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Speaking German as a second language with your kids

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Raising Bilingual Kids

I've been speaking German (and English) with my American-born kids for almost 8 years now. In 2003, I turned my passion for German into my business, Alphabet Garten, offering German-language children's books to other like-minded parents. Along the way, I've spoken to thousands of customers, tried all kinds of things, hit a few bumps, and generally had a lot of fun. This lens is a collection of information I've gleaned over the years from raising my kids as well as talking to many other parents.

Getting started. Questions, questions, questions.

As if parenting weren't hard enough already, adding a second language to the mix generates so many many questions. Who will speak which language to the child? What do we do when friends and family come to visit? What if my spouse doesn't speak German? Will he feel left out? What if my German isn't perfect? Will my child pick up on my American accent? I feel silly chattering in German to a baby who doesn't understand me anyway! Is it better to start now or wait until the child has English firmly established? Do I say things in German and English when there are other kids over? Will other parents on the playground think I'm weird for speaking German to my kid when he is obviously responding in English? (This pattern of response is more common than you might think). Can I introduce German as a second language to an older child? And on and on and on. You get the picture.

Table of Contents

  1. Getting started. Questions, questions, questions.
  2. The Basics - Auf Deutsch, bitte.
  3. For Inspiration
  4. 1. Educate yourself and make a plan
  5. Further Reading - Basics of Bilingual Families
  6. Great Stuff on Amazon
  7. 2. Gather support
  8. 3. Gather resources
  9. Build your German library
  10. eBay Auctions
  11. 4. Try it out
  12. 5. Be prepared to change!
  13. Research on Bilingual Kids
  14. Alphabet Garten Blog
  15. Resources
  16. Bilingual language patterns
  17. Reader Feedback

The Basics - Auf Deutsch, bitte.

German input will eventually yield German output.

I can tell you that it's really very straightforward, although your personal implementation may be quite complex. In essence, someone should speak German to the child. That's it. Easy, huh? That someone can be one or both parents, a grandparent or other relative, or someone else who has frequent contact with the child. It might be an everyday occurrence, maybe only on the weekends, maybe even once or twice a week. Obviously the more German the child hears, the more proficient he will become. This person might be a native speaker or might have learned German as an adult (as in my case). The person might not even speak exclusively German with the child (see language patterns below).

The rest is just details. Ahh but the devil is in the details, right? Right. So read on.

For Inspiration

Read how other families have done it.
1 Family: 3 Children, 3 different stories
Patricia's story on my own blog about her three children learning English, French and Spanish.
Make Your Own Language Rules!
Lots of exposure to different languages produces enthusiastic learners.
Bilingual Parenting
Inspiring article with lots of details by Nadine Lichtenberger.
Interview with Nadine Lichtenberger
Lots of specifics here in a conversational interview format.
Bilingual Babies - Tribune Review
More stories from bilingual families
Multilingual Living Magazine
Extensive online magazine packed with articles of interest to bilingual parents. The first few pages are usually available for free. Highly recommended.

1. Educate yourself and make a plan

Whether you're beginning to speak a second language with a newborn or a middle-schooler, preparation is key. Educate yourself to the different patterns that your language use may take. Arm yourself against well-meaning nay-sayers who will tell you your child will grow up confused by two languages (he won't) or that speaking two languages will delay his speech (it won't). See the links below for articles and books with further information.

Spend some time developing your goals for your child. Do you want her to be able to have a close relationship with Oma in Berlin or does she just need to be able to order a meal in German? Does he need written fluency or is spoken proficiency enough? Does he need an understanding of the culture of your target language? Do you just want to give him a taste of a foreign language?

You can read about our unusual mixture of German and English on my blog.

Further Reading - Basics of Bilingual Families

Bilingual Language Patterns
Great article explaining different language patterns or systems. You may have head about OPOL, ml@h - this will make these terms clear.
Learning Two Languages
Overview on introducing a second language from the American Speech-Language Hearing Association.
OPOL4US
A website as introduction to a book by the same name. The website has an excellent discussion of various language strategies used by bilingual families.

Great Stuff on Amazon

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2. Gather support

The more foreign language input you have for your child, the better she will absorb the language and embrace it. Support can take the form of local friends and family members, playgroups that you find or sponsor yourself, trips to your target country, and long-distance relationships with relatives and friends in the target country.

Monolingual friends and family can also be a great source of support - let them know your plan and give them suggestions on how they can help you and your child. A few positive comments said within earshot of your child can do wonders for one who is feeling unsure of his proficiency. Kids who are old enough and proficient enough can act as translator when relatives come to visit - a very important job!

3. Gather resources

Build a home library. Books, books, and more books, plus some fun music, and maybe a few DVDs and games thrown in for good measure. Some parents pretend they only know how to read in the minority language, forcing the issue for bedtime stories, at least until kids are old enough to know better. I know some parents who own only German DVDs. The kids are happy 'cause they get to watch TV and the parents are glad to be reinforcing the minority language a little bit each time Dora the Explorer comes on.

Depending on your target language, you may also find a wide selection at your local public library. Spanish books are widely available and you may also have success with French, Italian and German. And don't underestimate the power of organized library patrons. Libraries will often approve funding for foreign language works if you can show that there is an interest in the community.

Build your German library

Places you can find German language materials.
Alphabet Garten
My own business, offering a hand-picked selection of German children's books, music and audiobooks, and German DVDs.
Books without Borders
A small but nice selection of German books for kids.
World of Reading
German books including many titles for middle school and high school.
Buecher Stube
Another German book supplier

eBay Auctions

Ebay is a great place to find used books, often sold in lots. Make sure to check shipping charges before bidding.
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4. Try it out

If you're starting with a newborn, all you need is a few picture books, a couple CDs and the motivation to start speaking in your target language, from birth if possible. It's so much easier to establish a habit of speaking the minority language from the beginning, rather than having to change down the line.

If you're starting with an older child, you may need to ease into it. Try picking a time of day, perhaps breakfast, where you plan say everything in the minority language and then translate to English when she needs clarification. Then you can slowly decrease the amount of English spoken and increase the times you use for your target language. Through repetition, your child will begin to pick up bits and pieces without much, if any, formal teaching required.

5. Be prepared to change!

You can be sure with kids that they will surprise you and there will be bumps in the road, diversions to the plan and probably some roadblocks! We have continually been revising our language plan over the past 8 years. We've had a monolingual grandma living with us (try keeping German up in that situation! You'll be repeating yourself in English and German all day long so no one is left out). We've had new babies and kids who refused to speak or listen to German. One of our children, who shall remain nameless, currently claims to not understand any German and refuses to watch any German DVDs. He does enjoy, however, German music. We have dealt with special needs diagnoses. So we've learned to go with the flow. And when we get our feet back on the ground, we pick up where we left off and try to figure it out all over again.

Research on Bilingual Kids

Here are some more in-depth articles on bilingualism in children.
Children's way with words sparks research
Dr. Elena Nicoladis, a professor in the University of Alberta Department of Psychology, found her own children prompted fascinating language research questions.
Ask A Linguist FAQ - Bilingual Children
It's good to have an "official" perspective on the subject when faced with criticism.
Raising Bilingual Children: Common Parental Concerns and Current Research
Bilingualism isn't linked to delays in speech or language acquisition. Also, commercial language materials (TV programs, CDs designed to teach a language) are much less effective than reading to or conversing with a child.
Research Links from the Bilingual / Bicultural Family Network
Many more links to research with brief summaries.

Alphabet Garten Blog

German book reviews, thoughts on bilingualism, and homeschooling

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Resources

More good stuff

Myths about Bilingualism
I love this article - I hear these kinds of things cited over and over and it's great to have responses ready when well-meaning people offer unsolicited advice.
10 tips for encouraging minority Language
Nice ideas here.
Raising Bilingual Children: The Different Methods to Success
A succinct article by Christina Bosemark of the Multilingual children's Association on the different language patterns families often choose for bilingual living.
MULTI TONGUE KIDS
An active blog with lots of great info from a mom of two kids growing up with 4 languages!
German Alphabet
Pronunciation of the alphabet.
Tierlexikon
German.about.com's Tierlexikon - what do animals say in German?

Bilingual language patterns

Tell us how you divide up the languages in your family.

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Reader Feedback

What questions do you have? Do you like what you see? Maybe have something to add? Let me hear from you!

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  • Reply
    Jennifer Apr 12, 2011 @ 8:55 pm | delete
    My husband and I don't speak German, our children go to a German immersion school, they read and write in German at grade level and English above grade level. The girls did not start German until the age of 4, they love every moment of their education. The best decision we made for our girls.
  • Reply
    Irene Feb 4, 2011 @ 9:53 pm | delete
    I am a mother of 3. When my first child was born, I spoke mostly German to him, until he was about 3 years old. At 3, he was not speaking either language very well and I got nervous, so I decided to stop speaking German and started speaking English to him. Now that he is 6, his English is great, but he forgot the German. I have been trying to get back into the habit of speaking German to him, but it's been hard. Honestly, I don't know whether my kids will ever be proficient in German and I hate that they cannot very well communicate with Oma. Up until now, I have always heard people saying how easy it is to raise bi-lingual kids, no problems, etc. Reading your article and the comments made me feel better. Maybe there is hope for us after all.
  • Reply
    Margo_Arrowsmith Oct 28, 2010 @ 6:39 pm | delete
    My 4 year old grandson speaks fluent Spanish. His father only speaks Spanish to him and his mother only English. That is what they are going to do with my new granddaughter.
  • Reply
    Bettina Kraft Apr 10, 2010 @ 9:03 pm | delete
    Great article on raising bilingual kids! We have two sons, 5 and 9, and can reflect to the challenges pointed out above. Both me and my husband homeschool both in German (in the evenings and on weekends) to help them grow fluent in reading and writing too. It is not always easy, and keeping up the motivation level is tricky. They sometimes ask "Why do we need to learn German? My friends all speak English." Since we're traveling to Germany once a year we have a good answer for this one, but helping them to learn more about the country, things to do, and then using the vacation as an active learning phase had been very beneficial so far. We typically go to Germany once per year, for 3-4 weeks. Our kids are then attending local kindergarten and elementary school. This is a great learning experience. After a few days they even pick up the local dialect (we live near Frankfurt in Hesse). So we use books and resources like above over the year as a preparation for the "real" immersion experience. To prepare this and have places to go we actually started a travel business a few years back - Live Like a German http://www.live-like-a-german.com that we now use as an educational tool for helping our kids to learn about the places to go, things to do, and historic background. They also like all the pictures to look at. Of course, from our side the practical aspect of finding a place to live while staying in Germany was one of our primary motivations ...
  • Reply
    Carla Sep 23, 2011 @ 1:01 am | delete
    Hi Bettina,
    I realise that you wrote this post a year ago but am interested in understanding how you co-ordinated attendance at a kindergarten for such a short period of time. We are also interested in taking our two girls to German for a 2-3 month period but were concerned that it would be difficult to enrol them into a kindergarten for such a short period. Any suggestions would be welcome. Thanks in advance,
    Carla
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BilingualMom

I am a homeschooling, German-speaking, bilingual-parenting, business-running mom. Sleep? Ha! I wish :) It's all about the caffeine, baby.

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