Wine and Dine in the Strangest of Places (And Live to Write About It)

How unique should the dining experience be? Very, says the restaurants that engage in cutthroat - if not bizarre - tactics just to get ahead of the competition. In the old days, people go to restaurants to eat, to experience cuisine they normally would never get to try in the confines of their homes and from the produce of their kitchen. The emphasis is on the quality of food and how reasonably priced it is; who cares what the waiter is wearing?

Today, times have changed. Restaurants are redefining the dining experience, shifting the focus from the food to the elements around, above, and below it. The same attitude is mirrored by their clientele, especially the rich, the famous, and the ones who aspire to be both. Because most of these clients nurse eating disorders, they go to restaurants more to be seen than to dine, more to make headlines and have their photos splashed all over tabloids than to sample the chef's offerings. In an attempt to gain more of these attention-seeking clients and to draw attention to themselves as well, restaurants are now trying to outdo each other in offering ridiculously unique dining experiences.

Just how unique should one's dining experience be? Take your Cross pen; let's find out!

1. Duvet
A restaurant in New York City called Duvet will surely give you and your Cross pen something to write about. Duvet has customized 30 designer dining beds, turning these into dining areas. As you lounge in bed, you are served a fusion of American and international cuisine and your pick of beverage. To complete the bedroom effect, you will be given bedroom slippers which you should wear as you walk around the restaurant.

2. The Jail
Itching to write about prison life using your Cross pen? You can; and all you have to do is go to Taiwan. A prison-themed restaurant in the country named The Jail comes with a layout that is penitentiary-typical. Think metallic aluminum floor, sliding iron bars, and waitresses playing sexy wardens. Customers have the option of walking to their prison cell on their own or be taken there, handcuffed. Each cell comes with comfortable seats and a dining table where diners can enjoy good food and music.

3. Cabbage and Condom
You value condoms and appreciate the role the vital role they play in your life? But would you consider eating at a condom-themed restaurant? The Cabbage and Condom is certainly one restaurant you could use your Cross pen to write plenty about. Located in Thailand, this popular condom-themed restaurant advocates family planning and safe sex. The menu? Condom-themed dishes such as the condom salad. The decor? Condoms in various textures, colors, and flavors hung on the walls; so you have to be careful how you wield your Cross pen because you just might pop some. Diners are provided with mint and a packet of condoms after each meal.

4. The Dining Dog
You talk to your dog, play with your dog, live with your dog --- so why not eat with your dog, too? Dorothy Moore opened The Dining Dog Cafe in 2005 in Edmonds, WA, U.S.A. Her restaurant is one of the few where dogs and owners can dine together. The menu includes dessert trays, doggie cocktails, and appetizers. A-pet-tizers. Get it?

5. Dick's Last Resort
Take your Cross pen and write this down: to find dicks, go to Dick's. Yes, Dick's Last Resort is the place to go for rude service. Located in Chicago, Dick's boasts of two things: a diverse menu and waiters who are very, very rude to customers. It boggles the mind, naturally, why anyone would deliberately spend for abusive service; but that's not for you and your Cross pen to know. That's between customers and their wallets.

6. Rising Sun Anger Release Bar
If you're under ginormous stress, don't use those pricey engraved Cross pens to perforate your desk or stab a co-worker. Take your trusty Cross pen instead and write about the interesting things you're bound to come across at the Rising Sun Anger Release Bar. This restaurant in Nanjing, China is the only place customers can eat their hearts out and throw tantrums at the same time. They can throw glasses, smash plates, and even hit the waiters - without added costs to their bill!

So just how interesting should the dining experience be? Let's just say you should never try some restaurants without lugging a camera or a few engravable pens along. The camera is for taking photos with; the pens are for writing about how wined and dined in the strangest of circumstances and lived to tell the tale.