Why do you name your dog?
Dogs need names, otherwise you can't keep them straight. (You could only have one dog in your household, which would help, but who wants only one dog?) So, it's up to you as the human to assign a name to the dog as he joins your household.
There are any number of ways to name a dog. The trick is getting the dog to learn his name after it has been chosen! Simple repetition will usually do the trick here. (Repetition is also why most of the dogs in my house think their first name is "Dammit!")
Now, there are some who believe all dogs are born with a name already, and so the only proper way to determine a dog's name is to place him on one side of the room and call random names until he responds. This could take a very long time. Nonethess, for those with a lot of spare time, it would require less effort than actually choosing a name.
A faster method is to give your dog a name, and then just train him to reply to it.
The major issue with a dog's name (much like a spouse's) is that is has to be relatively easy to pronounce loudly in case of emergency, as in when they are getting into something they shouldn't.
Also, I'm a firm believer that all dogs should have a middle name. Now, this may be my Southern upbringing ("Murphy" is actually "Murphy James", as in "Bobby Sue" or "Billy Bob"), but you have two names (or more, if from the Northeast or money), so why not your pet?
The "Horrify a Family Member" Method
Bubba Elvis Gilhooly
This is Bubba. When we first received Bubba from my brother-in-law, my wife had just moved to Texas from New Jersey (she's a Brooklyn native.)Bubba was born in Virginia, driven to New Jersey, and then flown home to Dallas. That was a lot of non-Texas he had to overcome in a very short time!
The simple way to help Bubba become Texan was to give him a good Texan name, like "Bubba".
The fact that it horrified his mom (as she considered yelling "Bubba" out the back door in a Brooklyn/Jersey accent) was a major bonus. (In our neighborhood, there really aren't a lot of Bubbas. Yelling "Elderly" out the door would have had more effect.)
After she calmed down, she thought his hair looked like Elvis', so Elvis became his middle name.
The "Just Leave It Alone" Method
Ripley J Gilhooly
This is Ripley. He used to be "Ridley", which may be from some science fiction movie. He was left at a shelter in West Texas, and then rescued by the Richardson Humane Society.We adopted him from the Richardson Humane Society, who had changed his name to "Ripley" before we met.
Ripley was a pretty good name for him, so we just left it. I gave him "J" as a middle initial, but nobody knows what it stands for. This was before I realized that The Simpsons did the same joke with Homer J Simpson.
The "Do Proper Research" Method (Thinking Hurts!)
Murphy James Gilhooly
This is Murphy. When we first met him, he was named Java because he was coffee-colored.Where I work, Java is a programming language for computers, so I didn't think that was a very good name. Besides, he wasn't so much coffee-colored as Guinness-colored, but that may just be my beverage preferences showing.
However, he's not an Irish breed (he's an American Cocker Spaniel), so Guinness was probably not a proper name for him. Plus, it's too long, and it's hard to yell, and he's a puppy, so yelling was probably going to be required. (Puppies actually respond better to gentle commands, but puppies generally cause shouting. So it goes.)
My other favorite stout is Murphy's Irish Stout, so I started there. I thought Murphy was a pretty good name, but then he needed a middle name. I found the Murphy's site on the Internet and the founder's first name was "James." So, he became Murphy James. "Murphy James" is also a really easy name to say when annoyed, but that was a bonus. (Ironically, enough, James Murphy's middle initial was "J" just like Ripley.)
Murphy also has lots of potential nicknames like "Murf-a-letta."
The "Stream of Conciousness" Method
Sparkplug Ulysses ("Sparky") Gilhooly
This is Sparky (he's unfortunately no longer with us.) His name was "Sam" when we adopted him, but I didn't think he was a Sam. Some of these things you can just tell.The Spousal Unit wanted to call him "Sparky" but he looked like a "Sparkplug" to me - I don't know why, it just popped into my head instead of "Sparky". My wife hated that name, so she asked all the vet techs about it, and they all loved it. This annoyed her greatly, so she maintained his name was "Sparky."
I wanted him to have a distinguished name, so I gave him "Ulysess" as a middle name. I thought that was a very good compromise. We all called him Sparky, but I knew he was a Sparkplug.
The Literal Method
"The Grey One"
My mother-in-law could never remember Sparky's name, but he was constantly getting in trouble around her. In fact, he "marked" her walker at least twice while he was waiting for her to drop some food.Since she couldn't remember his name, she would just complain about "the grey one."
Luckily, he was the only grey dog in the house at the time, or this system would have fail.
Update: The system does fail! Now that we have Katie and Ripley who are both PBGV mixes and both brown dogs, my mom-in-law gets very confused. She would have to be able to flip the troublesome one over so she could say "the brown boy" or "the brown girl." Luckily, Ripley is pretty sedentary, so we know "the brown one" means Katie.
The "Going for Cutsie" Method (Not for Guys, Probably)
Flower "Pot" Pesce
This is Flower, my mother-in-law's Shih-Tzu, who is the oldest dog in the house, but still acts like a puppy. My Spousal Unit named her "Flower" because she thought she looks like Flower, the skunk in Bambi, so this is almost the "proper research" category, or perhaps "stream of conciousness". However, the name is Flower. Sheesh. Now, I never saw the movie, so who's to judge?I started a rumor that her middle name is "Pot", so people call her Flower-Pot now. That's a bit better.
The "Complicated Bad Joke" Method
Maximilan Sebastian Gilhooly
Max was abandoned at the Denton Shelter, and when we met him, he didn't even have a name, just a number.His (soon-to-be) Mom (i. e. my Spousal Unit) saw his photo on a rescue list and thought he looked like Ripley (see above.) The next note about him mentioned something about euthanasia, so we decided to pull him from the shelter. (Thanks to ELPO for the assistance!)
Since he didn't have a name, only a number, we could name him anything we wanted.
I suggested "Threshold" since we were crossing the threshold on the number of dogs we said we would have, but that's a stupid name.
The Spousal Unit suggested "Maximum", another stupid name, but a good starting point. If you wanted to call a dog "Max", you wouldn't call him "Maximum", but you could call him "Maximilian." Voila! She gave him "Sebastian" as a middle name, even though he already has one long name. Thankfully, around here, he's just our "Max."
Max was pulled from the shelter and went into isolation, in order to recover from a case of kennel cough, and in order to get neutered after he was better.
Unfortunately, Max never made it out of isolation. He passed away from distemper and parvo while still at the vet. Are your pets vaccinated?
The Dedication Method
Kaitlin Renee Gilhooly
Kaitlin ("Katie") was named after two of the key ELPO people who helped us try to save Max. Katie and Renee went above and beyond to try to keep Max around.Katie was rescued from the same shelter as Max, and survived two weeks of quarantine plus a case of ringworm. She even survived two weeks of isolation at home so the other dogs could acclimate.
She's a terror.
She could almost be Max's sister. They're about the same age, from the same area, and pulled from the same shelter. Plus, they both look like Ripley.
Welcome, Katie!
Wear our dogs!
Featuring Our Dogs
You know their names, now wear the t-shirt!
Pet Books On Amazon
Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Dog Days
Amazon Price: $5.25 (as of 12/22/2009) 
What the Dog Saw: And Other Adventures
Amazon Price: $11.25 (as of 12/22/2009)
The Art of Racing in the Rain: A Novel
Amazon Price: $8.99 (as of 12/22/2009)
Nubs: The True Story of a Mutt, a Marine & a Miracle
Amazon Price: $10.52 (as of 12/22/2009)
Inside of a Dog: What Dogs See, Smell, and Know
Amazon Price: $14.97 (as of 12/22/2009)
by SparkyDad
Kevin is President of Sparky's Pals (a Dallas, Texas 501(c)(3) non-profit humane education corporation dedicated to assisting those who help
pets find... (more)
pets find... (more)
Explore related pages
Siberian Husky Dog Lover Gifts- Learn all about your favorite Working Group dog, the Siberian Husky, read some f...
How To Take Care of Dogs- Do have a dog? You are like many around the world that love to take care o...
My Dog Sleeps With Me- The benefits and the hazards associated with pets in your boudoir. Have the exp...
Holistic Health for Pets- Help your furry or feathered or scaled companions in times of stress or ill heal...
Chihuahua Dog Lover Gifts- Learn all about your favorite little Toy Group dog, the Chihuahua and also see L...
Cavalier King Charles Spaniels- The Cavalier King Charles Spaniel is a dog for people from all walks of life. Be...
