Dirtly Little Secrets of a Cheating Spouse

Heidi's lover/boyfriend is also married. I know things he does to hide the affair from his wife. Why don't they just leave their marriage? Heidi says the time isn't right. She also isn't sure that her boyfriend will leave his wife.

I don't just sit around condoning her behavior. I tell her constantly to leave her husband. I tell her that if her boyfriend hasn't left his wife in six years, than he never will!! I have also told her that even if he never leaves his wife for her, she still needs to leave her husband. It is NOT helping her family.

First of all, he had a password on his cell phone. He owns a company and travels a lot for his work. This is the perfect way to have an affair. I obviously was not able to travel with him having small children at home.

He said he put the phone lock on so our kids didn't mess with his "work" phone. I was sitting in a parking lot one day while he was shopping at Home Depot. His phone was sitting there and I needed to use it. Couldn't do it...LOCKED!!

Caught him "viewing" an Escort website. He said a friend told him about this website and he just curious.

Later I noticed that he had loaded "Window Washer" software on our computer. He said he bought it for his work computer because there are things he needs to permanently erase related to business secrets. I was a little confused. I didn't need it on the home computer. There was nothing that I needed to permanently erase. You see, if you delete something from your computer whether it be an image or an email it sits in your computer somewhere, even when erased from the recycle bin. Computer guru's can find this stuff.

This program overwrites these pages making them unreadable. They call it a "wash"...you can even do a "wash" with "bleach" for extra measure!

And the biggest, can tell no lie, no excuse, clue.....there is a little program on your computer about saving passwords. I came across that one day for another reason. I saw, "Passwords to NOT save" listing two websites with rated "X" sounding names. I typed them into the web address and went to those websites. They were Escort services. To get passed the first page you have to give your credit card.

I was ready to leave. I wanted to leave. He denied that he ever met with any escorts. This is a different kind of affair than one with the emotional connection. But, its all the same to me, and I wanted a divorce. We did not split and now our marriage has never really recovered.

He is broken hearted always feeling like he is walking a tight-rope with me. He doesn't want to say or do something wrong so I leave for good. I am trying my best to get things back the way they were. Time will tell. For now, the best decisionfor me is to stay.

One thing you need to ask yourself. Are you willing to follow through with the information you find? In Heidi's situation, she wants to leave so badly. She is highly stressed; her hair is falling out. Her husband is a ticking time bomb with extremely high blood pressure and cholesterol. He has caught her almost red-handed, but yet he doesn't leave. He loves her so much.