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Family Caregiver: Tips-Encouragement-Useful Links

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I pray that this blog is a blessing and inspiration for the caregiver and helps those who know caregivers have a better understanding of the caregiver's life. I'm a family caregiver too. That's why I understand how a caregiver feels. When you become a family caregiver your whole world is turned upside down. Plans, goals, and dreams are disrupted and some even have to be postponed until your care giving role ends, because your role is to put the one you are caring for first. It is a unselfish sacrifice, while also being a tremendous blessing!

"Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends." John 15:3

My purpose in publishing this Squidoo lens is to reach out to other family caregivers with encouragement and to share experiences and what has and has not worked, as we as family members of a loved one, suddenly find ourselves in the role of family caregiver with no prior experience and having to figure it out as we go. To encourage one another as our careers and priorities are drastically changed when caring for a loved one as we find it is emotionally, physically, and financially draining, as we receive no financial compensation, but give our services for the loved one we are caring for out of a heart of love, dedication, and compassion. Sharing with others going through the same life challenges benefits all of us. I welcome your comments, so please leave a comment.

I care for my 86-year old (2011) father, who: has COPD with emphysema terminal lung disease; is in moderate to severe stage Alzheimer's disease; has heart valve damage from one of two heart attacks; has had a mild stroke; had retina reattachment surgery a few months ago to save him from going blind; and a myriad of other health problems. My only sister is deceased and I have no other immediate family, except for dad, so I am referred to and classified as a lone family caregiver. Many family caregivers have other family members where turns can be taken in caring for a loved one. Such a family rotation of the duties and responsibilities of caring for their loved one gives each family caregiver an interval respite break. However, for those of us that have no other family members to trade off with in the duties and responsibilities of caregiving we do not get those respite breaks. There are local community support groups and some community programs that we, lone family caregivers, have to depend on when available for our own well being and short respite breaks. However in the present economic crisis, many of those local community support groups and community programs have closed down due to lack of funds.

The number of Family Caregivers in the U.S., where I live and am one of those family caregivers, continues to rise every year.

1. "According to estimates from the National Alliance for Caregiving, during the past year, 65.7 million Americans (or 29 % of the adult U.S. adult population involving 31 percent of all U.S. households) served as family caregivers for an ill or disabled relative." and

2. "Estimates suggest that the number of caregivers will only continue to rise. Two-thirds of the U.S. public expects to be caregivers in the future, and 43 percent report that it is very likely that they will become a family caregiver at a future time (Opinion Research Corporation, 2005)."

Message To Family Caregivers

"Those who bring sunshine to the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves." ~James Barrie

These codes are to help family caregivers thrive while caregiving -- not just survive it. Family caregiver, please try to incorporate these codes into your daily living. Take care and God bless you.

"Caregiver Codes"

Take Care of Myself

Seek Support

Accept Help

Get Answers

Be Satisfied With Doing My Best

Enjoy Time Away From My Loved One, Without Guilt

Maintain Relationships With Friends, Family, Church Family, Co-Workers, and Community

Set Goals, Pursue Dreams and Remember To Live Not Just Survive

Author Unknown

Recommendations For Family Caregivers

Message To Family and Friends of Family Caregivers:

[Note: Caring for a loved one is isolating often times because of the demands of caregiving responsibilities and duties.]

"We Are Not A Machine"

We are the caregivers, but wait, there is more.
So please hear us out, before closing the door.
No we are not perfect, but we are doing our best.
We just want to get some things off our chests.
When was the last time you tried to come by,
Or the last time you called, if only to say hi?
Do you really realize just what we do here?
And just how often we are driven to tears?
Our loved ones and we are in world's far apart,
And their verbal abuse can tear at the heart.
Their physical care can at times be a pain.
And the emotional struggle can be quite a drain.
What is it exactly we are trying to say?
What would it take to really brighten our day?
A card in the mail, "I'm thinking of you."
Or a phone call to ask, "Hey! what can I do?"
Even better, a visit from family and friends,
To laugh, to talk, and to smile once again.
We must be honest, we don't want to demean.
But please understand, we are not a machine.

By Jerry Ham (c1999)

[Jerry Ham is a Licensed Practical Nurse who left his job to care 24/7 for six years for his mother who had Alzheimer's disease. His inspiration to write this poem came from his family caregiving experience.]

Recommendations For Family Caregivers

The Alzheimer's Prayer

The Most Important Links For Every Caregiver's Resource List

Below are some very useful links for any caregiver's resource arsenal. I have included short paragraphs about each of the resources for your convenience.

The absolute best resource is:

Great Caregiver Resources

Bright Light Ministries: "For Heroes and Heroines: Caregivers

In my eyes, you automatically win the title of hero. As a caregiver, you are doing the work of the Lord. When Jesus sees you doing unpleasant tasks for your loved one, He deems it precious. You are fulfilling what the Lord said about true, deep love. You are important.

Though you may not get public recognition, the Lord recognizes you and what you do. In His eyes, you are doing work that is more important than a celebrity's job. You are doing the work of the Lord.

Jesus touched people and dirtied His hands to help them. He blended spittle and smeared it on the eyes of the blind. He got dirty to make others clean. How He loves you!

He fills me with His love and, with that love, I love you. Thank you for the job you are doing. You are precious to Jesus and to me.

With Jesus' love,
Stacie Ruth"

"The Weary Caregiver's Prayer
by Stacie Ruth

Jesus, be my caregiver as I give care.
Clothe me with strength; my soul is so bare.
Give me love as I love my loved one.
Grant me grace. I no longer can run.

Pick me up and carry me as I lift.
I'm weary. Please give me the gift
To keep going while knowing You're there.
Be my caregiver, Jesus, as I give care."
Caring Bridge: "This non-profit organization provides a personalized free and private website where you can keep loved ones informed during difficult times. In return, family and friends give patient and caregiver support through guestbook messages.

Each website includes a patient care journal where the caregiver and/or patient can chronicle what is happening and how they are feeling a guestbook where family and friends can leave messages of support and encouragement a photo gallery where the caregiver can post photos for friends and family to see and, another feature is the capability to have the online website made into a CaringBook, for a fee.

Access to a CaringBridge website is determined by the family. It requires that visitors know the exact name of the site and the family has the ability to add password protection, create a "by invitation only list" to allow access to pre-approved visitors, or block access to specific unwanted visitors. CaringBridge authors have complete control of the privacy settings and can modify them as frequently as desired." ` Caring Bridge
Caregiver Media Group: Caregiver Media Group is a leading provider of information, support and guidance for family and professional caregivers. Founded in 1995, we produce Today's Caregiver magazine, the first national magazine dedicated to caregivers, the "Fearless Caregiver Conferences", and our web site, caregiver.com which includes topic specific newsletters, online discussion lists, back issue articles of Today's Caregiver magazine, chat rooms and an online store. Caregiver Media Group and all of it's products are developed for caregivers, about caregivers and by caregivers.
National Family Caregivers Association: The National Family Caregivers Association educates, supports, empowers and speaks up for the more than 65 million Americans who care for loved ones with a chronic illness or disability or the frailties of old age. NFCA reaches across the boundaries of diagnoses, relationships and life stages to help transform family caregivers' lives by removing barriers to health and well being.

NFCA in the News

NFCA's core Caring Every Day messages are:

Believe in Yourself.
Protect Your Health.
Reach Out for Help.
Speak Up for Your Rights.
Family Caregiver & FamilyCaregiver E-Magazine: "The Family Caregiver website and free Family Caregiver E-magazine are designed to be informative, educational, and most of all, supportive of your efforts as family caregiver....The website and the E-magazine will support and complement each other, so be sure to take advantage of both.

Don't forget to subscribe to the E-magazine and order your FREE book, The Caregiver Companion." Rebecca Martinez, Editor-in-Chief
Caring Connections: Caring Connections, a program of the National Hospice and Palliative Care Organization (NHPCO), is a national consumer and community engagement initiative to improve care at the end of life.
Caring Connections

Provides free resources and information to help people make decisions about end-of-life care and services before a crisis.
Brings together community, state and national partners working to improve end-of-life care through a national campaign called It's About How You LIVE.

History of Caring Connections
Free Resources

State-specific advance directives
Easy to read publications on these and other topics:
Talking about end-of-life wishes
Supporting someone who is grieving
Caring for your loved ones
Talking to your doctor about pain or illness
Understanding hospice and palliative care services
Paying for long-term care
Caring for a seriously ill child
[PDF} Self-Care For The Family Caregiver: 72 Tips To Help You Thrive And Survive: "We are all, at some time in our lives, either taken care of or giving care to others. I have written this mini-guide to help our beloved family caregivers to take care of themselves as well as they care for others. It is no small task but perhaps the words that follow will help some to make the shift." Author Corrie Woods
AGIS Caregiver Kit: "A caregiver is anyone who helps an aging, ill, or disabled family member or friend manage their day-to-day lives. It's a demanding job that can combine routine tasks with life-changing decisions. Your caregiving
responsibilities might include checking in on a loved one each day, driving to medical appointments, helping with meals, or settling legal and financial problems. The only thing you can know for sure about your role is that it'll change as your loved one's needs change.

Whether you expect to be a caregiver or not-and even if you've been doing it for years-it can feel overwhelming. As you scramble to make sure your loved one's needs are met, your own well-being can easily get lost in the shuffle. That's where the AGIS Caregiver Kit comes in. It provides simple, proven tips and tools that makes it easier to get started, for everyone involved. Especially you." AGIS [Assist Guide Information Services]
Alzheimer's Association: They gave me a great book to read, entitled, the 36 hour day: a family guide to caring for people with Alzheimer's disease, other dementias, and memory loss in later life.

Also, every state chapter has support groups that meet once a month. Family caregivers caring for a loved one with Alzheimer's meet and discuss challenges and solutions for each stage of Alzheimer's through sharing their own experiences of caring for their loved one with Alzheimer's disease.

Amazon

Caring For An Elderly Parent

Caregiving: Ann & Chris's Story

SomeOne Cares: Inspirational Video Featuring Scott Krippayne

A new audiovisual experience featuring award-winning singer songwriter Scott Krippayne singing Someone Who Cares set to a backdrop of dramatic images and inspiring quotes. This flash movie, made in conjunction with SomeOne Cares Christian Caregiver Conference sponsored by LifeWay, gives viewers a chance to remember that no matter the situation, we must remember we are called to be someone who cares because, SomeOne cares.

[Caregivers] Everyday We Make A Difference

TFG: Saluting Family Caregivers

TheFabulousGiver.com (11/30/09) - More than 50 million Americans provide some type of caregiving service for a disabled, ill, or elderly family member. And, I want to say, "Thank You."

Nominate A Caregiver For A Shire Brave Award!

Know A Selfless Compassionate Dedicated Family Caregiver? Nominate That Brave Hero For A Shire Brave Award!

2012 Nominations Have To Be In By June 17, 2012.

Which caregivers qualify for a BRAVE Award?

Any non-healthcare professional who provides a specific and dedicated level of care to an individual(s) and who is not compensated in any direct way because of his or her role as a caregiver is eligible for a Shire BRAVE Award.
They could be a friend, sibling, neighbor, parent, child or other family member. Doctors, nurses, hospital staff and other healthcare workers are not eligible whether they receive compensation for their caregiving or not. Employees of Shire or Shire subsidiaries and their immediate family members are not eligible to nominate or be nominated for a BRAVE Award.
Nominees must also be active caregivers, at least 18 years of age and residents or citizens of Australia, Belgium, Canada, France, Germany, Italy, Spain, Switzerland, the United Kingdom, the United States or any other country in which the awards may become active and available.

Nominate a caregiver for a 2012 Shire BRAVE Award!

Nominating a caregiver you admire is easy. Simply fill out your information and theirs below. When writing about why they should be considered for a BRAVE Award, we recommend you write between 200 and 500 words. (Take your time. If you want, it may be easier to write your submission in a word processing program. When finished, cut and paste your final submission in the space provided below.)
Some questions you might think about when writing include: How big an impact is the caregiver having on the person they're caring for? How big a time and/or financial commitment is he or she giving? What kind of life would the person they're caring for have if they weren't caring for them? What kind of help or support is the caregiver receiving?

These questions are just meant to be thought starters. The key is to write from your heart. For more guidance, click here to read about the BRAVE Caregiver Rating Scale, and be sure to read the stories from last year's BRAVE Recipients.
NOTE: Please do NOT disclose any specific information about medications, medical conditions or prescription drugs used or taken as part of the care recipient's treatment. If necessary, Shire will obtain this information at an appropriate later date.

Nominate a Caregiver for a 2012 Shire Brave Award!: * * * * *

The Shire Brave Awards are a new initiative of Shire plc, a global specialty biopharmaceutical company, to acknowledge ordinary people who give of themselves by caring for others in a meaningful, dedicated and selfless manner. Each recipient of a Brave Award also receives $10,000 USD.

Nominate a Caregiver for a 2012 Shire Brave Award!
Shire Brave Awards: Complete the nomination form [http://www.shirebraveawards.com/braveawards/en/abouttheaward ] to share with Shire a caregiver you think is worthy of being recognized with a 2012 Brave Award! Shire will select up to ten recipients for a 2012 Brave Award. Nominations are open until June 17, 2012.

Important Note:

A caregiver as defined by the Shire Brave Awards is a non-healthcare professional. Doctors, nurses, hospital staff and other healthcare workers who receive compensation as part of their employment for caring for others are not eligible to be considered for a Shire Brave Award.
Who Qualifies? Any lay person who provides care to others.

This may be a friend, sibling, neighbor, parent, child, or other family member that provides a specific and dedicated level of care to an individual(s) and who is not compensated in any direct way because of their role as a caregiver. The Brave Awards are open to eligible Nominees who are residents or citizens of France, Germany, Italy, Spain, Canada, the United Kingdom, and the United States.

Our judges will rate submissions based on the Shire Caregiver Rating Scale, which was developed in the spirit of the Company's Brave values. Each value is rated on a scale of 1-10, with a maximum Cumulative Caregiver Score of 50.

Shire Caregiver Rating Scale:

Build on Integrity: RESPECT
Risk a "Risk": COURAGE
Act on the Needs of Others: DEDICATION
Vie to Be Better Than Yesterday: IMPACT
Exemplify Trust & Openness: PATIENCE

Guidepost Article On How You Can Help A Caregiver You Know

Ways to Help a Caregiver During a Difficult Time - Guideposts: With all her worries, I was afraid my sister would burn out being a caregiver. All I needed was a little positive thinking to come up with these ideas to help her.

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Facebook AmberAlert2010 Senior Citizens Missing: Facebook AmberAlert2010 Senior Citizens Missing - (65 yrs. old and up)
Facebook AmberAlert2010 Found: Facebook AmberAlert2010 Found - (all ages reported via all official alert channels)

I pray that you have been blessed and encouraged reading my lens. Don't forget to leave a comment, tweet it, give it a thumbs up, share on Facebook, and/or share it with your family and friends. Thank you.

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Greengo Aug 1, 2011 @ 3:40 pm | delete

Excellent Lens Ann. I know this will be helpful to a lot of people.

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nyactor Aug 2, 2011 @ 8:12 pm | delete

Thank you for providing inspiration to make who care for others as well as informing others about the truth!

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by HomeExec

University of Phoenix - Northern Nevada Campus (Reno, NV)
MBA [Master's of Business Administration]
Graduated 2008 with Honors (Suma Cum Laude)

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Family Caregiver: Tips-Encouragement-Useful Links

Message To Family Caregivers

Recommendations For Family Caregivers

Message To Family and Friends of Family Caregivers:

Recommendations For Family Caregivers

The Alzheimer's Prayer

The Most Important Links For Every Caregiver's Resource List

Great Caregiver Resources

Amazon

Caring For An Elderly Parent

Caregiving: Ann & Chris's Story

SomeOne Cares: Inspirational Video Featuring Scott Krippayne

[Caregivers] Everyday We Make A Difference

TFG: Saluting Family Caregivers

Nominate A Caregiver For A Shire Brave Award!

Know A Selfless Compassionate Dedicated Family Caregiver? Nominate That Brave Hero For A Shire Brave Award!

2012 Nominations Have To Be In By June 17, 2012.

Guidepost Article On How You Can Help A Caregiver You Know

My Other Squidoo Lenses

Other Links Where You Can Find Me/Follow Me/ Send Me A Friend Request

Amber Alert 2010

Amber Alert 2010 Links

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