My Child Has Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder & Does Not Take ADHD Medication ... So What!

THIS IS A DEFINITION OF ADHD FROM CDC.GOV

ADHD is one of the most common neurobehavioral disorders of childhood and can persist through adolescence and into adulthood. Currently the causes are unknown.

FamilyA person with ADHD has a chronic level of inattention, impulsive hyperactivity, or both such that daily functioning is compromised. The symptoms of the disorder must be present at levels that are higher than expected for a person's developmental stage and must interfere with the person's ability to function in different settings (e.g., in school and at home). A person with ADHD may struggle in important areas of life, such as peer and family relationships, and school or work performance.

THIS IS THE DEFINITION FROM KIDSHEALTH.ORG

ADHD is a common behavioral disorder that affects an estimated 8% to 10% of school-age children. Boys are about three times more likely than girls to be diagnosed with it, though it's not yet understood why.

Kids with ADHD act without thinking, are hyperactive, and have trouble focusing. They may understand what's expected of them but have trouble following through because they can't sit still, pay attention, or attend to details.

Of course, all kids (especially younger ones) act this way at times, particularly when they're anxious or excited. But the difference with ADHD is that symptoms are present over a longer period of time and occur in different settings. They impair a child's ability to function socially, academically, and at home. The good news is that with proper treatment, kids with ADHD can learn to successfully live with and manage their symptoms.

THIS IS THE DEFINITION FROM SCIENCE-EDUCATION.NIH.GOV

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD): A mental illness characterized by an impaired ability to regulate activity level (hyperactivity), attend to tasks (inattention), and inhibit behavior (impulsivity). For a diagnosis of ADHD, the behaviors must appear before an individual reaches age seven, continue for at least six months, be more frequent than in other children of the same age, and cause impairment in at least two areas of life (school, home, work, or social function).

AS A PARENT OF A CHILD WITH ADHD THE SECOND DEFINITION DOES NOT SET RIGHT WITH ME, BUT THIS IS TRUE. THERE ARE CERTAIN "BEHAVIORS" THAT WE CANNOT IGNORE WITH CHILDREN THAT HAVE ATTENTION DEFICIT HYPERACTIVITY DISORDER (ADHD)

"ADHD can't be cured, but it can be successfully managed ... In most cases, ADHD is best treated with a combination of medication and behavior therapy. ~KidsHealth.org"

ADHD IS NOT A RESULT OF THE FOLLOWING ...

* Bad parenting
* Too much sugar
* Too little sugar
* Aspartame (brand name: Nutrasweet)
* Food additives or colorings
* Food allergies or other allergies
* Lack of vitamins
* Fluorescent lights
* Too much TV
* Video games

IF ADHD CAN'T BE CURED AND THERE ARE MEDICATIONS AND BEHAVIORAL TREATMENTS - IT IS MORE THAN JUST AN EXCUSE THAT PARENTS USE. ADHD IS REAL TO THE 8% to 12% OF CHILDREN THAT IT AFFECTS.

ADD/ADHD manifests itself in many ways and may vary with the individual. Common symptoms may include, but are not limited to the following.

THE ONES WITH THE EXTRA 2 STARTS RELATE TO MY SON:

* forgetful **
* disorganized **
* distractible **
* defensive/blames others **
* mood swings
* sleep disorder **
* social conflicts
* easily frustrated **
* low self esteem
* immaturity
* impulsive **
* lacks leadership
* often loses things
* may engage in dangerous activities **
* interrupts conversations or drifts **
* off during conversation
* daydreams **
* anxiety
* hyperactivity or fatigue **
* poor reading skills
* reversals of letters and/or numbers (** sometimes)
* poor handwriting **
* poor spelling
* poor math skills

List from Williams Diagnostics

The beginning of this blog states that each child with ADHD is unique, and that parents should follow their "gut instincts" when it comes to what the experts state is "characteristic" and "appropriate" for a child with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. I would like to expand on this a bit by using my child as an example again ...

My child functions at a tolerable and somewhat normal level while visiting friends, family and at home. On the other hand, for the past 5 years, the teachers have always had something different to say. Each time I speak candidly with them, I wonder if not placing my son on medication is hurting him and others that he interacts with on a daily basis. It is extremely difficult to determine because I can not observe him at school and expect to see the same child that they work with on a daily basis. I suppose that I should "break down" why I do not have my child on ADHD medication, so that you understand.

WHY I DO NOT HAVE MY SON ON ADHD MEDICATION

1) He is a happy and intelligent child.

2) He gets excellent grades in school.

3) He has a "leader" personality and friends that follow.

4) He can concentrate to play instruments.

5) He can sit an do homework without a problem.

6) He completes tasks with reminders and rewards.

7) He behaves when we are "out and about".

8) He is a compassionate and loving person.

9) He is very quick to learn and develop on the computer.

10) He is exceptionally creative. This is not so much in terms of aesthetics as it pertains to his ideas regarding innovative designs and enhancement.

I could go on and on. The point being that on the surface, many do not know that my child has ADHD unless they are exposed to his intricacies on a daily basis. This is especially true for those of us who have watched him develop into the person his is now. It has taken and continues to take repetitiveness, tact, behavior modification, support of the school staff, family and friends.

IT HAS TAKEN A LOT OF PATIENCE FROM ALL BECAUSE:

1) He talks excessively unless deeply engaged in play, television, sleep or sick.

2) Although he is much better about cleaning up behind himself, he is still an extremely messy person because he gets distracted while cleaning. Some of this distraction is selective as with any child that does not want to clean, though it is different with a child that has ADHD. They can get just as distracted while preparing to play, too.

3) If he has an issue at school, disagreement with his brother / peer or having a tired day, he will have short outbursts that subside, with space, after 3 to 5 minutes.

4) He has never slept the way that "normal" children do. In fact, until about a year ago, he rarely slept during the night, at all.

5) He has obsessions that are wonderfully interesting, though can be a bit tedious and repetitive, too.

6) He has a lack of social sight that is offset by the obsessive characteristics.

7) He is not typically physically affectionate.

8) Although he is compassionate and most say that he is quite a little charmer, he is very self-centered (literally).

As per #5 and #6, these traits are to the point that I often wonder if he has a tinge of the highest level of Aspergers (a high functioning Autism), too. His teachers say, "no", but I am not sure that this is correct. In fact, I am not the only parent to state that a child with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder displays a combination of traits that are characteristic of children with Autism, Dyslexia and Bipolar. I currently have him my son undergoing neurological testing to confirm that his is just ADHD.

MY CHILD IS NOT 100% THE SAME PERSON AT SCHOOL

On the other hand, my son's teachers have some interesting details to share each time we meet.

1) He has exceptional recollection skills. This means that he does very well in spelling and taking oral tests.

2) His writing is deficient. This is a task that he attempts to avoid and needs constant reminders to complete an assignment and to complete it neatly. He is also much better at writing in cursive / script, than he is at printing.

3) He does not following directions the 1st time and like to negotiate.

4) He knows routines, though struggles with organization.

5) He still does not independently complete assignments.

6) He is occassionally emotional, angry and frustrated to the point that he will "talk back" to the teacher.

7) He follows classroom rules most of the time.

8) He interacts appropriately with peers most of the time.

9) He likes to have choices and control over his day.

10) He does better if the let him move around the classroom.

11) He read very well and at grade level or above.

Both the support and mainstream teachers say that my child with ADHD has a lot of potential and is intelligent. For this reason, they are providing him with more mainstream instruction than in the support classroom. This is so that he can learn to work at his academic level and have the example of the mainstream students to foster his ability to remain focused and decrease his need to move about in the classroom. They state that he does not work to his ability because he has other things on his mind. This could be tapping a pencil, twisting his chair or clicking his mechanical pencil obsessively during the day. It could also mean that he attempts to start unrelated conversations about music, skateboarding or whatever in the middle of an assignment. He will then become offended or agitated when the teacher tells him that it is not an appropriate time to discuss those topics.

*** He says that it is the manner in which they tell him that what he is saying is not appropriate, or when they loose patience with him, that upsets him ***

Although I respect and understand that my son has excellent teachers, I know my child well and what he explains does hold true to his personality. Prior to getting the support that he needed in our school system (it took years), and in interacting with teacher and volunteer parents in unstructured environments (i.e. library, art and music class as well as on the playground), he is used to dealing with a level of frustration, impatience and lack of acceptance that those without ADHD do not realize that they project.

Regardless, I find his teacher's decision to provide him with more mainstream instruction extremely supportive and beneficial. Especially since my son is a child with ADHD that is not on medication.