Romantic Gifts: Fairies, Not Flowers

My husband met his first wife when he was stationed in Thailand during the Vietnam conflict. He told me that the first time he bought her flowers, she burst into tears and said, "You give me flowers. You want me to die!"

I have to admit being really curious about this, so I did some more research. I learned that most people in Thailand are very superstitious and many of these beliefs center around death and ghosts. There are whole lists of things you should do or not do to avoid bringing bad luck. For instance, " Do not smell the flowers that you are going to offer to the monk. Something bad will happen to your nose." (from Superstitions from Thailand by Richard Barrow)

But what about romantic flowers? Can a man buy a Thai woman flowers? An article called "Dating and Romance Thai Style."warns a man wishing to date a Thai woman that many Thai girls feel that flowers are a waste of money. If a man does buy flowers, they should be white or red. "Yellow is in mourning so don't give her those as yellow blooms are for funerals."

I asked my husband if he had bought his first wife yellow flowers. His answer? "Probably."

Valentine's Day is now a big holiday in Thailand. According to an article on the website, Things Asian, Thailand is "madly in love with Valentine's Day" and roses are a very popular gift.

Because of the trauma of the whole incident, he found it very difficult to buy flowers for any woman after that. That put me in a dilemma. I like to get flowers, but had never been with a man that liked to give them. My first husband considered them extravagant. So my current husband came up with a beautiful idea; instead of flowers he gives me fairy figurines.

This is a good example of the Ripple Effect. We never know how much our actions affect others. In this instance, many years separate two events. Yet if I had my heart set on flowers, I might feel angry at someone I don't even know. Instead, we turned what might have become a source of contention between us, into something fun that we can share.

So began our tradition. On special occasions or for significant events, I get a new fairy. Sometimes I pick them out myself, and sometimes it is a surprise. I have several bookshelves full of colorful fairies. Many of them have particular meaning to me. For instance, there is the fairy that I received after having breast surgery. I have fairies commemorating anniversaries and birthdays.

I have a fairy riding on a squirrel and one riding a unicorn. I have a gnome riding on a goose, as well. I also have a wood nymph, a holly fairy, a sea fairy and an earth fairy. Some sit on mushrooms, some on flower petals. One sits on a park bench. There are even little baby fairies. Each is special in his or her own way, and each is a reminder of how much my husband loves me. For unlike flowers, they do not wilt and die, but provide me with pleasure and happiness each day.

I love watching the puzzlement on the faces of the sales clerks when my husband goes into a store and says, "I'm looking for flowers for my wife." We both know he means fairies, but they are clueless how to help him until we explain our tradition.

On Valentine's Day in 2009, I received two fairies from the Boyd's Fairiesprite Collection. See them in the above picture.

Surprise! I got another fairy in 2010, There she is in the picture below. She is now sitting on my desk at work.

Update Dec 2011 - We needed to pare down our possessions in preparation to become full-time RV-ers. So there won't be any new fairy figurines, at least for awhile. But hey, there are always fairy t-shirts!

Medieval Fairy Gothic Valentine Sculpture
CLICK HERE TO ORDER

lorikarelsart Gallery on Zazzle

L'amour Fairy

Baby Dragon Fairy

Blue Fairy

Midsummer Eve, c.1908
Edward Hughes
Buy From Art.com

This is a another piece of art from Lori Karels Online Gallery.