A tribute to my Mami

She was born in year 1942 in the midle of 2nd World war in small vilage Colnisce in one of the fomer Yugoslavia republic, Slovenia. Her mother was a house wife and mother of two children... my mother Juliana and one year younger brother Viki. Her father worked in cole mine. In those times our country wasn't rich, because in World war II a lot of buildings and factories was damaged by nacists,so most people lived poor conutry life.

Even as a child she had a great talent for painting, but because of sitation in her family, she must go to work in factory immediately after she finished Elementary school at age 15 and worked there since her retirement.
Soon she meet my father and at age 22 they married.

Unfortunately their marriage was't happy. My father was an alcoholic and very aggressive man. He beat her and me and my sister too. Somethimes he beat her so much, that we must take her to hospital, but she did't dear to tell anybody to help her. Those was different times... unless in our country. So she suffered from the tyranny of him and prayed that he won't beat one uf us too much. I never understood, why we must to endure this, but she always has some excuses about him.
Must beautifull times was, when we were home alone, and she told me fairytailes, sang songs, we draw a lot and just be careless. But in her head I know there always was some fear what will be, when he come home. I really can't remember one day, which passed without violence, at least mental. They weren't happy and all because of alcohol!

I wasn't a happy child neither :(

All of my childhood she was't healthy. When I was 10, I came from school and she lay in a pool of blood... I was scared that she is dead, but she ask me to get an ambulance to take her to hospital. They diagnosed tumor in the ovaries and uterus and she had surgery. Next major disease was six years latter, cancer of the thyroid gland. And finally at age 50. doctors detected a brain tumor. It was so hard to hear that your mother won't be long, i just could't belive. They operate her, she has a chemotherapy, and it seems that she is ok. But uggly spider was still growing in her head and two years latter she had another surgery.

During that time my father died because of alcohol and I got pregnant. Those was hard times for me, because I was rather young at age 21 and didn't know, how to handle all those things. After the second surgery she was no longer responsive and so I must take care of my baby and my mom, which was practically a plant. She can't talk, move, eat,nothing... She only lay there and look at me by appealing eyes, but she can't do nothing. It so hard to watch your beloved one in that situation, but i could't do nothing but care her,alleviate pain and love her. She practicly didn't see my little boy and she could't hold him, tell him stories, sing songs,... She couldn't do anything... just wait that her time will came. And it came... after 6 months after second surgery... she died.

This is one of her favorit flowers was Voscenka - HoyaBella...

A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie.
~Tenneva Jordan
The heart of a mother is a deep abyss at the bottom of which you will always find forgiveness.
~Honoré de Balzac
A mom's hug lasts long after she lets go.
~Author Unknown
There's nothing like a mama-hug.
~Terri Guillemets
Most of all the other beautiful things in life come by twos and threes, by dozens and hundreds. Plenty of roses, stars, sunsets, rainbows, brothers and sisters, aunts and cousins, comrades and friends - but only one mother in the whole world.
~Kate Douglas Wiggin

Angels please tell my Mami, that I wish her a Happy Birthday... I LOVE YOU.

Photo credit

A mom's hug lasts long after she lets go. ~Author Unknown

I still feel the touch of your arms and hear your smile... I know that you are with me somewhere... somehow, so just want to wish you Happy Women's day!

I will always love you Mami...