Broken: My Story Of Addiction And Redemption

Having experienced addiction myself,
knowing the pain I caused family,
aware of the disappointments my children carried,
remembering our marriage relationship that was so shaky during my alcohol dependence ...

I have only recently allowed myself to look back at who I really was 33 years ago and what in the world I was searching for in those crazy days.

I recently hit a wall and couldn't sort out whether my complete healing could really help others. I've been in ministry alongside my husband for 30 some years, we've prayed with people from all walks of life: parents, children, seniors, bikers, alcoholics, drug addicts, sweet grandmas, homeless, people in ministry and burly truckers. We have never gone back to the old lifestyle. But the successes are overshadowed by the number of hurting that still need to be reached.

What's unique about our situation is that when we partied, drank and did drugs, we were together as a couple, diving in to drugs and alcohol all those years. Then miraculously we both became clean and sober the same night. We made a new commitment to go forward in our marriage and lives, without the substances, and accepted the love and support of an incredible group of Christians.

Until recently I was certain we were on the right path, yet sometimes when we're ministering to hurting people, questions have weaseled into my mind.

Are we making a difference, are we reaching, are we any help?

It's just that so much in today's society supports alcohol and even prescription drug use for coping mechanisms. It's promoted to those facing everyday stress. Now medicinal marijuana is legal in several states and who knows how much more addiction will result from this. Sometimes I sense an air of defeat.

I'm completely convinced emotional healing comes from faith, hope,and a "knowing" that the future is bright because we are here for a PURPOSE!

Then I found this book. I identified with William C. Moyers, though I didn't do the same drugs, I was on the same path.

I didn't know of him before the Today Show on NBC was interviewing him as an expert on addiction, representing the Hazelden Foundation, as a spokesperson for the Diane Schuler accident. Diane Schuler was the mom who was driving the wrong direction and crashed her vehicle into a car with 3 men in it, killing herself, her children and relatives children in August 2009. 8 people died. She had over 10 alcohol drinks in her system along with high levels of THC. News Article Here.

More recently he was interviewed by CNN concerning the death of Whitney Houston.

When he was on the Today Show he talked briefly about his own journey. He is the son of Bill Moyers, former Press Secretary, and journalist. He talked briefly about the cycle of addition. He mentioned this book. In his search for purpose, comparing his life to others, attempting to please his dad, he forgot to reach deep and tap into his own God given talents. This is his story, from crack house, to treatment and back, he tried and failed several times.

As I read the book I ached for his parents, brother, wife and friends as I saw myself in a skewed mirror of sorts.

What boldness to put this in writing. My prayer is he is still on the right path after this horrid journey. And I pray each day I can continue to serve God and reach people with my story of God's redemption.

I'm encouraged to write my story, and have found new insight into the lives of those still struggling. I still wonder how much worse our culture can become before we hit the brakes and make a u-turn in this journey called life.

From and including: Sunday, July 16, 1978 my first sober day til my death, but one day at a time.

PHOTO CREDIT Wm. C Moyers Hazelden web site