Help Stop Domestic Violence
Has domestic violence affected your life?
Would you know a domestic violence victim who was in need of help if you were talking to her right now?
Would you even know HOW to help?
Look at my photo. Do I look like a domestic violence victim? A survivor?
I am (a survivor).
This is not said to encourage sympathy. My point is that you simply cannot tell when someone is being abused. Appearances often do not reflect the inner turmoil someone may be experiencing.
This page was created in the hope that I can encourage others to get out of their abusive relationships. I also hope to educate the general public about this very ugly and very misunderstood issue.
Abuse constitutes far more than physical harm. In fact, many d.v. survivors say the physical abuse is the easiest part of it to bear.
In this page I will explore the types of domestic violence, as well as provide information and resources for domestic violence victims and those who wish to help stop the violence.
Important Numbers! This Comes First!
The National Domestic Violence Abuse Hotline
1-800-799-SAFE(7233)
1-800-787-3224 (TTY)
website:National Domestic Violence Hotline Website
National Sexual Assault Hotline
1-800-656-HOPE(4673)
Types of Domestic Violence
However, it can also be emotional or psychological battering.
And it can also be done by women to men.
Abuse includes any situation where one person uses any form of negative control over another person.
Abusers often beat down their partners' self-esteem through derogatory comments about their looks or intelligence.
They may limit who their partners are allowed to talk to or go out with.
Abusers may force a partner to leave a job or school through use of threats.
These forms of verbal and emotional abuse are often not seen by outsiders and, even if they are, may not be considered abuse.
Educate Yourself
Yes, it is an ugly subject we don't want to acknowledge.
But the more you know, the more you can help.
Breaking Free from Boomerang Love: Getting Unhooked from Borderline Personality Disorder Relationships
Amazon Price: $17.95 (as of 07/06/2009) 
Usually ships in 24 hours
The Verbally Abusive Relationship: How to Recognize it and How to Respond
Amazon Price: $10.85 (as of 07/06/2009)
Usually ships in 1 to 3 weeks
Abused Men: The Hidden Side of Domestic Violence
Amazon Price: $29.56 (as of 07/06/2009)
Usually ships in 24 hours
Stop the Violence!
I stayed in an abusive relationship for 3 long years and whenever I tried to talk about it, people made it into a small unimportant complaint.
Wear this shirt to remind others to do whatever they can to Stop the Violence!"
Domestic Violence Shelters
What are they REALLY like?
Shelters can either be dorms with several people to a room, sleeping on cots, or larger facilities where each resident has more privacy. I have read about shelters which provide private rooms, but at this time cannot list a specific location in this category.
Regardless of the sleeping arrangements, at least in a shelter you know no one is going to beat you or your children!
You will live with people from all age groups and all ethnic backgrounds. Look at this as an opportunity to educate yourself about the world.
Some shelters have mandatory classes and counseling programs while others provide these more on a volunteer attendance basis.
Almost every city has a shelter nearby!
Ways to Make a Difference
How YOU Can Help Domestic Violence Victims
Here are just a few suggestions for you to contemplate:
Did you know you can donate old cell phones to be recycled as emergency 911 phones? Domestic violence shelters usually hand these out to their residents and support group clients. It is a free way for them to call 911 (the only number which this phone CAN call) if their abuser approaches them.
Consider donating your unused clothing and accessories to shelters. Some of the women and children here have next to nothing...no clothing, no money, no toys for their kids.
Consider donating nonperishable food items Shelters often operate on low budgets, and these donated foods can provide meals for residents in times of need.
Consider giving a cash gift to a local (or national, if you prefer) domestic violence organization.
Former domestic violence victims may want to consider asking if they can speak as a guest at support group meetings to help encourage victims who are just finding the strength to get out and get help. I have found this difficult because many shelters will not give you their locations for safety reasons. You may have to contact them by phone and ask to speak to a program director.
Speak up, be brave.If I witness a man mistreating a woman, I often ask the woman if she is all right. I let her know that she does not need to accept that kind of treatment. Always do this in a public place in as non-confrontational manner as possible to avoid provoking her abuser.
Sadly, many victims of domestic violence do not even know that they deserve to be treated with respect. Some of them have never known anything other than abuse! Your words may encourage them to look for alternatives.
Domestic Violence Awareness Products
bid on items to stop the violence
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Has DV Affected Your Life?
Take a moment to respond to the poll and let us know if and how domestic violence has affected YOUR life. Then stop and take a moment to think of ways you could make a difference.
Products to Support Awarness
Other Resources and Info
- Purple Ribbon Project
- The International Purple Ribbon Project
- Purple Light Nights
- - domestice violence has no place in our communities!
A local Washington state site that can be adapted for YOUR community - Support Women's Empowerment
- Mission To Morocco is an effort to raise funds to participate in an overseas program for women's empowerment hosted by the respected agency Cross-Cultural Solutions.
Name your donation level!
Purple for Domestic Violence Awareness
October is National Domestic violence Awareness Month!
The color purple has represented domestic violence awareness for over twenty years.
You can buy and wear a purple ribbon to show your support and help raise awareness of the issue in your community.
Connect
I would love to hear from others who have left abusive relationships.
And from their families and friends.
And from anyone who supports this lens. Star ratings and lensrolls encouraged.
Relevant links most welcome!
PennyAsh wrote...
The more people stand up about this the more people will be encouraged to get help. Two cousins are survivors.
Posted June 03, 2009
JustBon-Crochet-Designs wrote...
Essential reading for everyone. I have been there and I got out. I hope your lens helps others in a similar situation. 5*s.
Posted May 26, 2009
jacquelinestone wrote...
Great lens, and you have no idea how many people you'll help by having this here.
Please consider joining Healing from Abuse Headquarters.
Posted May 25, 2009
ElizabethJeanAllen wrote...
Merry Christmas from the Totally Awesome Lenses Group.
Lizzy
Posted December 23, 2008
qlcoach wrote...
Great lense of course! You are a Giant Squid. I do counseling with couples and it is really hard to teach them anger management skills at times. Hope you will see how I try to help others in new ways too. Sincerely: Gary Eby, author and therapist.
Posted November 03, 2008
Tipi wrote...
Very nice of you to put this topic on a lens. it's a tough one for many to read, but helpful resouces are needed. - I grew up with loving parents and have been very greatful for that. I know so many that were abused and as adults they have many problems in life. I feel for them! (*****)
Posted October 26, 2008
CrypticFragments wrote...
in reply to lakeerieartists very true...I was never abused as a child but I was also never given the love and support that help people grow into confident relationship-ready adults, and that is why I began seeking love any way I could get it...tainted love seemed better than no love for several years before I realized how wrong it was and sought help!
Posted October 26, 2008
lakeerieartists wrote...
Wonderful resource. The older I get, the more thankful I am that I have "normal parents" that is parents who cared for me and still do, and gave me the support I needed to become a strong individual that sought out "normal" relationships with supportive men. So many people start out on the negative side with abuse from day one as a child, then walk right into it as an adult.
I have seen it in co-workers and have a very good friend who is still struggling with the results of an abusive childhood.
Posted October 26, 2008
QueSea wrote...
Very nice lens. Take look at what we're doing to prevent domestic violence in Northern Michigan.
http://www.nwm.org/mpri.asp
Quesea
Posted October 25, 2008
