"Help For Parents! Discover How Your Child's Behaviour Can Change"

Nine Reasons Why The Behaviour Of Children Might Be Difficult

When dealing with unacceptable behaviour such as child biting, child hitting, disobedience of children etc.

1. unrest between the parents including separation and divorce that the child may take as a personal rejection
2. problems with school work or relationships and feelings of frustration in not being able to tell anyone for fear of being reprimanded or judged
3. too much parental control or authoritative parenting- so that the child doesn't feel able to make their own decisions (and mistakes) and find and be themselves
4. the addition of a new family member (new baby, step parent) that may make them feel excluded
5. frequent comparisons between themselves and their siblings that make them feel inadequate
6. the death of a family member, friend or even pet that can make them feel deserted and let down
7. in the case of foster parenting, the child might be angry at not being able to stay with their birth parents and siblings
8. a lack of attention from busy parents
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Helping Behaviour- 4 Ways To Manage It

A method of Active Parenting that applies to all ages, including parenting teens

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• 1Give them time and undivided attention to sit and talk to you on a regular basis, but without any pressure. Do it in a way that makes them feel valued and special by setting aside time and a nice place (maybe whilst playing together). You might need time to win their trust first before they really start opening up, until they start feeling that you like them and won't judge them or react angrily to what they tell you. This will especially be the case with step parenting or foster parenting.
• 2Give them space to be alone sometimes, with the freedom to cry, yell or smack a cushion to let go of pent up feelings. Don't feel that you always have to run to them to justify how they feel. It's not a matter of who is right or wrong, but of giving them a safe environment to let go. You don't always have to know either. Respect their privacy if they want it. It might not be anything to do with you, but something that happened at school or in the case of foster children, their past home life.
• 3When something unusual happens in the family, be sensitive to their feelings at the same time remembering that you may be feeling emotional too. Learn to respect each other by not allowing your feelings to invade the other person, but at the same time being honest and admitting to your child when you are struggling.
• 4Helping behaviour in a young child: if they are having an anger/temper tantrum they will need to be taken away from other people or things that they could harm and placed in a corner until they have let it go. It is important that they are allowed to let it go in a safe place, (not in a place of fear- e.g. a locked room) but then required to apologise for any unacceptable behaviour before being allowed to leave the corner. Usually one minute for each year of their age is the right amount of time. This should not be seen so much as a punishment as an opportunity to reflect on their actions. When this method is undertaken with consistency, it is a very effective form of child discipline.