Dealing With a Nervous Breakdown

You frequently feel like you are sinking under the weight of your life or generally feel like you're not coping with what you have to do or want to do.

You feel panicky or have panic attacks.

Your sleep patterns are disturbed.

You lose or gain a lot of weight without trying to.

Your concentration markedly deteriorates.

You feel extremely irritable and perhaps snap at people over small things.

You are acting out of character.

Tasks you used to complete almost automatically now feel difficult or insurmountable.

You have low self esteem or a pessimistic outlook.



Identifying one or more of these signs with yourself doesn't automatically mean that you're having or are going to have a nervous breakdown however it does mean that you should start to take notice of problems in your life and give serious consideration to straightening them out. The listed signs are all symptoms of not being able to cope and when that situation arises it means action is needed from you to change your life situation to something that you can cope with and feel satisfied with.

As a general guide to how serious things are think about your daily life, how well you manage to work your way through it and how it makes you feel. If each day is a struggle and you feel overwhelmed then you could well be suffering from depression or anxiety.

Luckily there are many options available to help deal with these effects and to make a recovery.

You don't have to get to the stage where you're actually at a critical juncture to deal with the problems that are causing stress, upset and anxiety, in fact the faster you deal with them the better off you will be.

The sooner a person in an approach to a breakdown or an actual breakdown starts to "pull up" the better it will be. Sadly for some people this never happens and they sink so low that they feel they have no hope for anything from life and either live at a very low level or commit suicide.

Another stigma commonly encountered is the concept that "it's only weak people who have breakdowns" whereas in truth it's usually strong ones. People who take on as much as they can on principle and whose friends and family possibly ask too much of them or believe that no complaints equals no problems, some not realising they are adding weight to a slowly sinking ship and some, unpleasantly enough, just not caring.

The more strong and determined a person is the more likely they are to sink under this weight. They won't wish to do anything that they feel constitutes giving up or letting people down by dropping responsibilities or cutting over demanding and under supportive people out of their lives. If the person is already depressed they may think they don't deserve a better life than the stressful one they have.

It is at this crucial point that someone can AVOID the downward spiral that might ultimately claim their life or at the very least knock it off track and make it very difficult and unhappy for a long time.

The bottom line with a breakdown is that something is wrong with your life, maybe many things, and you can no longer carry on the way you are going. The anxiety and depression which is affecting your abilities and how you feel is caused by these problems. The problem might be work, home, a partner or finances but whatever it is you need to find a way to resolve the issues. The process now becomes a two fold one; find a way of minimising the negative impact that the stress and anxiety is having on you and secondly tackle the underlying causes.

A good starting point is to go to your doctor and get some information about the options open to you.

Medications will be an option but it's important to remember that these are intended to control the effects of your depression or anxiety, they will not make the cause of it go away. If you feel like you need to take medications then research your options fully but do not forget that you won't ever get out of the woods unless you get to the root of what brought the situation to where it currently is.

Alternative to or additional to medication is the option of therapy.

A major benefit of therapy is that it is impartial and professional.

Friends, a partner or relations, for all their good intentions, will advise you from their own perspectives of what they think you should do or what they would do in your place. This kind of interaction is useful for our day to day problems and provides vital support, however if a large crisis is looming then it's not adequate. It's also very possible that the people advising you could be part of the underlying problems themselves!

Imagine if you had a problem with your heart and that it beat irregularly. Would you ask your friends what to do and take their advice while hoping for the best or would you go to a doctor? Of course you'd go to the doctor, advice from friends cannot and should not replace professional medical care!

When in therapy think about what problems you have which may stem from others and discuss these honestly with your therapist.

It's important to not put the cart before the horse and count effects as causes, even though at the time it may seem less painful. If you're drinking to get away from your failing marriage then having alcohol counselling is not going to solve the problem, the marriage problem has to be addressed first.

A range of relaxation therapies exist such as massage, yoga or reiki. Research options and try out therapies until you find something that is having beneficial effects for you.

You may find support from people in a similar situation is effective for you. You can get some good advice through hearing other people's stories and applying relevant information to your own situation.

Additional to or instead of live group meetings you might consider seeking out communities on the internet such as forums or Live Journal communities where you can read posts and if you wish post your own story or query.

In the case of the sufferer being a loved one there is no getting away from the fact that they will need help and support. The possibility does however exist that they will become dependent on help and actually sink further.

Helping someone to do things is much harder than stepping in and just doing it for them but ultimately if you try and live someone else's life for them you will only be making the situation worse.

If you are the one suffering then try to balance taking advantage of the help you need with getting to grips with your life. Use the help to enable you to make changes and carry on. Don't use help to off load your life in the hope that it will go away and not be your problem any longer. This will just cause more complications further down the line.

One of the prime reasons why people have a breakdown is that they are trapped in a situation that is slowly wearing them down and they see no way out of it. It may be that you've become so accustomed to the negative aspects of your life that you think of them as something that cannot be changed.

Via therapy, support groups and personal reflections you will have been able to pin point the factors that were making your life difficult. Whatever the problem or problems are if they are not dealt with fully they may cause you to become ill again at a later date. Even if it does not come to that these negative things will be bringing you down and blocking you from becoming as successful and happy as you potentially could be.

When you feel like you can't cope, your self esteem plummets and you begin accepting things you shouldn't because you believe that you don't deserve better.

Whilst it may seem overwhelming to do things like having serious talks with friends and relatives about their treatment of you, to cut back on work or change the way you work, bear in mind that it's not failing to change things.

Think about how fulfilled you feel in your life. What's most important to you? Do you get time for your hobbies or to work on your life goals?

It may be that you have taken on life goals that just aren't compatible and that some better balance must be found or something dropped completely. Getting to the stage where you having a nervous breakdown is a sure sign that your life isn't right for you and that you need to change it.

In order to make sure you don't have a crisis situation arise, or to ensure that you don't have a re-occurrence of one, it's important to learn and implement a practice of constant assessment and change.

Don't wait until you become very troubled before you face up to problems and start working on solutions for them. Ideally you will get to the stage where you can see problems coming and act to lessen their impact or dissolve them entirely.

Make your physical and mental health one of your priorities and not something that you attend to once everything else is done. The healthier you are in mind and body the better you will be at dealing with any sudden crisis, such as a bereavement, that occurs. If you're skating along on thin ice and just about making it through your day to day life then you get to the stage where any little upset can drive you under.

Making life changes can be scary and if you are in a breakdown then it can seem over facing as well. You may need to change things that have been constant throughout your entire life, however, trying to keep forcing your way down the wrong path will only get harder and harder and more damaging. With some changes that may be difficult initially you can make your life much more successful, enjoyable and healthy for yourself.

At any point of the downward trajectory, even at rock bottom, you CAN build yourself a new life and you can enjoy it. It may take time and it may take effort but it can be done.

Feelings of depression and despair, whilst they feel like they will be there forever, recede as the underlying causes are dealt with and they do go away when the situation has been put right.

Immediate Help.

If you are in crisis, the Samaritans can be contacted 24 hours a day, every day of the week.

www.samaritans.org

In the UK dial 08457 90 90 90.
In the Republic of Ireland dial 1850 60 90 90.

If you are located outside the UK then contact Befrienders Worldwide and use their helplines directory to find the number to call.

http://www.befrienders.org/

Other Useful Numbers.

Mind

Mind helps people take control of their mental health. We do this by providing high-quality information and advice, and campaigning to promote and protect good mental health for everyone.

http://www.mind.org.uk/

0300 123 3393
email: info@mind.org.uk

Mental Health America

With over a century of advocacy, public education, and the delivery of programs and services, Mental Health America is the country's leading nonprofit dedicated to helping all people live mentally healthier lives.

http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/

(703) 684-7722
infoctr@mentalhealthamerica.net.

Mental Health Foundation

The Mental Health Foundation is the UK's leading mental health research, policy and service improvement charity. We are committed to reducing the suffering caused by mental ill health and to help us all lead mentally healthier lives. We help people to survive, recover from and prevent mental health problems.

We do this by carrying out research, developing practical solutions for better mental health services, campaigning to reduce stigma and discrimination and promoting better mental health for us all. Working across all age ranges and all aspects of mental health - we are the charity for everyone's mental wellbeing.

http://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/

Tel: 020 7803 1100
email: mhf@mhf.org.uk