Communicating For Fun
If you communicate in a friendly, light-hearted way; this lens is for you. If this description fits you, you probably want to have fun when you interact with other people. You probably feel frustrated when other people do not engage with you.
In this lens, you will gain insights to help you connect and interact with other people in a way that creates more energy and more fun. It contains specific communication tips and techniques to help you connect with people better.
Communicating For Results
Communicating For Harmony
High Value Communication
Wlhat You'll Find In this Lens
- Are you Fast-paced and People-oriented?
- Making the Most of This Lens
- Recognizing Dominant People
- Tips For Communicating With Dominant People
- Recognizing Inspiring People
- Tips For Communicating With Inspiring People
- Recognizing Supportive People
- Tips for Communicating With Supportive People
- Recognizing Cautious People
- Tips for Communicating With Cautious People
- The Most Important Thing You Need to Know
- Other Relevant Lenses
- More Relevant Lenses
- Resolving Conflict in Teams Blog
- Positive Principles Newsletter
- Links to other sites including some FREE stuff
- Books I Recommend
- Your thoughts? Feedback? Comments?
Are you Fast-paced and People-oriented?
If you said yes, then this lens is for you. It has great stuff you can use to have more fun when you interact with people
Making the Most of This Lens
You will get the most from this lens if you focus on the needs of different people rather than on their behaviors.
When you meet other people's needs, they will usually respond well to you. So, if you meet their needs, they will be more likely to relax and lighten-up so that you can have more fun together.
Remember that everyone (including you) is a blend of the four primary behavioral styles. For simplicity, this lens focuses on only the highest trait in each person's blend.
Beware of making absolute statements. In conversation, I say that people tend to_____, generally_____, or often do_____. In the interest of simplicity, I left most of those qualifying statements out of this lens.
So, read through this lens for an overview and then bookmark it for later reference.
I hope that you enjoy applying this information, and that this brings more fun into your life. I've also included a link list with links to some of my other related lenses.
For even more insights to build better connections with other people, check the lenses that represent your secondary styles as well. (For a more complete picture of your behavioral style, complete a DISC personality test.)
Just for reference purposes, I have included the DISC Model overview here.
For more detail see these lenses:
The DISC Model
Connecting With People
Recognizing Dominant People
They are Outgoing and Task-Oriented
These people are like you in that they are fast-paced. They may be different from you in that they are task-oriented. They tend to focus on results more than on relationshipsLook for them to speak at a fast-pace and directly. Expect them to move fast and to make decisions quickly. They probably will not "beat-around-the-bush."
If you don't have much of this style, they may seem aggressive to you. Don't take this as a sign that they don't like you. They may like you very much. They are just focused on results, and often don't worry with "niceties" in conversation.
They need:
- Choices
- Challenge
- Control
Tips For Communicating With Dominant People
They want to know WHAT. They focus on RESULTS.
- Get to the bottom-line quickly. They probably don't want to hear a story.
- Be businesslike and professional. They probably don't want to answer too many non-business related, personal questions.
- Focus on results and actions more than on impressions and feelings. They probably will not relate well to statements like: "I feel that we should do ___________." They would rather have you say: "This is what will happen if we do _____________."
Recognizing Inspiring People
They are Outgoing and People-Oriented
These people are probably just like you. They are outgoing (fast-paced) and they are people-oriented. They love to have fun and to interact with other people. You will probably connect easily.Look for them to speak at a fast-pace and light-heartedly. Expect them to move fast and to make decisions quickly. They might not speak directly, and they may interact on a close, personal level by sharing stories or asking about your family.
They need:
- Recognition
- Approval
- Popularity
Tips For Communicating With Inspiring People
They want to know WHO. They want you to LIKE THEM.
- Help each other stay on task so that you don't "talk each other to death." You will probably enjoy this conversation.
- Listen to their stories so that they feel that you like them. You should be able to do this because you probably do like them.
- Remember to "ask for the order" or to schedule a follow-up meeting. Talking about an issue does not necessarily mean that the task is accomplished or agreed upon.
Recognizing Supportive People
They are Reserved and People-Oriented
These people are like you in that they are people-oriented. They focus on relationships and feelings more than on tasks and data. They are different from you in that they are reserved (slower paced). They dislike direct confrontations and making quick decisions.Look for them to speak rather slowly and softly. Expect them to use gentle gestures and to make decisions slowly. Be patient. Beware of getting too personal, too fast.
They probably will not speak directly, and they may disengage if you move too quickly for them.
They tend to value family and relationship above everything else. They may evaluate you based on how you treat others.
They need:
- Security
- Assurance
- Appreciation
Tips for Communicating With Supportive People
They want to know HOW. They focus on PACE and PEACE.
- Slow down. Give them time to process and think about what you are saying.
- Offer to help them with new tasks, situations, or processess. Be prepared to support them through changes.
- Be careful not to "come on too strong" or to be too friendly, too fast. They want to like you. They just need some time to get to know you.
Recognizing Cautious People
They are Reserved and Task-Oriented
These people will probably be the most difficult for you. They are likely the direct opposite from your natural tendencies. They are reserved (slower-paced) and task-oriented. They want data and facts not emotions and feelings.Look for them to speak in a slower, monotone style. Expect them to move cautiously and to make decisions slowly. They may want more information and validating sources (websites, references, etc.) before making a decision. They tend to speak factually and in measured tones. They generally do not like for people to get too close to them.
Beware of reading their body language and tone to indicate that they do not like you. They don't usually show much emotion on the surface. The harder you work to "make them like you" the more you will probably push them away from you. Just give them some space and time to think.
They need:
- Quality Answers
- Value
- Excellence
Tips for Communicating With Cautious People
They want to know WHY. They focus on DATA and FACTS.
- Give them facts, figures, and validating information (brochures, reports, graphs, websites, etc.), and then give them time to process the information before asking for a decision.
- This one may hurt a little... Cut the stories and socializing. They don't really want to hear your stories. They just want to get down to business.
- They will probably evaluate you on your consistency. For example, timeliness is a big deal to them. If you say a meeting starts at 9 o'clock, it better start at 9 o'clock (not 9:05).
The Most Important Thing You Need to Know
About 2/3 of people are people-oriented like you. So your friendly nature will help you. When you focus your energy and passion as you work with more task-oriented people, they will like you. If you do this, you will have more fun.
Other Relevant Lenses
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Introduction to the DISC Human Behavior Model
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Your leadership style, communication style, and parenting style are heavily influenced by your personality style. The same is true for other people. How you communicate with people, build relationships, raise your kids, network at business meetings,...
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How to Build Rapport With Other People
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Rapport is the deepest level of relationship, and different people move from initial connection to rapport in different ways. Since different people reach rapport by different routes, your success at building rapport with someone can be somewhat hit-...
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Personality Profile Tests For All Ages
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Personality Assessments provide objective and descriptive rather than subjective and judgmental ways to understand our behaviors and behaviors of other people. Taking an online personality assessment gives you the opportunity to learn more about your...
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4 Sure Fire Steps to Connecting With People
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Connecting with other people is the first step in building a relationship with them. Whether you meet people at a business networking meeting, the grocery store, or in your office; you have to connect with them to build a working relationship with th...
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Connecting With People Better
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Connecting with people can often be a challenge. This challenge increases when we attempt to connect with people who are significantly different from us. When you learn a few key communication tips and insights, you can connect with people much more...
More Relevant Lenses
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The Coach - A Leadership Book Written As A Story
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I am passionate about leadership and leadership development. I believe that the health of businesses, non-profits, classrooms, sports teams, and families all hinge on the quality of their leadership. Using a story based approach, I have described key...
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Communicating To Create Peace and Harmony
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If you communicate in a warm, friendly, and patient way; this lens is for you. If this describes you, you probably like to interact with people in a way that creates peace. You probably do not like intense or fast-paced conversations. This lens cont...
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Five Ways to Become a Great Listener
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Great leaders. Great parents. Great supervisors. Great team members. They are all great listeners. Lots of people are great at hearing. Fewer people are great listeners. Listening is a skill, and skills can be learned. Learn great listening skills b...
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High Value Communication Skills
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If you communicate in a factual, unemotional manner; this lens is for you. You probably like for people to communicate with you in a logical and straight-forward fashion. You may get frustrated when they do not deliver high value communication with y...
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Get Better Results From Your Communication With Others
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If you communicate in a direct, bottom-line manner; this lens is for you. You probably want to get immediate results from your interactions. You probably get frustrated when other people do not produce results quickly. This lens contains communicati...
Positive Principles Newsletter
Fetching RSS feed... please stand byLinks to other sites including some FREE stuff
- Principle Driven Consulting
- My website.
- FREE DISC Profile
- FREE Personality Assessment to get an estimate of your personality style.
- Personality Insights
- My friends and colleagues. Great training and resources on this topic.
- JJ Communications
- My friend and colleague in Canada. JJ is a body language and interview specialist.
Books I Recommend
Positive Personality Profiles: Discover Personality Insights to Understand Yourself and Others
Amazon Price: (as of 12/22/2009) 
Sell Naked On The Phone
Amazon Price: (as of 12/22/2009)
How to Win Friends & Influence People
Amazon Price: $10.20 (as of 12/22/2009)
Silver Boxes: The Gift of Encouragement
Amazon Price: (as of 12/22/2009)
Your thoughts? Feedback? Comments?
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Reply
- chillingbreeze chillingbreeze Dec 30, 2008 @ 4:25 am
- Your lens is indeed interesting and helpful. Thanks for sharing this info :)
You may like to spare few minutes at my lenses here :)
http://www.squidoo.com/GetHypnosisInfo
and to share a laugh
http://www.squidoo.com/funny-pictures-and-videos
Thanks for your precious time
Sun
www.SEO-Peace.com
by recoveringengineer
Hi, my name is Guy Harris. I am a trainer, speaker, author, and consultant. I am a certified human behavior specialist and a workplace conflict re... (more)
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