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Best Sayings Ever

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Dedicated to Tracking Down the Best-Liked Sayings EVER... with your helpful input!

Vote for your favorites and please add your own choices. Together, we will create a list that really is The Best Sayings Ever!

With hundreds of thousands of websites devoted to millions of "favorite" quotations, it's obviously impossible to find the "BEST EVER," right? Everybody has a different opinion and we are all affected in different ways. A quote that strikes one person as deeply profound can cause somebody else to say, "Who cares?" So we might as well give up on this wild idea...

"Don't undertake a project unless it is manifestly important and nearly impossible."
-- Edwin H. Land, Inventor of the Instant Polaroid Land Camera

All right then, let's undertake this project...

Contents at a Glance

Defining Our Terms
YOU are Cordially Invited to Participate
Please Vote-For or Add-To the Quotations...
Best FUNNY Sayings Ever
Best PROFOUND Sayings Ever
Let's get your input right now...

How is a "Saying" different from a "Quotation?"

According to "dictionary.reference.com," a SAYING is "something said, esp. a proverb or apothegm." Synonyms are "maxim, adage, saw, aphorism." Wait, I never heard of "apothegm" before, either... What the heck is that?

According to "dictionary.reference.com," an APOTHEGM is "a short, pithy, instructive saying; a terse remark or aphorism." Also, apophthegm. Okay, I just learned an irrelevant new word...

And a QUOTATION, on the other hand, is "something that is quoted; a passage quoted from a book, speech, etc.: a speech full of quotations from Lincoln's letters." I get the point, but I am less than impressed that "dictionary.com" actually used the words "quotations" and "quotes" while defining "QUOTATION"... but let's move on.

For our purposes, let's say a QUOTATION is a statement attributed to a specific writer ("Life is not a spectacle or a feast; it is a predicament." -- George Santayana), and a SAYING is an unattributed statement (Those who forget this sentence are condemned to reread it).

YOU are Cordially Invited to Participate

I have offered my choices for BEST SAYINGS EVER -- But of course, not everyone will agree...

Please jump in with your votes and feel free to submit your own ideas. Eventually, the "BEST" will rise to the top and the "Less than Best" will drop down.

ALSO, I hope you will contribute to these other great lenses:

Best ATTRIBUTED QUOTATIONS Ever
These are quotes by specific authors in categories for Funny, Profound, Inspirational and Stupid!

Best OXYMORONS Ever
Oxymorons are contradictory/paradoxical phrases, and there are three categories: Quotations (author-attributed quotes), Sayings (non-attributed quotes), and Goldwynisms (a separate group that cannot be ignored).

Please Vote-For or Add-To the Quotations in the Lists Below

It's easy! Find your favorite quote in each category, then click the "UP" arrow. That adds one point to your selection and raises its ranking in the list.

Add your own brilliant saying for each category by clicking on the button at the bottom: "Add to this list." We really want and need your input here, so don't be shy. Thanks!

Best FUNNY Sayings Ever
Best PROFOUND Sayings Ever

Best FUNNY Sayings Ever

Here's a start! You can vote for these and add your own

With your help, I hope we can discover the top Best FUNNY Sayings Ever

Best Sayings Ever

Dedicated to Tracking Down the Best-Liked Sayings EVER... with your helpful input!

Contents at a Glance

Contents at a Glance

Defining Our Terms

How is a "Saying" different from a "Quotation?"

YOU are Cordially Invited to Participate

I have offered my choices for BEST SAYINGS EVER -- But of course, not everyone will agree...

Please Vote-For or Add-To the Quotations in the Lists Below

It's easy! Find your favorite quote in each category, then click the "UP" arrow. That adds one point to your selection and raises its ranking in the list.

Best FUNNY Sayings Ever

Here's a start! You can vote for these and add your own

1

There is never time to do it right, but always time to do it over.

2

The beatings will continue until morale improves.

3

A fool and his money are soon parted... but they were lucky to get together in the first place.

4

Eat right, don't smoke, don't drink, exercise daily... Die anyway.

5

REALITY is for people who can't face SCIENCE FICTION.

6

To err is human, but to really foul things up requires a computer.

7

Blessed are they who have nothing to say, and who cannot be persuaded to say it.

8

Tradition was just a fad.

9

Never call a man a fool -- Borrow from him.

10

A closed mouth gathers no foot.

11

The only thing we have to fear is PHOBOPHOBIA.

12

Every single person can convince themselves they are a genius. No married people can.

13

We are Microsoft. Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated.

14

Hard work has a future. Laziness pays off now.

15

Always remember you're unique... just like everybody else.

16

I.R.S. -- We've got what it takes to take what you've got.

17

Jesus is Coming -- Everyone look busy.

18

Don't sweat the petty things, and don't pet the sweaty things.

19

Confusion not only reigns, it pours.

20

I used to have a handle on life; then it broke.

21

Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

22

Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

23

The gene pool could use a little chlorine.

24

I didn't fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.

25

Okay, who stopped the payment on my reality check?

26

Time is the best teacher; Unfortunately it kills all its students.

27

Q: What is the difference between ignorance and apathy?

28

Q: What is 6 point 9?

29

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

30

Those who forget this sentence are doomed to reread it.

31

Those of you who think you know everything are very annoying to those of us who do.

32

Is there intelligent life on Earth?

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Best PROFOUND Sayings Ever