Family Guy Quotes

Famous Family Guy Quotes

The Best Family Guy Quotes

• Lois, when I'm through with them, our kids will be so smart, they'll be able to program their own VCRs without spilling piping hot gravy all over myself.
• Oh, jeez, I spilled wine all over your shirt! You know what's good for getting stains out? Sex with another man
• Come, ice cream. Come to my mouth. How dare you disobey me!
• I only drank so that the Statue of Liberty would take her clothes off.
• This is life. So go and have a ball. Because the world don't move to the beat of just one drum. What might be right for you may not be right for some. You take the good, you take the bad, you take them both and there you have...my opening statement. Sit, Ubu, sit. Good dog.
• Forecast for tomorrow; a few sprinkles of genius with a chance of doom!
• Meg Griffin: You could kill all the girls who are prettier than me.
  Death: Well that would just leave England.
• Tom, you're so deep in the closet you're finding Christmas presents.
• Excuse me, is your refrigerator running? Because if it is, it probably runs like you, very homosexually.
• Brian Griffin: Face it Peter, you get competitive about everything.
  Peter Griffin: I am so not competitive. In fact, I am the least non-competitive. So I win.