(by 4 people)
Oops!! Forgot a word --- DON'T ignore yourself!
It's estimated that some 50 million people in the USA are caregivers for people they love!
Even though it's out of love, caregiving is one of the hardest jobs you could ever have. It can also be a full-time job. Many people find themselves giving up careers, time with spouses and children, hobbies, social events and even vacations. Caregiving can take over many aspects of one's life.
One of the most appalling things a caregiver can compromise is their own health. Be it physical or mental, it can be devastating to them and also to the rest of their family.
Caregivers must --- AND I SAY "MUST"! --- do whatever they can to prevent their own burnout. They must realize that they can't do everything, and shouldn't even try! Burnout and caregiver stress include: feelings of anger, guilt and irritability; inability to concentrate; depression; and thoughts of actually harming themselves (just to name a few).
Caregivers must plan "breaks", just like professionals do. Continue seeing friends, having hobbies, or just taking a walk by yourself. Easier said than done?
This is where caregivers need to learn to ask for help! Can family members step in? Friends? Maybe professional outside help is needed.
There are many public and private organizations that offer caregiver support. It may be in the form of helping take care of your loved one, or taking care of YOU!!!
Take a look at your local community centers, churches, in your local telephone book, your local senior center, a local hospital. No matter what your needs are or your financial abilities, there are many people out there to help you.
Caregiving, with all it's demands and responsibilites, is hard enough. But, many find themselves taking care of someone who perhaps doesn't WANT to be taken care of! That, in itself, is enough for another chapter.
The most important thing to remember about caregiving is that it's all about LOVE. But we MUST also love ourselves enough to ask for help when it's needed.
Our moral here is ... DON'T ignore yourself ... ask for HELP when needed ... KEEP your own life!!!
NOW... please don't get me wrong....of course we need to be with our loved ones during their times of need! About 3 years ago, I spent 31 days at the hospital with my husband after his brain surgery. I even slept in the chair in intensive care with him! My children, though, did make sure that I left 1x a week to clean up at their houses (10 min away) & sleep in a bed while they stayed with their dad. This helped me from total burnout, because, once I brought him home, I had a 24hr a day job with him.
On the other hand, I've been caring for my mother for approx 20 yrs. She needs help, but isn't dying. So, I've asked for help by having a caregiver help me 2 days a week. This is when I can take care of myself! This is the time that I say "Caregivers...TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF!!!"
Please also take a look at this site to learn a little more about me... shoppingnetty
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Reader Feedback
wrote
This is so important! My step dad and I wrote up a contract of responsibilities concerning the care of my Mom who has Alzheimer's. Right at the top of it is the importance of maintaining each of our health. If something happens to us my mother's care will suffer. For more tips on making your life easier check out my lens at:
http://www.squidoo.com/TheSandwichGenerationResources
Thanks for the lens!
Paula Farris
"The Recovering Nonachiever"
Posted April 14, 2008
wrote
Margaret, I agree wholeheartedly with you! Please read my newly published paragraphs.
Posted March 28, 2008
wrote
Well, its a very nice thought, but my own dying loved one said 'you're gone too much' when I had only left the room for a half hour while he was sleeping! I had a very hard time with that after he had passed- if he needs you, he needs you. It won't be long and he won't be any bother at all, like that or not! So, I felt that if anyone had the right to need me all the time, it was him. It was the least I could do for him. Yes, it created difficulties for me later, but it was worth it, to know he had what he needed while he was still with me.
Posted March 28, 2008
wrote
Very important advice. I'm going to print this out for my Mom. Thanks for writing this lens.
Posted July 29, 2007
