7 Habits Help Adult ADHD's Treatment

I first learned about the 7 Habits when I was a pastor. I was drawn to Steven Covey's teaching because it made sense and addressed a deep need I had in life - I did not like the things I was doing and I wanted to change. I was not involved in immoral or illegal activity in any way, I was a pastor and fairly well respected in the community. The habits that were holding me back personally and professionally I wanted to change were procrastination, highly disorganized, impulsive in some decision making, inability to complete projects I started, continually losing or forgetting things, having trouble following conversations or "zoning out", often irritable, and often restless and full of nervous energy. I was also rather introverted and shy by nature which made it hard in my job to be around people most of the time.

It has been 12 years since I first learned of the 7 Habits. Granted, I have not been applying the 7 Habits like I should, but I know these habits are the right path and a source of stability for me. Adults with ADHD often know the right things to do but find it difficult if not impossible to carry them out. So, in my ADHD fasion, I know I must start at the beginning.

The first of the seven habits is "Be Proactive". It is a popular habit of our generation to blame others for our shortcomings. Some of this blame can be true, however adults with ADHD need to come to grips with their shortcomings and say to self, "This is the way I am. I am going to have to deal with this regardless of where it came from. It's time to stop whining and start making a change." Adults with ADHD can learn to be proactive just like non-ADHD people can - except it may be more of a challenge. to choose their response even in the midst of negative surroundings. The adult with ADHD can be proactive just like other adults, though the road may be steep, the climb is definitely "do-able."

Here are some tasks adults with ADHD can do to help develop the habit of proactivity.

1. Think about one simple thing you know you should but have difficulty carrying out. This task could be as simple as waking up or going to bed 15 minutes early in the effort to get more sleep. Practicing this habit for at least 3 weeeks will help solidify this task into a habit.

2. To help with the challenge of remaining attentive, (1) begin carrying a pen and paper around to take notes of key meetings or key conversations, (2) when you are talking with someone stop what you are trying to multi-task and look them in the eyes - this will help your focus, and (3) practice the art of listening on a deeper level - ask questions about the other person to stimulate your interest in the conversation, "How are you?" "What are you working on now?", "How was your day today?" "What was your favorite thing that happened today?" I'm not encouraging you to be cheesy and plastic about this, but simply practicing pulling out of your comfort zone and tapping into the world of another. It works with your spouse, your friends, your kids, your boss, etc. You get the idea?

3. To help with the challenge of procrastination, (1) find one project that you have started but have not finished and think about why you didn't finish it. Ask a friend or significant other for some help completing it or try to "think outside of the box" for some ways to attack the completion of the project - things you may have never thought of before. (2) Write out the tasks that need to be done to complete the project - write these on a piece of paper. Set some type of realistic deadline for each of those tasks - and as you complete them - check them off. You will find that breaking down the overwhelming tasks into shorter bite-sized pieces will help you deal with them and get them done.

4. To help with controlling your impulses - (1) For many adults with adhd - impulsive spending is a big issue that lead to money problems which lead to stress, tension, and anxiety. Most adults with ADHD know what a budget is and know how to do a budget, but immediately forget it when the urgency to have overcomes logic. Begin to think ahead about the feelings you have after you spend the money - does it bring you joy or shame? Do you end up returning what you have bought on impulse - wishing you would have never bought it in the first place? Could it be that the joy of not spending your money on impulse give you strength to "say no" to the impulse? Often it helps the adult with ADHD to find a significant friend, parther, or other to help keep them accountable and to encourage them and affirm them when they have a private victory over impulsive actions.

There are six more habits to complete the set of "7 Habits" - Do not look too far ahead and get overwhelmed!

I would encourage adults with ADHD to practice the first habit of proactivity until they see a few private victories. Then after a few victories over a few weeks or a month, they can continue to the second habit, "Beginning with the End in Mind". Using the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People will help make any adult adhd treatment a more effective one.