Dr. Writer Mom - Random Musings, Mostly Humorous, of a Cluttered Mind

I am a forty-something year old woman who has switched her career focus from internal medicine to freelance humor writing. That's a pretty risky proposition for someone who basically has enough student loan debt to finance a small house. Obviously, I need to find a way to make my humor submissions stand out and be noticed if I hope to get paid. I think I've found my angle : The Desperate Humorist's Ultimate Cover Letter. It reads as follows:

Hello, and thank you for taking the time to read my submission, Insert generic submission here.

Now, I'm sure you're wondering why your publication needs the work of of a forty-something year old physician slash mother slash wife slash humorist. Well, it all boils down to one thing, really. Take that person out of her office, trap her in a house with 2 adolescents, two dogs, seven birds (five of which can talk), and only let her out for occasional airings, and you get some mighty fine works of humor, worthy of publication. WHY? Because in such an environment, I can either find the humor, laugh and then write about it, or I can let it out in other ways, ways involving unflattering orange jumpsuits and an unacceptable loss of personal freedom. Then, the only notoriety I will have will be on Court TV's Forensic Files, and that's just not the way I want to leave my mark.

Why do I need your publication, Insert Generic Publication Here, to publish my work? Two words - STUDENT LOANS. Sallie Mae® is worse than any ex-spouse when it comes to monetary demands. She wants my money. I need to make some. Please pay me.

If you don't find my work suitable for use at this time, please consider this cover letter a separate , because it's the funniest thing I've written all day - thus giving this fine publication another good reason to pay me. Please?

Sincerely,

Insert Generic Name Here

Humor meets financial desperation - here's hoping it works!

©2006 Kathleen M. Wooton, M.D.

My Blog at a Glance

Because somes a simple explanation is not enough!

Why click on a link when you can see my blog here? I don't care how you get there to read it, as long as you read it!

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My Writings, On the WWW

I'm on the web - it's a far cry from my office!

Get to know me - my writings can be found at Savvy Women's Magazine, Kathy's Kaleidoscope, and on my blog, Dr. Britcom Mom. Have a look - I promise, you will laugh!

Kathy's Kaleidoscope - Humor Columnist Kathy Wooton Has Her Say: We are delighted to have Kathy Wooton MD as our guest humor columnist, read her stories here
My Blog at Blogspot.com: Dr. Britcom Mom's Blog - Life musings, mostly humorous, of a mother/wife/physician/ humorist.

Places Worth Visiting

Everything from Apples® to zoology - have a look!

My interests are varied, as are these links. Have fun browsing!

Apple®: This page was created using Apple® technology. Get to know the Apple® in all of its incarnations, and find your next computer!
Erma Bombeck Writers' Workshop: The official website of the Erma Bombeck Writers' Workshop, from the University of Dayton.
"Gordon Kirkland At Large & Online": Quite possibly THE funniest humorist in all of North America!
"THE O-fficial web site of Jill Conner Browne's Sweet Potato Queens": Website of THE Boss Queen, Jill Conner Browne. Come and be indoctrinated into Queenliness!
"Tim Bete -- Award-winning parenting humor columnist and author of "In The Beginning There Were No Diapers": He is an amazing, family-oriented humorist and director of the Erma Bombeck Writers' Workshop. Read his work - he's the genuine article!
"Susan Reinhardt~Not Tonight, Honey Wait 'til I'm a Size 6": This is one hailarious humor columnist! And one of the nicest people you ever want to meet. Read her stuff, buy her book - you won't regret it!
Animal Planet: Animal Planet - educating our young ones on the importance of wildlife conservation, and respect for domesticated animals.
Danny Gallagher - Humorist, Journalist and Author of "Movies That Suck".: Part serious crime reporter, large part seriously funny humorist, and the man responsible for "Movies That Suck". His stand up act is knock down FUNNY!

Salon - Catch The Latest Here!

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