Top 10 Best Noses in Film and Television (and song)

Poor old Gonzo - his nose remains his most noteworthy feature. For 5 series of The Muppet Show it gets bashed, broken, blown up, and used as a handle to pick him up and throw him. No matter how hard he tries, his feature stunt performances always end up in humiliation and pain (and often a broken nose!). You have to admire his bravery and perseverance though, and you gotta admit - he does a nice song every now and then. Here he is singing Buck Owens' "Act Naturally."

The villain of the 1969 children's television series "H.R.Pufnstuf", Witchiepoo - or Wilhelmina W. Witchiepoo, to be precise - was in every way the classic cackling witch. With flowing robes, pointed black hat, and bizarre sidekick (who almost qualifies for a place in this list in her own right), she flew above Living Island on her Vroom Broom, screeching and shrieking and waving her wand, and kidnapping young Jimmy so she could steal his magic flute. It was the nose that set her apart from ordinary witches, however. It was magnificent - long, crooked and pointy with the obligatory wart, it dominated her whole existence and lifted the character from mere pantomime villain to psychedelic nightmare.

Ridiculed not because of his large nose - that's to be expected for an elephant - but for his oversized ears, Dumbo is the classic story of the outsider who overcomes adversity with the help of an inspirational friend and becomes a hero. A lovely story, and a lovely film from Disney, Dumbo's nose belongs here because what nose list is complete without at least one elephant?

Fred Schepisi's 1987 film "Roxanne" is based on the 1897 play "Cyrano De Bergerac", by Edmond Rostand. In it, Steve Martin plays local fire chief C.D. Bales - a popular man whose unusually large nose has gotten in the way (so to speak) of romance. In the You Tube scene below, his nose is insulted by a bore in a bar, so he launches into his 20 nose jokes routine in a sustained masterpiece of self deprecating and ultimately disarming humour. This nose belongs in the countdown not only for its size and its importance to the story, but also for Martin's virtuoso performance with a proboscis as a co-star.

Along with his roommate Ernie, Bert has become a Sesame Street icon, as well as half of one of the best known comedy duos on television. Performed by the great Frank Oz for over 30 years, Bert is President of the National Association of W Lovers - an association for people who love the letter W - and also collects paper clips. Although his nose is not famous for its own sake, it has become one of his most prominent features due to its treatment by his offsider, Ernie - usually by way of its removal in one way or another.

"There are children here somewhere. I can smell them." In the land of Vulgaria where children are forbidden by the Baron and Baroness Bomburst, this horrid creep is employed to find, capture, and remove them. Although ostensibly a classic pantomime comic villain, there is nothing at all funny about this man or what he does. Even without his long, child smelling nose he would be awful, but the man voted scariest villain in children's literature in a BBC poll has sniffed his way into the nightmares of several generations of children with his repugnant proboscis. He also appears in my lens Top 10 Scary Scenes in Non-Horror Movies at number 2.

The second witch in our countdown, Samantha Stevens (played by Elizabeth Montgomery) is here not her for her nose per se, but for what it can do. She uses her nose to cast spells, against the wishes of her advertising executive husband Darren (Dick York). When Darren is not looking, she twitches her nose and conjures up all manner of things - a houseful of servants, a new dress, or anything else she thinks necessary. Funnily enough, if you look closely when she twiches her nose, you will notice that it is, in fact, her top lip that she twitches, not her nose. The effect is the same, however, and a whole generation of fans remember Samantha (and her infant, half witch daughter Tabitha) for the magic nose.

Pinocchio's nose is one of the most famous in the world. It grows when he tells lies, and has become immortalised through books, films, stage productions, and songs. The most well known of all of these is Walt Disney's classic animated film of 1940, listed at number 2 in the American Film Institute's Top Ten animated films (after another Disney classic - Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs). The nose nobody wants, but everybody knows comes in at number 3 in our countdown.

Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer is the subject of a story and a song, both written in 1939 by Robert L May, an employee of the Montgomery Ward department store. Popularised through Gene Autry's 1949 recording of the song, Rudolph and his nose have become an enduring Christmas icon around the world, and are as much a part of childrens' Christmas Eve tradition of leaving out drinks and snacks for Santa as the jolly red fellow himself. Laughed at by the other reindeer for his shiny red nose, Rudolph is a bit of an outcast until Santa realises that his nose can light the way for his sleigh as he travels through the night sky making his deliveries. Rudolph becomes a hero with the other reindeer, and has remained one for children ever since. His nose comes in at number 2 on our countdown - narrowly beating out Pinocchio as the most famous and popular nose.

At number 1 on our list is the wonderful Jimmy Durante. Jazz musician, comedian, film star, pianist, singer, radio personality, television star, and humanitarian, Durante remains one of the best loved and most imitated personalities of the 20th century. The only real nose on a real person to make this countdown, Durante's nose (or schnozz, as he called it) is here with the greatest respect for a man who made more jokes about his own large nose than any of the countless comedians and impressionists who have imitated him over several decades. In fact, this is the reason it seems appropriate to include him on this list - he always got in first with his own nose jokes, disarming any attempt by others to poke fun at him (see the Roxanne clip at number 7 for a fictional example of this).
In the 1947 movie "It Happened in Brooklyn", Durante tells Frank Sinatra during the song "Sing From the Heart":

Jimmy Durante: "Why only last year the kids asked me to sing at their graduation exercises.I did, but I made a ghastly mistake. I didn't sing from the heart, I sang from the nose."
Sinatra "Well, how did it sound?"
Jimmy Durante "I don't know. The note hasn't come out yet." (See You Tube clip below)

and he once said to Bob Hope: "When it comes to noses, you're a retailer. I'm a wholesaler."

Although he made fun of himself - to the point where he is now perhaps remembered more for his nose than for his many other talents - Durante never made fun of other people's appearance. When talking of his childhood and being teased at school for his looks, he said:

"I'd go home and cry. I made up my mind never to hurt anybody else, no matter what. I never made jokes about anybody's big ears, crossed eyes, or their stuttering." (Wikiquote)

This personal integrity, coupled with his warmth and humanity, endeared Jimmy Durante to several generations of Americans and around the world. His compassion for others is perhaps best illustrated by his long term commitment to The Fraternal Order of Eagles, a charitable organisation that raises money for handicapped and abused children. For many years he performed at the order's conventions, refusing all offers of fees or expenses. So grateful was the order that they re-named their children's fund as The Jimmy Durante Children's Fund in his honour.
By the time of his death on January 29th, 1980, Durante's career had spanned 6 decades. During that time he had performed with many of the major stars of his time, won a 1952 Emmy Award for Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy Series, and become a much loved household name. He is referenced and imitated in countless television shows, films, songs, and comedy routines. His famous catchphrases - of which there are many - are used and quoted in everything from The Simpsons to the Powerpuff Girls, from 42nd St to Sesame St, and many others besides.
Jimmy Durante was a true star; an all round entertainer who linked the generations from vaudeville, to speakeasy and concert hall, then on to radio, film, and television, seeming at home in all of them.
Goodnight Mr Durante, wherever you are.