Breakup Advice: Getting Over A Breakup
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Getting Over A Breakup
Getting over a breakup can be hard and at times may seem to be impossible - that you'll never get over it.
But you will and the pain will subside, eventually.
However, the breakup does not have to be a disaster.
It does not have to involve moping around the house week after week after week and going through tons of Kleenex.
There are other men or women out there and it takes time to find your soul mate.
It is not always easy dealing with the feelings that come when there is a break up.
Your friends will tell you that you will be fine or that you will meet someone else but that does nothing to address your feelings at the moment.
Here are some things you can do to get over a breakup.
- Analyze what happened. Although it may be difficult it is a good thing to begin with. By analyzing what happened and why it happened you will be better able to understand whether or not it was your fault and also to help you to move forward. You can then recognize what it takes to have a better relationship with someone next time.
- Speak to someone about what you are feeling. Oftentimes it is helpful to share your feelings with someone you trust who know or sees what you are experiencing. This will help to make you feel better and you can do it as often as you need to without becoming too dependent on it. So find someone who you feel comfortable talking to, who is sympathetic and a good listener. This person can be anyone you choose, from your parents, friends, work colleague or anyone else you are comfortable sharing your feelings with.
- Focus on your positive attributes. Recognize that no-one is perfect but that you do have many positive things about you that someone else will love. Try not to beat yourself up about what happened. If you are having problems focusing on your positive attributes then get your friends to tell you what the love about you.
One of the more common behaviors that people go through when there is a break up is to stop taking care of themselves.
It is important therefore that you get good amounts of rest, maintain a healthy diet, do some exercise as this will help to release the stress you may be feeling, and do what you need to build up your confidence.
Don't be afraid to have yourself a good cry. If you feel like crying then you should do it, as crying is a good way of releasing some of the pain you are feeling. The hurt and the loneliness are all a part of the process and if crying helps you to feel better at the end of the day then do it.
One very effective way of getting over a breakup is to check the advice at Forget your ex in 24 hours.
Here's my favorite link:
Overcoming A Relationship Breakup
Understand your pain, cry, scream, or whatever it is you need to do to get through the morning process!However, the breakup does not have to be difficult. Hiding your pain and putting in the back of your mind is not a good idea and can cause problems in the long run emotionally.
You may go through the hate phrase but try if you can to keep it short. It is not good or healthy to let it linger.
Remember you are a good person and you deserve to be happy.
Call your friends and surround yourself with people and family. They will help you through any rough patch.
Try and do things with people rather than turning yourself into a recluse. This really is not a good time to be by yourself. Some ideas for you to help overcome your breakup are:
- Do things with friends and family. Go to a movie, the mall anywhere and try to keep your mind off the breakup.
- Buy a toy stuffed animal. They make a great pillow to cry on and talk to and they will not give bad advice!
- Take a bath or shower. You may not feel like it but do it anyway and it will make you feel a lot better about yourself, feel relaxed, relieve a little tension if only for a little while.
- Keep a journal and write down your thoughts and feelings. It will help you to get your feeling out on paper that you otherwise cannot tell anyone else, even your best friend!
- Watch comedy shows, or movies. It is very important to laugh. Laughter is the best medicine.
- Keep your sense of humor and laugh at other people's jokes and smile as much as you can muster. It will help.
- Get a makeover, a new hairstyle, and new clothes; whatever makes you feel like a new person.
- Listen to music that will make you feel good. Don't listen to music that makes you sad, or want to cry.
What's Your Preferred Way Of Getting Over A Breakup?
Breakup Advice
Some more advice on coping after a breakup:- Do not date on the rebound.
- Leave your broken heart behind before you date another person.
- Wait a while before going out on dates. It is not fair to you or to your date.
- Don't worry about your boyfriend or girlfriend or what they might be doing now. Live your life and let them live theirs.
- Don't take revenge even if you want to get back at him or her. It is not healthy.
- Don't go chasing after your ex. There were reasons why you broke up. The reasons may be good or bad but the odds are that it probably will not work if you do get back together again. You will end up heartbroken all over again.
Find new hobbies, meet new friends, go bowling, to the movies, go where there are other people around and who knows you might just meet your soul mate!
If you have a computer, go into areas where you will meet someone.
Be careful, though, you never know what may or may not happen, especially in chat rooms.
Place a personal ad, as they are often successful.
Look on the bright side and you never know where your mate might be hiding. There are many, many success stories out there. Think positive on a new outlook and strive forward. Leave the past behind you and start new chapter in your life. You will be glad you did.
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Castelli recommends the FAST approach - Face it, Accept it, See the lessons and Take yourself to a new level.
More About Relationship Breakups
A relationship breakup (or otherwise simply known as a breakup) refers to the ending of a relationship, typically a romantic one. A breakup can vary from casual to emotionally traumatic.
Breakups can occur for innumerable reasons, including conflicts in personality, lifestyle changes, a breach in a mutual code of conduct or attraction to a different person. A breakup that is decided upon by only one person is commonly referred to in English as a dump.
In psychology, there are several models that attempt to explain the trajectory of the breakup or dissolution of a relationship.
One such theory for dissolution can include Lee's (1984). According to this theory, there are five reasons why, over time, a relationship "breaks down":
#Dissatisfaction ? partner/s become dissatisfied.
#Exposure ? the problem/s becomes apparent to both parties.
#Negotiation ? a solution is negotiated.
#Attempted resolution ? solution is applied.
#Termination ? if the solution does not work/there are no other...
Share Your Tips On Coping With Breakups
Hypnosis-Expert wrote...
Great Lens. I rated it 5 stars... Check out my related lens on Relationship Breakup.
Posted February 18, 2009
Colorfulscene wrote...
I have a break up lens too... Mine is about severing a business relationship though. I like your lens! Rated and favorited it!
Posted May 11, 2008
