Are any of these present?

1. Having To
   
2. Needing To
   
3. Wanting To
   
4. Should
   
5. Looking good/avoid looking bad
   
6. Being right/avoid being wrong
   
7. Justify oneself/invalidate another
   
8. Winning/avoid losing
   
9. Avoid risk
   
10. Avoid responsibility

The Self is never concerned. Don't forget, the Self lives in the formless, where abundance is the rule, and there is no place to get. The Ego, on the other hand, lives and knows only of the Form World, which is where we all live, physically, the world of scarcity, the world of getting some place.

So if you seem to be concerned (worried or driven) about or for anything, you are in the Ego's grips.

If you paid attention to the first four of the list, you'll notice that all the rest come from there.

Some of the very recognizable concerns are for Having to, Needing to, Wanting to, and Should.

Now, if you look at your life, it is probably ALL about these four.

When you are in the grips of the Ego, your chances for freedom are nil. This foursome is an effective way to keep you in slavery.

Another aspect of these four: they are all concerned with the future. They take you out of the present moment, which is the only moment that exists.

Acting on any of these urges causes dissatisfaction, once when you can't/won't, once when you accomplish what you are after. It is a no win.

I have heard of this distinction before, and I have attempted to benefit before.
I was interested in learning to stop resisting "stuff" because I could feel the pain of resisting. I could also feel how people got turned off by me resisting.
My life's purpose: being able to influence people to their benefit, could not be realized with that dynamic between people and me resisting.
On the past few webcasts, many of the live questions dealt with this issue. I paraphrase the essence of the questions: "I am quite transformed, I can be in the present, until..." The words that come after the "until" vary, it can be a relative with a huge pain-body, a child who screams and refuses to eat, a boss who criticizes you... you can add your own. My biggest one was my cat who wants to go in and out... while I am trying to get my life's work done... conflict, right?

Anyway, it was very windy all night. Last night I had difficulty falling asleep, so I told myself... "don't resist the wind" so I was watching the branches of a tree as they were wildly waving in the wind. I fell asleep within a minute... miracle.

The wind got even stronger today. I felt strong pain in my neck and in my shoulders, so I knew I was resisting the wind again. So I deliberately stood in front of a window and allowed my body to go with the wind... you know, wave in the wind. The wind was blowing and my body was gently swaying with it, and the tension started to become joy. Aliveness. Bliss.

After so many years of trying to get it, I just got it.

You allow yourself to sway, to dance with the music. A music you dance with isn't irritating, somehow.

Now, warning, I did not say "dance TO the music". That would be giving your life over to that music, as if you are playing it too. But even "evil" music can be fun to dance with, if you don't dance to it.

Impatience, frustration, lots of physical and emotional problems, anger, disappear and you get back yourself almost instantly. And you need yourself, your clarity of mind, your calm breath, your focus, for the things you wanted to do, before the irritation began. OK?

Let me know how this works to you. Talk back to me....

This article is going to be eclectic: I am taking methods and distinctions from Werner Erhard, from Robert Fritz, from Eckhart Tolle... and of humble myself... hey, after 22 years of transformational coaching I do have my own methods and distinctions!

I am going to recount a conversation from yesterday: this way you'll have an example or two, plus what I did to loosen the grip of procrastination.

During the group project, one of the participant became restless and spiteful. He loved what we were doing, building a strong foundation, yet, a part of him kept interrupting the process by urging us to do something that will make him a quick 6 grands.

Instead of continuing as if nothing happened, I chose to address the issue.

This project takes approximately 12 hours a week... of the 168 possible hours. There is plenty of time to make money while we are building a foundation for a new business that -- if it is well constructed -- will make money, almost on auto-pilot for years and years and years.

... I got interrupted... I'll get back to this as soon as I can... OK? ooops.