Moving on and looking forward!

6 page Readers' Digest Article October/November 2007 featuring myself and "S".

I have so many 1000's of pictures from every corner of the country - for some reason this is one that remains in my memory... I HAVE NEVER WALKED SO MUCH IN ONE DAY IN ALL MY LIFE!

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"The transition and new circumstance - journeying down the path of the single parent"

You are also growing and changing throughout this process. You will realize it, your kids will know and see it, as will others. This is another change you and everyone around you have to deal with as well, on top of everything else.  You might also feel anxious, lonely, and angry or evoke these emotions in your child/family.  Again this is quite normal and natural behavior.

"Seeing things from the child's point of view"

This is not only all about you either. Try and see things thought the eyes of your child sometime and whole new worlds of understanding and possibilities will open for you.

This beautifully presented, and informative eBook, comes with Master Resell Rights.  That means once you have purchased it you may re-sell it for a profit from your own website or blog.

Donnette Davis


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Although born in South Africa, I was raised and educated for the most part in what was then Rhodesia. Attending 11 schools in 7 years, and always being the "new kid on the block" meant having to adjust to new situations, circumstances and institutions constantly. My father, a professional, traveled throughout Africa and was often away from home for long periods of time, leaving the raising of the children to my mother. (never realized then what working full time and raising a family alone meant for a woman!)

We were raised in Rhodesia during the height of the African Terrorism Bush War, and lost many friends and family to this war. From a young age we were exposed to terrorism and the consequences of it on a large scale, with having curfews, having to travel in convoys, rations for petrol, food, shortages of simple things in life that often we take for granted. A few of the things that automatically come to mainly seem to begin with P (What's up with that?) Paper, pepper, paint, petrol. I remember having to write on recycled newsprint paper at school when ordinary paper was no longer available - out with fountain pens and early introduction to the ballpoint pen - which in those days left blotches everywhere - oh my work looked like a dog's breakfast! The ballpoint took some time to master.

I used to sneak into dad's Magic Cupboard where he kept Brandy, after telling my parents constantly that I had the most chronic toothache, and needed to dip a cotton ball in brandy to ease the pain. There was actually nothing wrong with my teeth - I had lovely teeth. *Big Smiles* What was contained hidden in the cupboard with the Brandy was of more interest to me. It was the time that I was 11 to 13 years old. Inside the Magic Cupboard were books, leaflets, pamphlets, magazines - many of them. Not for the eyes of the sensitive, and certainly not for the eyes of children. I knew where to find them.

My "favorite" publication was called Anatomy of Terror. It was a small magazine that was printed on an issue basis, highlighting the plight of the victims of terrorism in Rhodesia, and pointing out ways of protecting your family, new ways that terrorists would infiltrate the cities and towns and generally what was happening in the more rural areas of the country. It was sickening. Like an accident, we don't want to see pain and suffering, we don't want anyone to experience it, but drive past an accident and natural curiosity gets the better of you. I would read and re-read these publications. I will not go into graphic descriptions of what the content was, save to say that I would often find myself throwing up reading about and seeing the pictures of what one human being could do to another. The children seemed to be not only the casualties, but very often the targets and the weapons. We left Rhodesia in 1977, and traveled (in our really ugly Peugot 404) having sold everything the family owned to take out the $1000 we were allowed to take to leave and returned to South Africa, giving away anything and everything that took us above the $1000 limit. 4 daughters to raise, the parents decided it was time to return to our home country.
In 1977 my parents decided that the situation was that bad, and deteriorating. We left.

South Africa was a difficult adjustment, also moving around a lot in order to finally find somewhere and settle which we did after about 3 years. At that time the South African Defence Force was actively involved in the Bush War and it was compulsory for men from the minority ethnic groups to undertake 2 years military service, or spend their 2 years in prison. While removed from the immediate dangers of the terrorism that we were faced with on a daily basis in Rhodesia, the whole country was involved in this bush war, regular trips to the train station seeing off friends and loved ones, all packed up, some as young as 18 years old, watching the 8 o'clock news every night diligently for updates.

We lost many, casualties and fatalities were high. Our men, although well trained were no match for those who were trained in bush warfare. Commando Units were formed where we were to volunteer our services, to protect our cities and families if the need arose and as a result many women became members of the Commando Units, undergoing military training. We became adept at dismantling and putting together an R1 rifle, leopard crawling through mud along with some other really Bruce Willis-type manoevures that if I attempted now I would probably end up breaking a bone or putting my back out - the shooting range became a regular gathering spot on Saturdays and we were ready to protect and serve our communities.

Sending care packages and parcels to our friends and family was a source of great joy to many, and we did so as often as possible, knowing that the conditions were difficult and that the men in uniform would appreciate any little piece of home.

Sadly we lost many close friends. The first I knew that I had lost a dear man whose family was very close to ours was while watching the news one evening in May 1985 and seeing through a haze the headlines "Killed In Action : Mark Anthony Pond". The irony of Mark is that he was never conscripted to the SADF. He was a Rhodesian citizen. He actually volunteered to do 2 years' military service when he moved to South Africa from Rhodesia. He was trained to become and became a highly competent tracker and led his men with pride, safety and valour - until 2 weeks before his stint was over, he was caught in an ambush in Angola and he gave his life to the service of a country he had yet to experience as a regular resident.

So I read a lot, I write a lot, have watched many videos and movies and I have an intense interest in the war on terrorism, human rights, International Military, particularly the USMC, who are said to be the "Best FIghting Force in the World"... It seems to me that this cannot be and is not often argued. I am not a political person, just a simple person with an interest in the world that my children have to grow up in.