High On Crack: Plumb Over-Exposed
Crimes of visual "over-share".
They can happen anywhere, in any climate and every part of the world. In our culture of over-share, people somehow have come to think showing a sliver of your own full moon to the world in everyday settings is a fine thing to do.
How many of you are just plumb tired of the unsolicited viewing of another person's posterior cleft?
There are some things that you just don't want to see unless you really know someone well. Then there are some things you don't want to see no matter how well you know the person.
These are just some of the "nicer" terms for exposed buttock cleavage.
Builder's Bum
Plumber's Crack
Coin Slot
Sideways Smile
Then there is the modern cousin of the Plumber's Butt, born of a new trend in foundation wear (the thong/ g-string) combined with the lowering of the waistband in off-the-rack trousers. This brings us to new lows in the concept of tacky dressing. Read on to learn more about this travesty of fashion.
Oh where did good taste and decency go?
Oh, we're just getting started...
BTW- Every pun here is completely intentional!
I See a Bad Moon Rising...
CCR's John Fogerty (Moon Photo: NASA)
(Yes, that is the natural color.)
BAD MOON RISING - Misheard Lyrics?
I swear at the end he says "There's the Bathroom on the Right"!
What do you think?
Bathroom Reading
Fortify Your Library
Here are some good choices for light and easy reads, plus you'll impress others with your wealth of wisdom gleaned from those quiet moments alone in the privy.
Flushed: How the Plumber Saved Civilization
"Hodding Carter has enough charm to fill a toilet tank, and I don't mean the new 1.6-gallon low-flush. No one else could make me laugh heartily while reading about the miraculous lead pipes of ancient Bath (which Hodding tries to replicate in his yard and nearly destroys his marriage and many of his brain cells). Thanks to Hodding, I know the most amazing things: medieval moats were cesspits, the original bio-warfare! -- Mary Roach
Avg. Customer Rating: 
Amazon Price: $24.00 (as of 11/11/2009) 
McGraw-Hill's Dictionary of American Slang and Colloquial Expressions: The Most Up-to-Date Reference for the Nonstandard Usage, Popular Jargon, and Vulgarisms of Contempos (McGraw-Hill ESL References)
Understand the meaning and origins of today's lingo! What else are you going to do while you wait on the can?
Avg. Customer Rating:
Amazon Price: $15.61 (as of 11/11/2009)
Bum Bags and Fanny Packs : A British-American American-British Dictionary
All English is not the same! When you're dealing with people on both sides of the pond it's good to know the differences between British and American slang. This could save you a heap of embarrassment or a world of trouble!.
Avg. Customer Rating:
Amazon Price: $11.66 (as of 11/11/2009)
Classic Plumber's Butt
CAN'T YOU FEEL THE BREEZE?
Awwww. Now, you have to admit, that is awfully cute. However, this apparition looses all charm once the subject is over the age of 5.
Main Causes of "Plumber's Crack"
Any one or combination of the following can lead to Crack Exposure:
1. Need a belt/ suspenders
2. Shirt too short
3. Trousers too small/ too low rise
4. Trousers too big
5. Poorly cut trousers designed by idiot fashion designers (Perhaps a deliberate "wise-crack" that leaves them laughing all the way to the bank...)
My burning question:
"Can't you FEEL the DRAFT of air on your derrier?"
How can you NOT know you're skin is exposed?
4
VOTE: Which one do YOU find the most disturbing?
Overexposed
Match the numbers to the photos above and...
GAME: Plumber's Butt Pandemonium
Just say "NO" to crack.
Just PRAY that they didn't have beans for breakfast!
- Plumber's Butt Pandemonium
- Play the game online (free).
Watch out, those repairmen are FAST!
Plumb Great Stuff on Amazon
Closing the Gap: Jeans for Every Generation
Trousers' Trail - From Miners Camps to Minor Scamps
This gives rise to many interesting, sometimes functional but often ridiculous paramutations.
Here is a list of some of what has been done with the common blue jean:
Highwaters
Tapered Jeans
Skinny Jeans
Hip Huggers
Bell Bottoms
Elephant Flares
Boot Cut
Applique-covered
High-Waisted
Low-Rise
Stone Washed
Patched
Painted
Studded (metal studs applied)
Rhinestone
Disco "Painted-On"
Acid Washed
Overdyed
Bleach Splattered
Distressed (Pre- so they look worn-in, or even ready to fall apart)
Cut or Ripped Jeans (razor-styled holes & slashes)
Holes in "strategic places" with a colorful bandana stuffed inside.
Cut-offs
Clam-Diggers
Belted (and variations of belt widths)
Unbelted
Suspenders/ Bands
Cuffed (small or deep)
Uncuffed
Hind Sight & Rear Visions - The "Butt Cam"
When the 3-Way mirror just won't cut it, the "Butt Cam" offer customers a view from behind
If you're prepared to spend between $135 - $900 on a pair of jeans, then you can get a great "sneak preview" of what other will see when they check out your booty with the BUTT CAM (patent pending).
BBC News Player - 'Butt-cam' offers rear views
VIDEO - A shop in the US state of Arizona has inst more...2 points
Hub Clothing
The high-end clothing shop where it all started in more...0 points
Butt Cam provides bottom line for Scottsdale jeans buyers | www.tucsoncitizen.com ®
Associated Press article.0 points
Put a Stop to Crack on the Streets
CafePress
Stickers, shirts, ball caps, buttons, magnets, hoodies & more.
Do your part to stop crack in it's tracks!
Blue Jean - David Bowie & The Aliens
"Look out world, you know I got mine!"
No saggy trousers or exposed bum cracks here!
Finding Your Dream Jeans (for Women & Men)
Solutions from tips on fitting to custom-made for you!
Women, especially, know this quandary:
Finding the right pair of jeans for your body type. You can't even trust the same brand/ same cut from year to year as they insist on making minor alterations that change the fit. Maddening!
Here are some links to help find just the right fit - whatever your body type!
Jeans Therapy
Find the perfect pair of jeans with our body-speci more...0 points
Denim Dos and Don'ts: Jean Expert Stacy London
Stacy London, host of TLC's 'What Not to Wear,' wa more...0 points
Oprah's Bra and Jean Intervention: Best Jeans for Every Body
Oprah's jean expert Stacy London reveals the best more...0 points
TJ's - Tailored fit custom made jeans - Tailor Made Jeans Wear: Tailormade Jeanswear Home
Tailor Made Jeans, For all your custom designer je more...0 points
Suppress that Muffin Top
Muffin top is a relatively new term and a relative more...0 points
Stupid is as Stupid Does
Classic 'Gumpism'
Gump was a wise man. He always dressed sensibly and wore a belt!
More recent trends seem to inovlve appearing that you are about to LOSE your britches.
Gangsta-wannabes go around with pants that are worn BELOW the bum-line. At least in MOST cases these guys (and I say guys because I've NEVER seen a woman attempt this look) wear shirts that fully cover the exposed posterior. But this does cause them to walk with a funny gait, because they are trying desperatey to keep their pants from falling down around their knees. No, wait, some actually WEAR them down around their knees.
If you really live in "the hood" where danger lurks around every corner and drive-by shootings abound, wouldn't it be SMART to wear clothing that would allow you to move quickly and easily, rather than make you hobble, waddle, trip and fall and get your butt kicked, or worse? Maybe this is to HELP you fall down to dodge flying bullets. Uh, yeah, sure, I can see that...
There is also the "layering effect" of the low-rise
trouser with the underwear making anything from a nice crescent to a full "trunk-ring" above. These kids are referred to as Saggers.
Now we have all these girls with exposed cracks too. The pants are cut so low that there's simply nowhere to hide. Couple that with ridiculously small-cut tops that look like they're from the children's department and you're asking for trouble.
Not keeping one's trousers in proper place was once cause for ridicule. This was a clear-cut sign of either not being too bright or too suave, or both.
Exposing one's full bum was a brief but intentional act of social defiance. Now it seems so commonplace that the Full Moon has rather lost its effectiveness. People are just numb to the full-bum.
Why is it suddenly cool to look like an idiot that can't dress themselves? My nephew had more fashion sense at the age of 5 than most of these guys.
Baggy Trousers - Madness
"Baggy trousers, dirty shirt. Pulling hair and eating dirt..."
What are they saying?
Singing at a Gilbert and Sullivan pace with those thick accents can make it a little hard to decipher.
See the lyrics here
Baggy Pants Ban?
Atlanta and other U.S. cities seek to ban those sagging slacks...
Why anyone would want to imitate a style that started in prison is beyond me.
The truth that many who do this don't realize is, that aside from looking stupid and being impractical, it is meant to be an "invitation".
Lonely prisoners "present themselves" to others by wearing their pants down low to say they are available for some "cell-block cuddling".
Hey, if people wanna look stupid, that is their right. Kids are prone to rebel against authority. Banning something simply makes it a tempting "forbidden fruit". Banning it will simply drive more kids to do it as an act of defiance. It appears it is better to look like a rebellious idiot than a person with common sense and good taste.
I think education is the key. Run TV & YouTube ads about the origin and meaning of this style. If more kids understood the real meaning behind it they'd stop it immediately.
Latest News on Baggy Pants Bans
Hope on the horizion...
End to Baggy Pants fad in sight:
Just with any fad, they all run their course and it appears this trend is reaching it's tail-end (thankfully!). It just seems like we've been "waiting it out" forever.
Looking back on the mid 1980's one stupid fad that was going around was to carry a huge portable stereo (boom-box/ ghetto-blaster as they were called) around on your shoulder with the sound insanely loud and the speakers pointing at your ear. This was almost exclusively very young urban men. Hmmmm, wonder how many of them now have premature permanent hearing impairment? With the baggy pants, I have to wonder how many have back and hip alignment problems?
Wow, the things people do to appear "cool" or "hip". Amazing how fast common sense vaporizes in the quest for cool. Trendiness must be tempered with common sense and thinking beyond "today" to avoid anything from minor mishaps to serious, permanent damage.
Fetching RSS feed... please stand byWhy Baggy Pants are Not Allowed in Schools
For Heaven's Sake - Get a Belt and Pull Your Pants Up!!!
Great belts on eBay!
You don't have to spend a fortune to look like a million dollars.
I don't know why, but the STRANGEST things come up on searches for "Belt" at eBay.
I am NOT responsible for what shows up here. All I've done is set the keyword. It doesn't seem to be able to just search for a BELT. All kinds of things with belt in the description will show - belt buckles, belt clips, garter belts, belted garments and more.
Sometimes an actual normal belt for trousers will show. Amazing!
Good Luck!
Fetching new data from eBay now... please stand by
Say What?
Join the debate!
It's a hot debate:
Baggy pants vs. no baggy pants.
What do you think?
What do YOU think about baggy pants?
Fetching blurbs now... please stand byBaggy pants are stupid.
Baggy pants are cool.
Venus Di Milo to Madonna - High on Crack
Ancient Exposure
Women are not immune to Plumber's Crack.
It appears even Madonna can't resist letting it all hang out.
Well, we all knew how decadent Roman society became in the days before the Roman Empire finally fell. It all began with a "crack in the infrastructure"...
Whale Tails
Why is it trendy to look tacky?
"Pretty is as pretty does." goes the old saw. Therefore:
STUPID is the NEW PRETTY
What happens when you mix low-cut hip-hugging jeans and trousers with high-cut thongs and g-strings?
A new species of tacky: the Whale Tail
Part of the problem is that popular mass-produced fashion leaves people no choice. It is like the micro-mini skirts that one had to learn precisely how (and how not) to move in to avoid over-exposure.
People these days just can't be bothered with clothing that impedes movement, so they just buy what's available and suffer the side-effects of poorly cut ready-to-wear fashion.
Like the "lipstick on the teeth code" where women that don't even know each other are bound by an unwritten code to inform the other of if such should happen, lady friends were bound to tell each other if a bit of underwear were exposed. An errant bra-strap would bring a stealthy, helpful whisper of "You've got some 'white trash' going on over there sister" or "It's snowing down south of France" for a slip hanging out below the skirtline. The subject would then quickly attend to the problem and be grateful to be saved from further embarassment.
These phrases of social-assistance are actually in danger of becoming extinct, since it seems fewer folk are having the consciousness to know these things could even be an issue. A few, however, embrace and even relish the chance to expose themselves. A coy "Oops, is that my boo-tay hanging out?" follows.
Whale Tails Galore - Genuine Flukes to Fashion Faux Pas
From the Oblivious Exposure-by-Accident
to the
Intentionally Tacky Trollup
(I had these all lined up to come out evenly, but sometimes you see it that way, and sometimes you don't. I'm tired of trying to outsmart the Flickr Module!)
#3 -
# 6 (A very rare MALE Whale Tail) Nice tag, honey.
Tacky Reading
From Amazon.com
I'M EASY... And I Have Bad Taste
Review from Rebecca Robbins (Los Angeles, CA USA) -
Reading this book is like sharing dirty little secrets over a few drinks with your best friends. I was literally laughing out loud several times and blushing furiously at others. Angel is irreverent and brutally honest in her views on the dating world. Sarcastic, Funny and not a little bit Jaded. It's a very fun read.
Avg. Customer Rating: 
Amazon Price: $18.00 (as of 11/11/2009)
Usually ships in 24 hours
VIDEO: Coin Slot Moisture Cream
SNL Product Parody
YouTube has pulled this video, it can now be seen at this link:
http://www.thebluething.com/media/Lindsay-Lohan-Coin-Slot
Seeing a Coin Slot Makes Me Want To:
With or without a Whale-Tail
(Yes, Mr. Gump, I too am baffled by this strange phenomena.)
...but, I don't have an iPod/ MP3.
No Worries. We've got CDs!
Why not enjoy an entire collection?
Great music by great artists at Amazon.com.
Just click the image or title to read more or purchase.
You can VOTE for your favorites here, too!
"Creedence Clearwater Revival - Chronicle, Vol. 1: The 20 Greatest Hits"
213 Customers give 5 stars! John with the band for more...0 points
Best of Bowie
82 customers give 4 1/2 stars! Excellent collectio more...0 points
Ultimate Collection
80's Ska band phenomenon. Just plain fun! In a bad more...0 points
Bad Fashion Self-Help Library
-How to avoid a myriad of tragic Fashion Disasters.
An Ounce of Prevention...
Covers a pound of flesh!
A Stitch in Time...
Saves your behind!
(from over-exposure)
THE COMPLETE IDIOT'S GUIDE TO SUCCESSFUL DRESSING
Avg. Customer Rating:
Amazon Price: (as of 11/11/2009)
List Price:
Dressing the Man: Mastering the Art of Permanent Fashion
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Amazon Price: $32.97 (as of 11/11/2009)
List Price: $49.95
Chic Simple Dress Smart for Women: Wardrobes that Win in the Workplace
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Amazon Price: (as of 11/11/2009)
List Price: $30.00
Glamour Do's and Don'ts Hall of Fame: Fifty Years of Good Fun and Bad Taste
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Amazon Price: (as of 11/11/2009)
List Price: $7.95
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Jimmie wrote...
Bummer, Coin Slot Moisture Cream is unavailable. Ha ha! I just said bummer on a lens about plumber butt. Rich.
Posted July 24, 2008
youhavegottobekidding wrote...
This is a Very Funny Lens. Funny but Informative. 5star for you.
Posted July 12, 2008
happy-jack wrote...
Talk about wise cracks. Only five stars
not enough. Thanks for a great lens
Posted April 17, 2008
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