Accuse people of "glue sniffing addictions" in public.
Add blank entries to a list, to make it look like it's longer.
Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way".
After visiting the local donut shop, sit on the floor cross-legged and insist in a childish voice that you haven't received enough chocolate sprinkles.
Announce when you're going to the bathroom.
Answer every question with another question. As soon as one of you says a statement instead of a question, shout "I win!".
Any time a member of the opposite sex tries to talk to you, hold your hand up to prevent them from saying anything and say, "Look, I know what you're going to ask me... For the last time, no, I will NOT go out with you."
Arrive at a meeting late, say you're sorry, but you didn't have time for lunch, and you're going to be nibbling during the meeting. Then eat raw potatoes.
As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
As people talk, smell their shoulders.
Ask 1-800 operators for dates.
Ask people to prove everything they say. (e.g. "I'm Bob, nice to meet you..." "PROVE IT!")
Ask people what gender they are.
Ask the waitress for an extra seat for your "imaginary friend."
Ask to "interface" with someone.
Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."
At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batabatabata-suhWING-batter!"
At a restaurant, repeatedly send your food back for changes and after awhile insist that, "This isn't what I ordered!"
At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
At random times in a conversation, say "Hi," "Hello Sir, how are you?" or "Have a good day, thank you."
At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks.
Bark like a dog whenever anyone says the word "the."
Be "in conference" all the time.
Before exiting the elevator, push all the buttons.
Begin all your sentences with "Ohh la la!"
Block the entrances of elevators, buses, and subways.
Bring 15 things into the dressing room.
Bring a portable CD player to a concert and listen the CD because you insist that it is "Just better quality"
Buy goldfish and ask the clerk if they come with chips.
Buy it, wear it, return it.
Buy large quantities of mint dental floss just to lick the flavor off.
Call every girl you know "dude".