Years ago, a great teacher asked me if I was responsible for something that had just "happened to me"?
I so clearly remember her question. I also remember being furious at her question.
After all, I was convinced that the event was just "one of those things" that happened to me and that I, of course, had "nothing to do with it.
In other words, I was a "victim" to the circumstance.
Hmmmmm - a "victim", never a good thing to be.
Yet the the "truth" of the matter was quite different.
In life we can either choose to be at
CAUSE of events....or at their
EFFECT.
Being at "cause" means we actively created them and our life as a whole.
Yet the flip-side, of instead just choosing to be at "effect", means things just happen to us and playing the "victim" card that I chose to play that time.
As Chris puts it, on this side of the equation, " 'I would have done, been, seen, succeeded etc...' if it hadn't been for..."
Choosing to be at "cause" is an
active choice. It really is a decision. And it's one that may, or may not, be based on what is "true", "right" or "real".
But like the rest of the NLP,
choosing to be (and behaving) like we really are at cause in everything in our life helps us create better results.
It can give more choices and opportunities.
In other words, it has the effect of actively empowering us to create our lives in every single moment.
The flip side of being at effect would be the exact opposite....and would often have us feel like we are actually dis-empowered by life's events.
And how exactly can you go from being at effect of something to being at cause?
Well there's a number of different things involved that are covered in BTS.
But even making a conscious decision to "pretend" that you create everything in your life is a great starting point....
So if something
not so positive occurs to you, ask yourself the question, "If I really did create this, what could the 'grander purpose' of my creating it actually be?"
And as tempting as it may sometimes be to say, "Impossible, there's nothing 'grander' or positive about this event....", look again. And perhaps ask the next question, "OK, I know that I can't see it directly....but if I could, and if there was something to be learned from this, what would it be?"
Just asking the question alone will get you focused in the right direction (consciously and unconsciously) and set you up for finding an answer.