Victoria Wood's Acorn Antiques

Miss Babs (Celia Imrie): The overwrought and lovelorn owner of Acorn Antiques, who moves from one 'crisis' to another. Opens each episode on the phone introducing a never again mentioned plotline. Wife of Mr Kenneth, who was himself never seen on screen - mother of unnamed triplets (and, we discover in one episode, Trixie Trouble). Her torrid romances are hinted at but never seen. Distinguishing features include a birthmark shaped like a moped.

Miss Berta (Victoria Wood): A partner in the business who begins the series emerging from intensive care to discover that her murdered father has been seen in the post office. She later develops amnesia and gets married to Clifford before discovering that she is not only the twin sister of Derek, but also the daughter of Mrs Overall, and the mother of an unnamed baby. In the musical version, Berta is revealed to be Babs's sister: both siblings are the daughters of Mrs Overall.

Clifford (Duncan Preston): The stolid, reliable leading man whose advances are rejected by Babs. Shortly afterwards he reveals he has married Miss Berta, who is suffering from amnesia. Mr Clifford's voice mirrors that of David Hunter, sometime shareholder of the Crossroads Motel. In the musical, it is revealed that Mr Clifford's father knew of the paternity of the triplets, since he had sheltered the pregnant Mrs Overall, one rainy night.

Mrs Overall (Julie Walters): The elderly tealady, who believes all problems can be solved with a nice cup of tea, a macaroon and an anecdote. She is revealed to be the sole beneficiary of Berta's father's will, and mother of Miss Berta and Derek. The rather grand actress who "plays" Mrs Overall (Bo Beaumont) was a former lover of Lord Delfont. According to Wood, the character of Mrs Overall was inspired by Mrs Mack in Take the High Road (overall being a deliberate pun on mac) and Amy Turtle in Crossroads (originally played by Ann George).

Trixie (Rosie Collins): Also known as Trixie Trouble, a fiesty, tarty femme fatale who works in the antiques packing department, until she discovers she is Miss Babs' daughter. After her off-screen marriage to Bobby she mentions having had jaundice, 'lots of' extra-marital relationships (which may have included Derek, with whom she was in a car crash), and is seduced by her mother's cousin Jerez, shortly before she briefly runs away to Morocco with Derek. She returns to become a nun, and later a Mother Superior.

Derek (Kenny Ireland): The handyman, and revealed latterly as Miss Berta's twin brother and Mrs Overall's other child. A long running affair with Miss Babs is hinted at and is briefly rekindled when his unseen girlfriend Marie-Therese Francine Dubois runs off, but this is interrupted by Trixie, with whom he also seems to have a relationship. He and Trixie later announce that they are 'travelling overland to Morocco' to find Trixie some nice jumpsuits. It is also mentioned that he and Clifford are secretly playing the accordion and the ukelele together. Derek is based on the character Benny from Crossroads. Kenny Ireland says he is still remembered best for his regular part in As Seen On TV. "Twenty-odd years ago I played Derek the handyman in Acorn Antiques. To this day, nice camp waiters quote my dialogue at me, and are slightly disappointed that I don't remember any of the lines."

Cousin Jerez (Peter Ellis): The foreign villain of the series, and previously unmentioned Spanish cousin of Miss Babs, who makes a rejected offer to buy the shop. Undaunted, he disguises himself as a postman to misdirect mail which would have warned Babs of a new motorway to be built nearby. His plans are thwarted by Clifford, but not before he has attempted to seduce Trixie. He later returns, completely reformed, while on his way to begin a sandwich course in computers at Fuengerola Polytechnic, and gives Babs £25,000, thus conveniently solving a cashflow problem at the shop.

Extras (Albert Welch & Michaela Welch): The only customers to appear in the entire series. An elderly couple who appear at the beginning of every episode, looking at an antique and leaving the shop.