers for a nice pair of breasts. I think we're genetically coded to be that way. Nothing escapes our all-seeing eyes.However, some guys do it with class, and some just stare like a dunce.
Women like to be admired for something more than just a nice pair. They don't like it when their mate stops to look over their shoulder at a sexy woman. They don't like it when strangers stare at their chest instead of their eyes when having a conversation. They don't like having to wipe the spittle from their husband's chin every time a woman in a miniskirt and tank top walks by.
Who woulda thunk it, huh?
Guys, if you're going to look (and we all know you will) try to do it with a little bit of class and decorum. Sneak a quick look without being obvious about it, and your woman will be sure to thank you.
#1: In the Zone
You've made it to our number one pick! Congratulations for hanging in there.According to my poll, the number one thing that women want in a man is to have him LISTEN to her. It's as simple as that. But many of the women polled said that their guy only half listened or zoned out all together, which pisses them off, to say the least.
I admit to doing this. My wife tells me a story and it seems to go on and on until my eyes start to water. It's the small details, really. I don't care about the small details, I just want the basics. Give it to me in bullet points, baby! By the time she's figured out the name of the girl she used to hang out with in high school, with short brown hair, who was dating Brad at the time...well, I don't care anymore. Just give me the good parts and leave out the rest.
I do zone out from time to time. I try not to, but sometimes it's impossible. It's not that I don't care about her; it's that the story needs to be condensed into Maneese. For example:
-Girl I knew in high school
-she dated two guys at once
-one night, she was making out with the one guy
-and the other guy walked in
-man was he pissed!
-There was a scrap, and she ended up hitting the second guy over the head with a frying pan
-blood, pain, near death experience for him
-dumped them both the next day
-moved on to guy #3
-END TRANSMISSION
If I have any questions after that, you'll be sure to hear from me. I'll get my people to talk to your people. In the meantime, that's enough information for me. You managed to hold my interest, and I didn't zone out.
How Has The Human Race Survived Up Until Now?
Want to keep laughing?
Visit these tongue-in-cheek lenses
Please Leave a Comment
I'd love to hear your thoughts.
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chrissmiller133
May 22, 2012 @ 3:52 am | delete
- I couldn't agree more and please note that I'm a man :)) What can I say, we don't really do it on purpose, but if it works once, we keep trying our luck and women seem to just resign. Who said it's easy to make relationships work?
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cricandcric1557
May 4, 2012 @ 1:48 am | delete
- It's been great time to read your lens, really informative thanks keep it up.
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What women want
Feb 20, 2012 @ 5:44 pm | delete
- Very well written lens,very interesting points
For more on What women want
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thesuccess
Jan 31, 2012 @ 5:09 pm | delete
- Wasn't Jack in Titanic the perfect romantic partner?
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DebMartin
Jan 15, 2012 @ 2:19 pm | delete
- Thanks for the laugh!
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Lifeboost
Jan 13, 2012 @ 2:18 am | delete
- Another Excellent lens from you! Love your writing! Blessed by a Squid Angel. :)
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nicemop
Dec 15, 2011 @ 1:01 pm | delete
- Interesting lens. Good ideas, thanks for sharing.
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laundry baskets
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John Howard
Nov 14, 2011 @ 8:38 pm | delete
- Such a good information. Women has its own likes on how does the relationship goes on. But the guy still be the one will take control the relationship. Like me, I am treating my wife like a queen and I am always doing things for her that will make her feel how special she is for me. Mostly, I am asking her for a date. Dating is also a good way on understanding woman's feeling.
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Ted
Nov 8, 2011 @ 7:33 pm | delete
- This is so true! Can't stop laughing when I started reading #9. I really love my honey. After a number of years dating, we decided we were good partners.
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Othercat
Apr 3, 2011 @ 3:16 am | delete
- These are all funny, but sadly, true. My biggest pet peeve is when my husband makes a sandwich. He'll leave the fridge door open, with the open bread on the counter, along with open jars of mayo and mustard, sliced ham hanging halfway out of the package, and cheese wrappers. And when he's done eating (in front of the tv, of course) he sets his plate on the coffee table and forgets about it. Sometimes I feel like I'm married to a 5 year old.
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by MikeMoore
I'm in love with the written word. My main passions are reading and writing, although I have many more.
I'm also the father of two beautiful children...
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