Abuse, Advocacy, and Recovery Lensography

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Advocacy and Abuse Recovery Resources

When we were kids, we believed in overnight change. We just knew that we would go to sleep a silly old nine year-old and wake up a new, mature, and somehow totally different ten year-old.

There was that one event that would change our life, make us cooler, make us smarter, make everything different. As we grow up we lose that belief in magic, we begin to lose that faith in miracles.

As adults, change is HARD. It is scary, it is frightening, it is uncomfortable. Change takes work. Change means overcoming obstacles that sometimes seem insurmountable.

As hard as it seems, change is worth it.

I've done many lenses on abuse, advocacy, and recovery. I have offered resources where I can, suggestions, and lessons I learned along the way. A Lensography is simply a way of putting all of those links in one single place.

So if you came here looking for help, I certainly hope I have something you can use. Feel free to drop me a line with specific questions, and I will do my best to answer either in private or through a lens here on Squidoo.

Just remember, you aren't alone and you can do it!

Advocacy, Awareness, and Inspiration

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Survivor Stories

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Baby Steps

Life Magazine




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Framed   Mounted

I know a woman who works with children who have suffered abuse. Her specialty is art therapy. I didn't really understand how drawing a picture or sculpting clay could help a child heal.

She explained that identities are very important to children; they take them very seriously without even realizing it. These children walked into her office wearing the label of "victim" but, she said, an amazing thing happened after a few visits with her.

Through their artwork she first helped them express feelings they had no other way to express, then slowly the self-image in their heads began to change. They began walking out of her office with a new label, the label of "artist."

I thought of a child walking out of her office clutching their latest artwork to their chest and finally understood what she was doing. She can't take the pain away. She can't make the horrible incidents disappear from their memory. What she can do is flood the negative with something else, something positive.

Identities are just as important to adults. Small changes in our lives can reap huge rewards, because they change the way we look at ourselves. We don't always realize how important those labels are, where they came from, or even that they exist in the first place.

We tell ourselves so many negative things, that we are fat, ugly, stupid, talentless. Whatever it is, those labels do not help us in any way. They hold us down, hold us back, and keep us from becoming the person we were meant to be.

Next time you find yourself issuing a negative self-evaluation, stop and remember that child making their baby steps towards recovery. Flood yourself with positive.

Label your emotions, but not yourself.

Changing Perspective

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A New Person

Golden Sable II




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There are many different ways to change your life, but only one person can really take the steps that must be taken. Nobody can do it for you; you have to find that strength inside of yourself to take the first step.

There are many people out there who are willing to help you make the changes you would like to make, often the first and hardest step is just asking for that help. There is no shame in asking, it is not a sign of weakness.

It takes more courage than most people realize to simply admit that you can't do it alone.

Surviving abuse of any kind has the same basic steps: it is a change in self-image, a change in perspective, a change in the way we see the world, and a change in the way we see ourselves.

It doesn't happen all at once, most of the time you don't even notice the changes as they are happening. You change one perception, then another, then another... your self-image begins to change, the world around you begins to change, and slowly you realize you have become a new person.

You notice things you never noticed before, you see yourself in a different light. You see a new, brighter person in there. Someone with potential and possibility. Someone who really does deserve to live a happy life.

We all deserve to be happy, we all deserve to be whole.

Creating a New You!

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No More Negativity

Life Magazine




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You don't need any of the latest self-help or success trends to change your life, not really. In most cases they are saying the exact same thing in very different ways.

Remove all of the mysticism, aliens, manifestations, and pop-culture jargon, and they are all simply teaching you that the easiest way to change your world is to change the way you see it.

"The intellect can only absorb what the emotions will allow..."
Haim G. Ginott

Your mind really does control your reality. If you are a negative person, you will seek out and find negative. If you are looking for something to take offense to or complain about, you will always find it. If you are expecting bad things to happen in your life, bad things will happen.

Negative people create negative energy, there is nothing magical about this statement. Like will always breed like. Some people just seem to suck the energy out of everyone they come into contact with.

In order to become a positive person you have to think positive. You have to find positive in everything and everyone you come into contact with. You have to expect positive things, speak positive things, and believe positive things.

The more negativity you allow into your life, the more negative you will become. It isn't easy to think positive when you have a lot of negative people and events in your past, but keep your focus on the positive and you will slowly find your way to the land of the positive thinkers.

Putting Yourself in a Positive Place

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The Right Tools

We Can Do It! (Rosie the Riveter)




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It is hard to do a professional job without the right tools. It doesn't matter what your profession is, tools are often an essential part of doing a job right.

That is one of the biggest problems with being human: most of us don't have the proper tools to deal with difficult situations that arise in life. There are a set of tools for relationships, a set of tools for proper self-care, and a set of tools for dealing with others.

Most of us just keep struggling to cope using only the tools we have been given; we aren't even aware of the tools that are available.

Education is one of the most powerful tools we have at our disposal.

Tools for Your Life

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Never Give up!

Les Saisons




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Framed   Mounted

Life is not concrete. Just because something seems a certain way right now does not mean it will remain that way forever. Life is very much a roller coaster, there will be ups and there will be downs.

But just as we can be assured that the seasons will change in due time, so too can we be assured that being on the downswing only means we are heading back up again.

Good luck in all you do, and never, ever give up! A better life is just around the corner!

P.S. This is a Rocketmoms lens

More great lensographies!

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Your comments mean a lot!

Thank you for taking the time to read and comment on my lens. I hope you were able to take something useful away from here!

  • miaponzo Apr 19, 2011 @ 4:27 am | delete
    To survive you need to always remain optimistic and positive.. and accept that things were meant to be the way they are, even if they don't make sense.
  • adhd-bipolar-depression Jan 26, 2011 @ 4:29 am | delete
    A better life certainly is just around the corner!
  • Gloriousconfusion Dec 18, 2010 @ 3:36 pm | delete
    This is a lovely, comforting lens and I am featuring it in my new lens Teflon Tony - a Poem, as it is about relationships
  • sandyspider Aug 4, 2009 @ 6:08 pm | delete
    Very nice!
  • 0ctavias0fferings Aug 3, 2009 @ 10:26 am | delete
    Excellent lens and terrific resources. Lensrolling to my Child Abuse lens. 5*
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Boshemia

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by

boshemia

I am a writer of fiction and of fact, a free-thinker, and true Bohemian. Author of Sister, Survivor, and a certified victim's advocate and abuse survivor... more »

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