Funny and Cool Facebook Status Ideas
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Funny Facebook Status updates. Ideas for funny facebook statuses!
Are you looking for funny quotes for you status update on Facebook? The ones that will make your friends laugh? You came to the right place! Here you can find the best ideas for cool Facebook statuses! Have fun!
Beside the tips and quotes listed on this page there are also a few very cool and useful links to some other great sites where you can find a lot more funny and awesome ideas for Facebook status updates. Be sure to check them all out! And if you know another one please submit it in a comment! Thanks!
You can also check out 50 Funny Facebook Status Update Ideas, 50 Awesome Facebook Status Update Ideas and Friendship Quotes for Facebook Status Update on my other sites.
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Awesome ideas for Facebook status updates
cool facebook statuses
- Some things man was never meant to know. For everything else, there's Google.
- Aaah! Finally I got a password for my computer other than just "password".
- One should learn how to save water! Go and shower with your neighbor's daughter.
- Have you ever had a fly land on your computer screen and your first
reaction is to try and scare it with the cursor? (I don't know about
you, but I have done this a couple of times). - %u2026isfaci ngamaj orprob lemwi hisspa cebarple asehelp.
- Be nice to nerds. Who knows probably you will be working for them one day.
- I do give the waiters a good tip, but they never seem to take or appreciate my advice.
- Dear Lord, please give me some patience NOW! NOW! NOW!
- Oh hello! I see that the assassins have failed.
- Making some changes to my life. Please leave a message and in case I don't get back, then know that you are one of the changes.
- At the airport customs, if you are asked "do you have any firearms with you?" never reply, "Why? What do you need?"
- What do I do when I see someone extremely gorgeous? I stare, I smile, and when I get tired, I just put down the mirror. Simple!
- Not all men are fools. There are still some bachelors.
- ..is dead. Yet here you are reading her update. What does that make you?
- ... is a big mystery that you can never solve.
- I said 'no' to drugs, but they simply would not listen.
- ... does not suffer from insanity. She is enjoying every minute of it.
- I am proud of myself. I finished the puzzle in just 6 months while the box said 2 to 4 years.
- ... thinks that if your relationship status is "it's complicated", then it's high time that you change it to 'single'.
- My computer beats me at chess. So what? It was no match for me at kick boxing.
- ... is color blind but is still trying to solve a Rubik cube. This could take a while.
- Women who seek to be at an equal level with men, lack ambition.
- Is swearing to drunk that he is not God.
- Bought some batteries for my children as Christmas gift and it has a note that says 'toys not included'.
- Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back ever.
- Children in backseats cause accidents - Accidents in backseats cause children.
- Always remember that stupidity is not a crime, so you are free to go.
- I think, and thus we have nothing in common.
- Statistically speaking, 8/6 people have trouble computing fractions.
- is wondering when can a chicken cross the road without being questioned?
- ... wants to kill the sexiest person alive, but suicide is a crime.
- ....went to the book store earlier to buy a 'Where's Wally' book.
When I got there, I couldn't find the book anywhere. Well played Wally,
well played. - Congratulations! You've just read this sentence.
- Where there is a will, there are 100 relatives.
- ... warns you to be careful with your head, cause once even he had an open mind until all his brains fell off.
- A guy knocked on my door today asking for a donation for the local
primary school's pool. I went away and came back with a cup of water%u2026..
Is that wrong?
Funny Facebook Status Ideas
find even more ideas for funny and cool Facebook status updates
- Funny status updates for Facebook | Blog of Zoso
- Are you looking for funny quotes for you status update on Facebook? The ones that will make you friends laugh? You came to the right place! Have fun!
- Make Money on Facebok
- Tested and proven, taken straight from the real world experiences of the most successful businesses ever to use Facebook to make money and capitalize on Social Media Marketing.
- 50 Funny Facebook Status Update Ideas
- 50 funny and cool ideas for Facebook status updates. Awesome quotes and cool jokes that will surely make your Facebook friends laugh and share your next update.
- Funny Facebook Status Ideas
- More ideas and quotes fro cool and funny status updates for your Facebook wall.
- 50 Funny Facebook Status Ideas
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- 100+ Hilarious Facebook Status Updates
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- Facebook status ideas
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- 60 Best Facebook Status Ideas
- Cool Quotes for Facebook Status Update | Webupon
- Here you have some really cool, funny and interesting quotes to write on your Facebook wall. Include one of these quotes in you next status update on Facebook and make your friends laugh and think.
- 50 Funny Facebook Status Update Ideas | Webupon
- 50 funny and cool ideas for Facebook status updates. Awesome quotes and cool jokes that will surely make your Facebook friends laugh and share your next update.
Cool quotes for Facebook status update
cool facebook statuses
- Before I criticize someone, I walk a mile wearing their shoes! You
know why? Because when they see hear me criticize them, I am a mile
away and I have their shoes! - The most darkest time is just before dawn, so if you are looking to
steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the right time to do it! Lolz - Do you think or feel that nobody in this world cares about you? Well, try missing on some credit card payments!
- The more you learn, the more you know, the more you know, and the
more you forget. The more you forget, the less you know. So why bother
to learn? Hehe ~ Famous Saying - Someday your prince will come. Mine took a wrong turn and is too stubborn to ask for directions. ~ Anonymous
- Out of my mind. Back in five minutes. ~ J.B. Morton
- It matters not whether you win or lose; what matters is whether I win or lose. ~ Weinberg
- All my life, I always wanted to be somebody. Now I see that I should have been more specific. ~ Jane Wagner
- I'm so poor I can't even pay attention. ~ Ron Kittle
- Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, 'Where have I gone
wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one
night. ~ Charlie Brown - Do you wanna know how can you keep your profile visitors under total suspense? I'll tell you tomorrow.
- I'm not as think as you drunk I am. ~ Mega Jones
- I used to have Mad Cow's disease, but I'm alright Nooooooooow. ~ Billy Connolly
- Never test how deep the water is with both your feet! If you have,
just go swimming! If you don't know swimming%u2026why were you testing?? - Always save electricity! How would you feel if someone turns you on and leaves?
- It's good to be in a relationship! After all, you cannot blame everything on God and Government! Lolz
- Never aim of being irreplaceable! If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted!
- Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac ~ George Carlin
- Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway. ~ Anonymous
- The man who can smile when things go wrong has thought of someone else he can blame it on. ~ Robert Bloch
Book with Funny Facebook Status Updates and More
Over 1,000 Categorized Facebook Status Update Ideas
Want to impress your Facebook Friends & Fans? This book has something for every occasion on Facebook. In fact, it has everything you need to become "The Accomplished Facebooker". Get to know the coolest and the not-so-cool status updates, popular Facebook trends and more. This is an unofficial guide to Facebook and is not related to Facebook Inc. in any manner.
Funny Facebook Status Updates and More.
Amazon Price: (as of 05/30/2012)
Features:
- Over 1,000 Categorized Facebook Status Update Ideas
- Guide to Finding Facebook Friends
- How to Score a Date on Facebook
- Top 50 Facebook Statuses of All Time
- Worst Facebook Statuses of All Time
- How to Handle Birthdays & Holidays on Facebook.
Websites with funny Facebook Status updates
Lamebook - Funny Facebook Statuses, Fails, LOLs and More
The Original - Funny Facebook Statuses, Fails, LOL more...5 points
Failbook - Funny Facebook Status Messages ( Failbooking )
Funny Facebook Status Messages and Posts2 points
Funny Facebook Status Ideas
1 point
Best Funny Facebook Status Quotes
cool facebook statuses
- You have the capacity to learn from your mistakes. You will learn a lot today.
- Losing a husband can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible.
- Bigamy: One wife too many. Monogamy: Same thing.
- I am finally old enough to realize my father was right, but now my kids think I am wrong.
- World Population Rank: 1.China 2.India 3.Facebook 4.USA 5.MySpace 6.Indonesia 7.Brazil 8.Twitter
- If you try and don't succeed, cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie.
- An apple a day keeps the doctor away but if the doctor is beautiful throw the apple away!
- This dog is dog, a dog, good dog, way dog, to dog, keep dog, an dog, idiot dog, busy dog, for dog, 30 dog, seconds dog! ... Now read without the word dog.
- Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.
- Some men inherit money, some earn it, and some are lawyers.
- Why don't you understand me like my iPhone does??
- If I were any more single, I'd be a fraction. :)
Funny Facebook Status Quotes and Jokes
cool facebook statuses
I learned law so well, the day I graduated I sued the college, won the case, and got my tuition back.
3 points
If "poli" means many, and "tics" mean bloodsucking creatures, then what does "politics" mean?
2 points
http://www.squidoo.com/super-funny-quotes
Be who you are and say what you feel because those more...1 point
advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't.
http://www.squidoo.com/super-funny-quotes1 point
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but duck when you throw a revolver at him?
0 points
I once cried when I had no Facebook....Then i met someone with no Internet!
0 points
Always get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted a whole day.
0 points
Check our www.nsjbeatz.com for great offer's
Check our website www.nsjbeatz.com for great offer's.I
more...0 points
Reader Feedback
what do you think about these cool facebook statuses?
http://funnyfacebooklaugh.blogspot.com/ WOW! How did you come up with all these? :) hahah nice collection! will surely use them :P
Great Facebook Stuff on Amazon
Funny Quotes on Twitter
share the best and add your own!
Best of:
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- retweet | reply CalBeach
- "If you think no one will miss you when you die, try missing a few car payments." #funnyquote #banks
-
- retweet | reply anugrahchauhan
- I love Jesus. He's born, I get presents. He dies, I get chocolate.#funnyquote
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- retweet | reply anugrahchauhan
- A long journey always begins with words: 'I think I know a shortcut'.#funnyquote
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- retweet | reply anugrahchauhan
- How come Mario can smash through bricks... yet he dies when he touches a freaking turtle!!!???.#funnyquote
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- retweet | reply anugrahchauhan
- Don't you find it Funny that after Monday(M) and Tuesday(T), the rest of the week says WTF?.#funnyquote
-
- retweet | reply anugrahchauhan
- I hear there is scientific proof that birthdays are good for you...the more you have the longer you live.#funnyquote
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- retweet | reply anugrahchauhan
- The good thing abt vodka is tht it looks like water and the good thing abt schools & college is tht water bottles are allowed!.#funnyquo
-
- retweet | reply anugrahchauhan
- Oh look! Your profile picture is a car! I'm sorry, I didn't know you were a transformer!.#funnyquote
-
- retweet | reply anugrahchauhan
- they say that good girls are found in the corners of the earth. UNFORTUNATELY, the earth is round.#funnyquote
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- retweet | reply anugrahchauhan
- Money is the root of all evil! Give me yours and save yourself!!.#funnyquote
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- retweet | reply anugrahchauhan
- Keeping me in mind can be dangerous.. I am Mind-blowing!.#funnyquote
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- retweet | reply anugrahchauhan
- God made MAN, MAN made MATH, MATH made Man MAD! .#funnyquote
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- retweet | reply anugrahchauhan
- The trouble with life is there's no background music..#funnyquote
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- retweet | reply anugrahchauhan
- If a turtle loses its shell.. Is it naked or homeless..!? .#funnyquote
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- retweet | reply anugrahchauhan
- EAR: A place where kids store dirt..! #funnyquote
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- retweet | reply anugrahchauhan
- Don't be so open minded your brains might fall out!.#funnyquote.
Community write-ins:
Write a new tweet for this list! If TilenHrovatic likes it, it could get picked for the best-of list above.
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- retweet | reply tilenhrovatic
- You have the capacity to learn from your mistakes. You will learn a lot today. http://twttrlist.com/16xg
-
- retweet | reply tilenhrovatic
- Some things man was never meant to know. For everything else, there's Google. #quote #funnyquote http://twttrlist.com/16xg
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- retweet | reply tilenhrovatic
- Where there is a will, there are 100 relatives. #quote #funnyquote http://twttrlist.com/16xg
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- retweet | reply tilenhrovatic
- Out of my mind. Back in five minutes. ~ J.B. Morton http://twttrlist.com/16xg
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Funny Facebook Status Updates and More
Funny Facebook Status Updates and More.
Amazon Price: (as of 05/30/2012)
Want to impress your Facebook Friends & Fans? This book has something for every occasion on Facebook. In fact, it has everything you need to become "The Accomplished Facebooker". Get to know the coolest and the not-so-cool status updates, popular Facebook trends and more. This is an unofficial guide to Facebook and is not related to Facebook Inc. in any manner.
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