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Answer Me Jesus

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He'll answer all your questions!

I was at Spencer Gifts and I saw the Answer Me Jesus (tm) for $5. Where else can you get answers to life's most challenging questions for only $5! So I took it home.

The first question I asked was, "Jesus, will I ever find a man who deserves me?" The answer came, "I still love you."

I think that's a no. If the reply had been "we'll see" I REALLY know it would have been a no because I know what that means! I asked again and got "no chance in He--." Darn it.

(Please note, this is just a toy, not a bash on religion! "For fun and prophet!")

Contents at a Glance

You asked, Jesus answered!
Ask Jesus
Answer me Jesus in Action
Jesus...Answer Me!
Looking for your own Answer Me Jesus (tm...
Thanks for visiting!

You asked, Jesus answered!

Q: Should I have Subway for dinner?
Jesus: Sinner
I think he's telling me to stop eating out so much.
Sandy asks: Will I always be a waitress?
Jesus says: It is not righteous
Sandy asks: Will I ever meet and marry a good man?
Jesus says: yes
Finally! A definite answer!
Elgiva Anne asks: Lord Im have two options for my work, either I continue to work in the same firm under different conditions or I work in ACL?
Jesus says: Wait for a sign.
Kate asks: Is pudding an amorphous solid or a viscous liquid?
Jesus says: It is not righteous
So now that we know what it ISN'T...
Q: Should I stay at work or go home early
Jesus says: sinner
Again with the bad ideas...
Q: Do I call him or wait for him to call me?
Jesus says: I still love you
K, I won't bother...
Ramona asks: does he know I cared?
Jesus says: No chance in hell

Ask Jesus

Ask Jesus a question. As I receive your question, I'll ask Jesus what he thinks and post your question and his answer on this lens. Check back often to see what people are asking and how Jesus is guiding them to making good choices.

Reply

Alban May 15, 2008 @ 1:36 am | delete

Very funny, thanks. And he does answer all my questions. I only have to listen.

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pop99 Nov 20, 2007 @ 9:27 pm | delete

LOL! I've never seen an Answer Me Jesus but I want one! This online "Fate Ball" is worth checking out: http://www.ifate.com/fateball.html