Skip to navigation | Skip to content

Share your knowledge. Make a difference.

Cat Jokes and Funnies

1 - I can do better 2 - Jury's out 3 - Pretty darn good 4 - Splendiferous 5 - Awesometastic (by 3 people)   Your rating: 1 - I can do better 2 - Jury's out 3 - Pretty darn good 4 - Splendiferous 5 - Awesometastic

Ranked #3772 in Animals, #101689 overall

Rated G. (Control what you see)

Funny cat stuff

 

Let´s face it. There are may stories of the mysterious, sphinx-like cats. Sure, occasionally they may appear to look like that. But I have had cats in the family for... hmm, for over thirty years. And if there is anything I have learned, it is the fact that cats are funny. When I see funny cat films (you know those funny home videos), they make my day. Funny cats doing funny cat things. Funny looking cats going from sleep to beserk in three seconds. Funny pics of cats (ever seen the ones where someone bathes a cat LOL). The world is full of funny cat stuff and funny cat jokes. So stay tuned :)

(The latest writing in on the top, so if you just found this lense, start at the bottom)

Cat´s get their own way... 

How does the cat get its own way? With friendly purrsuasion.

Bite Me 

Pretty soon I realized that when cats like someone or something, they love to rub their cheeks on the person or object of their affection (you should see me writing this - one of the cats seems to be deeply in love with my laptop. Sort of disturbing when he not only pushes it with full force with his head but drools over the keyboard as well. Yuck). Later on I learned about the cat feromones and all that, but when I figured out the reason for this behavior on my own, I was six. So when I came home from school, the first thing I did was to bend down and let Misu rub her cheeks on my face. It was our home-coming ritual and important to both of us.

Well, all was well under the sun, but then one day Misu began to do what cats do when they really like someone. The only problem was I had no idea of this behavior beforehand. Suddenly she just bit me on the nose. And not only bit, but kept my nose between her sharp kitten teeth.

So, I come home, I bend down to greet Misu the way I had learned she wanted to greet me. And now all of a sudden I am stuck with a kitten dangling from my nose. Err....help? Someone?

Now I don´t exactly belong to the big-nosed-part of the population. Actually brother dear commented that when ever it rained, it had to rain straight into my head because my nose was so short he figured it was just two little holes in the middle of my head - above the opening he always asked me to shut. Well, to make things straight before anyone of you believes him, he lied. My nose is short, but not THAT short.

Still, there I was, really fearing that if the cat did not let go soon, I´d end up looking like my brother´s description. Or worse - I´d have to go to school with an exotic nose decoration hanging from my face. I had a vivid imagination, but now it failed me when I tried to come up with a good explanation to a cat on my face.

Then I realized that the grey furball dangling from my nose was purring. Ok. That was a good sign. I carefully opened her mouth with my hands and to my great relief she let go, almost toppled over when she rubbed her side to my leg and then ran into kitchen for treats. I suppose in her mind she had done her feline duties just like mommy cat taught and deserved to be rewarded.

I realized there was a lot more to cats´ inner life than I had known. Ever since then I have tried to figure them out, but as many cat owners have realized, it is a Mission Impossible.

Aha, hubby dear to whom I was just telling what I wrote, said that my brother was not alltogether wrong about it raining into my head. Had to say to him that if that was true, I would have drowned ages ago. Men... No logic!

Cats´ Law and Order 

What is a cat's way of keeping law & order? Claw Enforcement.

Cats and toes 

The first thing I noticed about kittens was that they were playful. At least Misu had no idea when she was supposed to sleep (which in our mind would have been at the same time as the humans slept). She happily ran around the apartment during the night - and much to my annoyance she decided my toes were some kind of mice. In short: I became pray. A ferocious furry fluffy grey tiger the size of a beanbag was after me. She waited for my toes, cleverly hidden behind a corner, and then swooshed to my feet when I appeared. Her little bum was wiggling, when she was searcing for the best hold of the floor so that the bounce would be just perfect (because of course the cats have their pride when it comes to big bounces). And oh boy was she fast! My brother laughed his head off when he saw me running away from the little wee bugger of a kitten who did her best to hang from my ankles and bite my toes. My toes and feet were full of little scratch-marks.

Hmm, come to think of it. Calvin must have had similar experiences with Hobbes...

The best fun for Misu was to wait when I was in bed and when asleep, pushed my feet from under the blanket. Just the moment she had been waiting for... You guess the rest.

But anyway - after Misu got tired chasing my toes (which happened surprisingly slowly in my opinion), she climbed to my lap and started to purr. Of course I forgave everything.

I wonder if this was the reason I pretty soon learned not to pay attention to little scratches or cuts, didn´t really even feel them that much...?

KittyCat Toekiller Stuff on CafePress 

Your kitten chases your toes? Well join the club with these products!

Any kitten owner will recognize this situation..

KittyCat Toekiller Green T-Shirt

Little kitten jumping at someone´s toes. Kitties are playful, and if you are a cat person, you know it too...

Price: 18.99

Buy Now

KittyCat Toekiller Women's Cap Sleeve T-Shirt

Pretty T-shirt for the owner of the playful kitten...

Price: 21.99

Buy Now

KittyCat Toekiller Messenger Bag

With a playful kitten around - check the bag before you go out. Well, you know - for some reason cats love bags...

Price: 24.99

Buy Now

KittyCat Toekiller Tile Coaster

Cats don´t just jump at your toes - they tend to run like crazy on the tables too. if your glass is on the way, a coaster is not a bad idea...

Price: 8.99

Buy Now

KittyCat Toekiller Journal

It will take more than one journal to write down all the stuff your cats will do. So better get started.

Price: 12.99

Buy Now

Powered by CafePress

Crossing an elephant with a cat 

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a cat? A big furry creature that purrs while it sits on your lap and squashes you.

My very first cat, Misu 

Little grey furball that stole my heart

I was six years old, when I SO wanted a dog. My parents probably saw in their minds´ eye what it would be like to walk the dog three times a day. I pleaded and assured them I would take care of the dog. Well, you know how it goes. I got a cat. My best friend got a dog. I envied her so much...

The day we went to get the kitten... I will always remember it. The mommy cat had slipped outdoors and l´amour with some local tomcat had now produced five kittens. I was told I could choose which one to take. I had read so much about how to pick a puppy and so I decided I´d use the method to kittens too. I petted them all and then left the room. I sat on the floor of the hall - and after a while a little beepy miaow was heard and one of the kittens ran out of the room and after me. She was the only grey one, the others were black and white like their mom.
She was so young her legs gave way when she tried to run - but run she did, and then tried to climb to my lap.

Yep, she stole my heart there and then. My brother was sulking because he would have wanted to have a tomcat, and preferably black and white.

And so I got my very first cat. Misu lived to be 13 years old. Because of her I could not imagine a life without cats - there was only one interval when I moved into my own home. When the phonecall one day came that Misu had slept away, I cried and decided I would have another cat immediately. And did. Three actually...

I Love My Kittycat Stuff on CafePress 

I Love My Kittycat! is the message on all these products.

I Love My KittyCat Jr. Jersey T-Shirt

This is just one example of the shirts with "I Love My KittyCat" design on it.

Price: 26.99

Buy Now

I Love My KittyCat Messenger Bag

This spacious messenger bag carries many things around - including your message that you love your cat.

Price: 24.99

Buy Now

I Love My KittyCat text 2.25" Button

You love your cat? Show it to the whole world with this button.

Price: 4.73

Buy Now

I Love My KittyCat Journal

The perfect journal to write down your cat memories. Why not use it to write down cat jokes and then use the journal to cheer you up when you need smiles.

Price: 12.99

Buy Now

I Love My KittyCat Teddy Bear

Who says teddies can´t have cats? This teddy sure is telling how much he loves kitty cats.

Price: 17.99

Buy Now

Powered by CafePress

Interesting cat material on the net 

Cat obedience training methods? Can there BE such a thing?? (Well, ok, I have actually witnessed a cat circus peforming so I suppose there must be).

Click Here! to find how to do it. And not only circus tricks but "normal" behavioral problems are solved. Kingdom of Pets: Complete cat training. Interesting, isn´t it?

You really have a problem cat?

Click Here! to find out what to do.

Ok, one more... Could not resist putting this one here. The title is definitely catchy:
"The Secret art of spoiling you cat rotten - How to pamper your cat".
Click Here! How could you resist, LOL :D

Great Cat Stuff on Amazon 

Others have noticed the beauty and funny nature of cats - just have a look at these books.

Everyday Cat Excuses: Why I Can't Do What You Want

A fanciful, furry and wickedly funny cartoon look at the secret world of Cats, and the excuses they use to pass their time doing only what THEY want-not what YOU want.

Amazon Price: (as of 08/30/2008)

100 Secret Thoughts Cats Have About Humans

I am very much of the opinion that it is not only cats that amuse us. We surely amuse the cats just as much. This interesting book reveals some of the secret thoughts cats have about us. Do you dare to read it ;) ?

I quote: "Human inferiority and how to adopt a rescue human:
Humans actually believe they are the superior species. This delusion explains many of the silly human behaviors that are so frustrating to us. Some of our best friends are humans, but, lets face it, as a species they are very limited."

Amazon Price: (as of 08/30/2008)

Bad Cat: 244 Not-So-Pretty Kitties And Cats Gone Bad

Now this is a book that gave me serious cramps. I laughed so much tears were streaming from my eyes. If ever there were funny pictures of cats... Do yourself a favor and have a look at these cats. Funny pics of cats galore.

Not since Kliban has there been a cat book this edgy. Edgy as in Bosco, the demonic Siamese with the out-of-focus eyes, razor-sharp fangs, and his own idea of Feng Shui. Or the half-shaved freak named Mr. Fliegel, who looks like a cross between a poodle and a lion. Mr. Fliegel shrugs and says, "Chicks dig me." Or Kato, resplendent in his Three Musketeers outfit: "One for all, blah blah blah . . . now just get me out of this @#%&ing costume!" Or Clark, whose hobby is eating other cats' food. Tina, who somehow always just misses the litter box . . . sucker. And the guilty-looking Clarence, caught with a Barbie doll in flagrante delicto. Clarence's defiant defense: "She was naked when I came in. . . ."

Amazon Price: $8.18 (as of 08/30/2008)

101 More Reasons Why a Cat Is Better Than a Man

Well, the title says a lot... Not all, but a lot...

Amazon Price: $7.95 (as of 08/30/2008)

Women Who Love Cats Too Much

Your cat travels by limo.

You hire live-in-help to play with your cat while you´re at work.

(If you recognize yourself, get this book!)

Amazon Price: (as of 08/30/2008)

Great Cat Stuff on eBay 

Cats are everywhere - in eBay too!

Loading Fetching new data from eBay now... please stand by
eBay

New Guestbook 

DonnaChaffins

Wow, your artwork is amazing! Love your cafepress shop!
Donna

Posted February 07, 2008

Bonfire46

Leena, thanks for visiting my lenses and your generous comment! I have to rate your cat lens 5* because kittys have magically stolen my heart as well!
Your horses are beautiful and your love for animals is shared!

Posted February 07, 2008

Netflix Movies 

001- Night at the Museum

Chaos reigns at the natural history museum when night watchman Larry Daley (Ben Stiller) accidentall...
002- The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch & the Wardrobe

Based on C.S. Lewis's classic novel, this enchanting tale follows four London children who are sent...
003- Cars

Prepare to peel out with this revved-up animated adventure featuring classic automobiles, plenty of...
004- Ratatouille

Brad Bird (The Incredibles) co-directs this Oscar-winning Pixar offering, following the antics of a...
005- Happy Feet

Living with his colony in the Antarctic, young emperor penguin Mumble is aptly named: While his frie...
Try Netflix free for 14 days
Rent from Netflix

Interesting links 

My own art
I specialize in horse art, but there are cats too.
My art in prints, T-shirts, mugs, cards, mousepads...
Cafepress has given me a way to express my other art too. Inspirational, humorous, loving, positive art.
Abyssinian cats
I have two Abyssinian cats. The Abys are such a lovely, lively breed of cats. Total nuts sometimes, yes, as they are very lively and loving. I have totally lost my heart to this gorgeous breed and its great affection towards their humans.
Somali cats
I never expected to get a long haired cat. But I wasn´t asked. I was told I was going to get one. By the Somali cat in question himself. And really, I cannot say which one I love more - the Abys or the Somali cats. Have to say my Somali cat must be the most loving creature I have ever met.
X
Leenashorses

About Leenashorses

Actually I am an artist who specializes in horse art (www.leenashorses.com and www.cafepress.com/leenasart). But I am also owned by three cats. There have been four more cats in my life since I was a child, and they will always have a special place in my heart. Cats are such a source of joy I want to share this joy with others too.

Leenashorses's Pages

See all of Leenashorses's pages