Are the Terrible Twos for Real?

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What are the Terrible Twos?

You've heard the term terrible twos, but what does it mean? The best way to describe it is that one day, you have an adorable baby who is the delight of your eyes and then suddenly, it's as if an alien body snatcher has taken over your child.

Is it really that bad? It depends on the child. My first two never really went through this stage. Now, you all know what they say about the third time being the charm?

Image by kakisky at morgueFile.

Tantrums in Toddlers

So, why do toddlers act up like this? For starters, for the first time in their lives they no longer have to be content with just observing things.

By the time kids hit the age of two, most are walking, running and climbing, which means they now have the capability of exploring anywhere they want to go.

Unfortunately, toddlers don't yet understand what all is safe and unsafe, so if denied access to where they want to go or what they want to do, they often break down and throw a temper tantrum.

Now, no one wants to listen to what sounds like a screaming hyena for very long. However, caving into your child's demands will only reinforce the behavior.

This is a great time to start teaching repercussions for inappropriate behavior. Time outs are recommended, along with talking to your child about the incident that just took place.

This is not a one time fix the problem solution. This is an ongoing process that requires parents to be consistent.

Of course this doesn't guarantee that the next time you go to the store and your little darling grabs a toy and you say no, that he or she won't dramatically drop to the ground, screaming and crying while flinging all body parts around like someone who just stuck a wet finger in a light socket.

Photo by sjs5769 at morgueFile.

Toddler Temper

Another reason toddlers display destructive behavior such as tantrums, hitting, etc. is out of frustration. A child at this age does not yet have the verbal skills to vocalize their thoughts or feelings. Instead, they act them out.

Although it can be tempting to raise your voice and yell, it is much better to stay calm and talk to your child in a calm voice. Then, you can go into the garage and hit the punching bag.

Photo by ali110 at morgueFile.

Toddler Photos

Miss Raegan 6 by javcon117
IMG_5018-2 by Henri Photography
dad, hurry up and take the photo. by ripkas
 by ripkas
 by ripkas
 by ripkas
 by ripkas
chair! by ripkas
 by ripkas
 by ripkas
bear and her mini pool. by ripkas
water play! by ripkas
Fearful by Cameron D. Mitchell
Look Where I Am by sahdblunders
Pushing It by sahdblunders
Reaching for trees by sahdblunders
Nurse Tessa by Tammy McGary
Daughters - C by cpaparcuri
automatically generated by Flickr

Terrible Twos Behavior

When my third child hit the terrible twos, one thing he liked to do was help. Now, that may sound like a good thing, but there's the difference between good help and bad help. He liked to do the latter.

For example, one day he decided to help with cleaning. He opted to wash fish bowl. Unfortunately, it didn't occur to him to remove the fish first. Those poor fish never stood a chance.

Another time he decided it would be a good idea to clean the bathroom sink. He had seen me soak pots and pans, so he thought it best to soak the sink, first.

He put in a plug, turned the water on, walked out and closed the door. It wasn't until the third room started flooding that I discovered this. The good news? In time, carpeting does dry.

Photo by anitapatteron at morgueFile.

Dealing with Toddlers

Children at this age love to explore and experiment. I know my third child did. He especially liked to explore when I had my back turned.

One time I turned away from him for less than a minute to check my baby in the stroller while visiting Yosemite. When I turned back, he was gone. I finally caught him as he was boarding a tour bus.

At that moment I realized why parents hooked their kids up to safety harnesses like little animals. I saw the light!

At this age he also developed a creative side. You would be amazed at the wonderful artwork a child can create with a poopy diaper. I still have the carpet stains.

The key thing to remember? Patience.

Photo by juditu at morgueFile.

Toddler Throwing a Tantrum

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Beginning Preschool

Often toddlers will begin some kind of preschool program. I know how excited my child was on his first day of school.

The teacher and him really hit it off. I remember her telling me how much she enjoyed him, how advanced he was for his age and what a scientific mind he had due to all of his curiosity.

That honeymoon didn't last long.

One day I came to pick him up and she was having a complete meltdown due to him. Tears were literally streaming down her face as she claimed how much she loved him, but didn't know what to do with him. Needless to say, that was his last day at that preschool.

In other words, not all preschools work for all toddlers.

Photo by phaewilk at morgueFile.

Surviving the Terrible Twos

The question on your mind right now might be if you will survive the terrible twos. The answer is with any luck, eventually! I know at age 13, my son will one day be free of those difficult years. Of course, you may pick up a few gray hairs along the way. Thank goodness for Nice & Easy!

Seriously, though. If you think the toddler years can be challenging, wait until you have teenagers!

Photo by phaewilk at morgueFile.

Tantrum Photos

Light patterns by susivinh
tantrum by lovelornpoets
DSC_6716 by Capture_themoment
DSC_6714 by Capture_themoment
DSC_6713 by Capture_themoment
DSC_6724 by Capture_themoment
drama by Francisco Carbajal
OLD AND NEW by Francisco Carbajal
the word is no by nerissa's ring
Spoiled-Brat American Electorate by Mike Licht, NotionsCapital.com
baby road rage by Joelk75
taunting by Joelk75
parking lot baby rage! by Joelk75
Day Sixty - Stress Management for Professionals (60/365) by The Crystal Fairy
So People Will Believe Us by timsamoff
Xmas Hoax 129 by Sum Doood
Xmas Hoax 115 by Sum Doood
Xmas Hoax 127 by Sum Doood
automatically generated by Flickr

Toddler Poll

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Best Toddler Book

What to Expect The Toddler Years

Amazon Price: $8.59 (as of 05/30/2012)Buy Now

This is a wonderful book that covers everything about toddlers from tantrums, to potty, sleep issues and more. I found it to be so helpful when my kids were this age.

Toddler Books eBay

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Toddler Tip

As much as we try to watch our kids 24/7, there are times when we need a little break. It could be to do something as simple as go to the bathroom or make a quick phone call.

As toddlers can act up when they're bored, I found that if I put on a fun kids' video for a bit, my kids would be happy and I could get something done.

I love The Wiggles because the music is fun and it gets kids moving and dancing around.

Wiggles Hot Potato

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Wiggles DVD

Hot Potatoes: The Best of the Wiggles

Amazon Price: $98.99 (as of 05/30/2012)Buy Now

Wiggles DVDs eBay

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The Angelic Child

Hopefully, one day your terrible two child will go back to the angel he or she really is.

Image courtesy of WPClipart.

Child Safety Harness

If you have concerns about your toddler taking off on you, you might consider a child safety harness when you go out in public. I can't tell you how handy this came in for me.

Diono Sure Steps Child Harness, Blue

Amazon Price: $5.99 (as of 05/30/2012)Buy Now

Safety Harnesses on eBay

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Please share your toddler stories.

  • LittleLindaPinda May 17, 2012 @ 8:22 am | delete
    It's been a very long time but luckily my kids didn't experience the terrible twos.
  • miaponzo May 8, 2012 @ 3:22 pm | delete
    Terrible Two's????? How 'bout terrible 20's?????? Blessed!
  • Ladymermaid Apr 24, 2012 @ 2:30 pm | delete
    Yep the terrible twos really are exactly as they sound - terrible! Fortunately kids do grow out of this awful awkward phase of childhood and into much nicer little creatures ;)
  • WriterJanis Apr 26, 2012 @ 3:46 pm | delete
    Then they hit their teens. LOL
  • canoz Feb 10, 2012 @ 8:57 am | delete
    I had two great kids and then the third one that challenged me... a lot! I will testify to the benefit of getting back to basics with diet. Cutting out food additives/colours saved my life... not to mention my sons. Sue Dengate can be googled and is a great advocate to how foods can effect our kids and which ones to definitely avoid. 160b (annato) for example has been shown to cause pain in the head and, surprise surprise, head banging in toddlers. It's in many yoghurts and ice creams. What a shame if we label these kids 'naughty tantrum throwers'. I think an awareness needs to be raised about this. Having said that, your lens did make me smile. What parent of toddlers couldn't relate?! Smiles!
  • WriterJanis Apr 5, 2012 @ 12:57 am | delete
    Thank you.
  • lftypjk900 Feb 9, 2012 @ 4:31 pm | delete
    my grandson is in the throws of the terrible two's-- enough said!!!! (great lens- an sending it on to my daughter-in-law)
  • WriterJanis Apr 5, 2012 @ 12:57 am | delete
    Wish her luck for me.
  • Mujjen Feb 6, 2012 @ 4:05 pm | delete
    My daughter decided to wash her new, expensive vest. In the toilet bowl. Unfortunately she reached up to flush it. At least she had the pretty, matching pants the rest of the summer!
  • WriterJanis Apr 5, 2012 @ 12:56 am | delete
    Oh that's funny.
  • SammySpam Feb 6, 2012 @ 1:29 pm | delete
    One of my cousins recently hit 2 years old and the terrible twos are definitely in her.
  • WriterJanis Apr 5, 2012 @ 12:56 am | delete
    It's a challenge.
  • Jillynn Feb 6, 2012 @ 9:45 am | delete
    For me, it is my granddaughter. She can be sweet and adorable one minute and completely possessed the next!
  • WriterJanis Apr 5, 2012 @ 12:55 am | delete
    Oh yes! That's it!
  • Richard3331 Feb 3, 2012 @ 2:58 am | delete
    Its a tough job
  • WriterJanis Apr 5, 2012 @ 12:48 am | delete
    It can be.
  • MareeT Feb 1, 2012 @ 6:40 pm | delete
    I remember my son having temper tantrums and throwing himself on the floor when he was unhappy. Glad those days are over!
  • WriterJanis Apr 5, 2012 @ 12:48 am | delete
    Oh yes. The throwing oneself on the ground temper tantrums. One of the worst things about the terrible twos, especially when out in public.
  • AndyPo Jan 31, 2012 @ 6:51 pm | delete
    Great advice. My son was two a couple of weeks ago. He's a little monster some of the time, but it is just so wonderful watching him learn and develop. We know the occasional tantrums will pass... I hope.
  • WriterJanis Apr 5, 2012 @ 12:47 am | delete
    They will in time.
  • kathysart Jan 31, 2012 @ 9:53 am | delete
    I am not sure which is worse.. teens or twos..LOL. Angel blessed lens.
  • WriterJanis Apr 5, 2012 @ 12:46 am | delete
    Thank you for the blessing!
  • jercow75 Jan 30, 2012 @ 3:11 pm | delete
    My little angelic boy has started crying and taking slaps at his mother for little reason. He doesn't try quite the same with me, so we're trying to figure out how I can support her best I can. Great lens.
  • WriterJanis Apr 5, 2012 @ 12:46 am | delete
    I hope that passes soon.
  • mary_lighthouse15 Jan 30, 2012 @ 12:27 pm | delete
    Thank God my toddler grew up into a good 7 yr old boy! This lens made me reminisce my hard moments with my son. Thanks for sharing!
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WriterJanis

I love to write. Besides writing for Squidoo, I have also written for various online sites including Suite101, Xomba, Factoidz and more. I'm a blogger... more »

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