Can I Fix My marriage?

Who Wants to Know How to Get Your Wife Back?
By Steve Wojnar

Have you ever wanted to know how to really get you wife back, even after you have messed up big time? Do doubts and the feelings of being lost without a clue hit you in your time of need? Then you need to take heed of what I am about to tell you.

I will try to spread some help to you with a few tips that have worked wonders for others.

I know you are sitting there reading this and feeling helpless and dumb, not knowing what to do. You have to get out of this clueless hole you are in. Are you gonna stay there? Or do something about it. If you are serious, then you better get busy. And I here to try and give you some direction.

First thing you need to do is change your way of thinking, it got you here in the first place. You have to stop feeling that you are a MAN, and I can't do that, I can't beg. If she's mad at you, then you deserve it, and you need to be something different in her eyes to make this work. You have to come to the realization that you did mess up, and following the same old path will not be productive to your cause. No excuses, agree with it, and don't be trying to defend whatever it is that you did. No lies, no cover up to your deed, just total honesty. Losing your wife is a big deal, and everything you do now is a big deal, and everything you did then is a big deal.

Second thing you need to do is not approach her with the same old story that you won't let it happen again. It won't work this time. You have got to make her believe you mean it, and words are not gonna do it. Whatever it is that you may have done, you need to stop doing that now, or at least be on your way to repairing that behaviour.

Get some help if you need it, counseling, whatever. Do this before you start to talk to your wife about how you are gonna change. Let her, and mostly yourself, see and know you are doing something about it. This will help prove to yourself and to her that you are indeed serious about making changes.

I know, I know, it is hard work, and that's because it is. You are probably feeling that you are fine the way you are, but remember, the way you are got you to this point in your marriage. Obviously the way you were was not good enough, or else we would not be having this discussion.

If you can let your manly pride and stubbornness step aside, and realize what I have told you is the truth, then you can be on the road to get your wife back. There is a lot more to tell you, but I can't list all the tips here.

DO you really want to get your wife back? If you really want to get your wife back, and are truly serious about it, then I recommend you you check out my other tips and resources on my website. You will be glad you did.

If you found this tip helpful, and would like to learn more tips like this, and many more, then please feel free to stop on by. Thousands of others have used our help to get their relationships back in order again: Direct To This Site

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Steve_Wojnar http://EzineArticles.com/?Who-Wants-to-Know-How-to-Get-Your-Wife-Back?&id=2207398

Article Source: How To Get Your Ex Back

Re-ignite the spark that drew you together. I'll show you more than 101 ways to find creative romance, make for great date nights, reevaluate your relationship on fresh ground, and much, much more.

Get The Right Advice For You Here!

ACT QUICKLY TO FIX YOUR MARRIAGE

- Statistic show that the longer you wait, the harder it will be to get your lover back. Remember that your ex lover has an emotional connection to your relationship too. But as time passes, they will feel less emotional attachment to the relationship with you.

In the middle of a session the other day I had a powerful realization. I was asked to think of a relationship I had with something in the last week that in my mind was the ideal relationship, and to think of what it was about that relationship that made it ideal.

A number of men in the group thought of their cars, tool sheds, families, workmates, old friends, even relationships with objects such as their television remote, recliner chair, or favorite pair of shoes. To each of these men, these things felt comfortable, and simple. The relationships they had with these people or objects was rewarding and easy to maintain.

When my turn came to identify my ideal relationship, I thought of my dog. My dog has very simple needs, and it is the ultimate ego-boost for me when I get home at night and I am greeted in such an enthusiastic fashion. I don't know of any others that greet me so enthusiastically night after night. No matter how long I have been away from the house or no matter how my day has been. I call this unconditional love.

GO HERE FOR MORE ON WHAT IS UNCONDITIONAL LOVE

Unconditional love is the type of love that comes without conditions. It is the type of love that you have for your partner when the romantic, hollywood-style love is gone. Once the romantic love is gone you make the transition to "real" love. Real love is love you have for your partner despite the knowledge that they are not perfect. You know your partner has faults. You know your partner is not perfect. You know your partner makes mistakes sometimes, but that's okay. You still love them. This is unconditional love.

The same thing applies to you however in looking at your partner's faults. You acknowledge that you are the same. You have faults. You are not perfect. You know you make mistakes sometimes, but that's okay. That's called self-acceptance, and you expect unconditional love to overcome the faults and imperfections that people have.

So what do you get from this then? Should we all go out and get dogs to teach us something about unconditional love? Maybe there is a lesson to be learnt here. We all clutter our lives with trials and tribulations, and there is the temptation to let our issues rule our lives.

But if you are serious about saving your marriage you need to put the clutter to one side and let your unconditional love come through. It is okay to have faults and make mistakes. And love will conquer them all.

Have a think about unconditional love and how you can apply this realization to your relationship. Use it to fix your marriage or relationship.

BECAUSE YOU BOTH DESERVE BETTER

Having a marriage without problems is a virtual impossibility, but this doesn't mean it has to have problems every time. You can fix your marriage.
If you do have problems, find out what causes it.

It may be possible that you have made some of these mistakes.

LEARN HERE TO FIX YOUR MARRIAGE

* A Lack Of Respect
Although we are who we are, don't ever tell your partner or friends anything bad, we each must be respected.

* Not Listening
Pretending that you don't hear when they speak. Or you ignore them by watching TV or playing on your Computer. Or you listen, but you constantly interrupt them or make your own decision without considering their input at all.

* Dull Sex Life

When they want to have sex, you reject them a lot. making up excuses. You know it will threaten your marriage.

* Not Always Feeling Right
You always see everything before it goes wrong, and you know what to do. Always blaming fault on them, rather than trying to work it out together.

* Making false Promises
You have promised things but keeping making the same mistakes again and again. Do what you say. Don't give false promise.

* Not Being Sensitive
Saying things that touch her heart, in the wrong way. You must stop that. Respect her. Don't belittle her.

* Being Dishonest
Don't lie to your lover. Once, you lie, you will keep making bigger ones. Be careful, it will destroy the trust.

* Having Bad Habits
You have a bad habit, but you keep doing it.

* Having A Big Ego
Thinking of yourself first, and putting their needs second.

* Being Temperamental
The partner doesn't finish to explain you interrupt angrily and blame you so much. Make a habit to relax and discuss everything in quiet and peace talk.

It happens to the best of us. Communication is such a fickle thing, and the lines of communication can become blurred every so often, especially when feelings are involved. Even those who think that they are immune to the confusion of conflict can find themselves drawn into a communication breakdown when they least expect it, and chaos ensues.

This happened to me on the weekend, and until to be quite honest, it took me by surprise. Even those of us who are better equipped than many others are not immune. My partner told me something that really hurt my feelings, and I lashed back in defense. It was a silly argument, over something as simple as a misplaced bottle of aftershave. But to me, it represented something much deeper, that had been simmering away for a couple of weeks. I get frustrated at having to search for something when it is not where I expect it to be. Worse still when my partner has shifted it and I don't know the first place to begin searching.

Aftershave, needles and thread, car keys, a Tupperware container to store my baking soda in, covers for our outdoor chairs, all were examples of instances where I had to turn the house upside-down. A simple answer from my partner when these things were shifted would have saved me a lot of time and frustration. And the answer I got? "You need to open your eyes and organize yourself better"

I was gutted. When I come home from work I exercise the dog and cook dinner so that it is on the table by the time my partner gets home. The house is always spotless and warm, as I'm very conscious of coming home to a tidy environment. I see this as a fundamental part of my role in coming home first, and it takes a lot of my time. To imply that I have the time to "organize yourself better" really hurt.

I don't expect praise, but I did hope that my efforts were recognized. I got told that "I don't expect you to cook my dinner every night" was interpreted by me as ingratitude, and hurt me even more.

So where to from here? My partner felt guilty at coming home every night to the perfect household, whereas I felt guilty if it wasn't perfect. It was never about me trying to make him feel guilty, but it seems it did. And this is where the communication fell down. He misinterpreted my efforts, and I misinterpreted his response.

Communication, communication, communication. I need for my partner to keep me informed of where things move to. I need to be informed. I need to voice my frustration before it gets to boiling point. We both need to talk about our feelings more, and how each of our contributions to our home and our relationship make us feel, and how we interpret each others contributions. It is not a competition, but for many couples it feels like it.

When people feel guilt or stress, it leads them to act funny ways. Often stress and guilt are barriers to communication. The key to overcoming them is to recognize what it is, and have the courage to talk about it. You might be able to do it as a couple, or you might want the help of a friend who can listen to the way you are communicating with each other and offer insights and advice.

We got it sorted out, and kissed and hugged. It wouldn't hurt so much if I didn't feel such love at the same time. But it served as a good reminder to me. Sometimes you get so wrapped up in your own emotions that you forget to think of the other person. You also need to entertain the possibility that you are misinterpreting each other. Talking about it is the way to expose the miss-communication and let the healing begin.

A good lesson to learn, even for the experts.

You can't afford to give your marriage 50%. You need 100% - you need the BEST information now! You have to learn what it takes to save your marriage. Get the whole package that gives you REAL results ... guaranteed.

YOU HAVE TO GO HERE!

If you truly want to get back together with your ex, you have to do a bit of soul searching. You must be totally honest with yourself. You have to decide if you and your ex get back together it will truly make you happy, and you won't wind up down the same road that caused the breakup in the first place. It's always easy after a breakup to only think of the good times. It's important that you try to be completely objective and think of both the good and bad times.

In reality, there are a few relationships that are unworthy of saving. If you and your ex spent more time fighting than you did doing something good and fun, then perhaps you should consider moving on. f they were physically or verbally abusive, it probably wasn't a healthy relationship. If they were mentally unstable, you probably are better off without them. If the relationship overall was a good one, and they weren't abusive, and they were of sound mind, the following should help you and your ex get back together.

Pestering and pushing your ex isn't a good idea. If you try to constantly get in touch with your ex; whether its by phone, email, text message, or stalking them you're going to do more harm than good. They will see this as a sign of desperation. This could actually push them further away than bring them closer to you.

FIX YOUR MARRIAGE

Don't argue, beg, or plead with your ex about your past relationship. It's easy when you and your mind are all alone. Your mind manifests all sorts of "wrongs" that you may have done. Even when your ex broke up with you they may have gave you reasons why. Now, you're probably beating yourself up over them. You probably wish you had never done those things. The past is the past. This is the present.

If you get it in your mind that the relationship is currently over. You can't go back in time, though you probably wish you could. Concentrate on what is going on now. The only thing worse than obsessively contacting your ex is to beg or plead with them. Make promises how you'll change, etc...This won't help you and your ex get back together at all.

If you back off, give them some time, and live your life, you'll be doing yourself a big favor in more ways than one. You'll probably become more desirable to your ex, because you're allowing them to think about you and miss you. You'll also be helping yourself to live a happier, more fulfilling life too.

Marriage and dating is different than 30, 20, even 10 years ago. Today, more than half of all marriages fail for many different reasons. This makes the thought of commitment seem very scary. When we are faced with challenges, most people just quit trying. Dating is like a marathon of dating as many people as possible, without really getting to know them on a much deeper level.

Any relationship, no matter what stage it is in, is hard. Everything doesn't go just the way we want it, fights do happen, and both sides need to be working together for it to work out. Most times when a relationship ends, it is because one side feels that something was missing. That "spark" has left, leaving either or both parties feeling inadequate or unfulfilled.

Even at this rate of the odds not being very good, a healthy long-lasting relationship is possible and proven by many, many people. Do they have some unknown secret? The answer is they work hard at their relationship. They have chosen to love their mate. By making this love choice, you are making a decision that even when times get rough, you will stick it out.

Try to think of this like buying a car. you choose your make, model, year, color, and all its features that fits all your desires. You drive the car for a couple of months, you realize that maybe you should have got a larger model, or leather seats, or maybe a sunroof would have been nice, or even just a convertible for those nice summer drives. But now it is too late, so you choose to keep it, and make what you have work out. A marriage is the same way. Everything is not always perfect, and there are hurdles to overcome, but you have made your decision and you chose to make it work out.

There are many things you can do to keep marriage relationship going good.

I am going to list two things periodically to help you strengthen and keep your relationship heading in the right direction. Keep looking for more things as time goes on. You can subscribe to this RSS feed, to keep updated whenever new additions are made.

STARTING OVER!

When you first get together with your loved one, it is exciting and new. All the little annoying things are overlooked. But after time, the nagging starts. Instead of hearing, "You look great," they hear, "Why are you wearing those clothes?" If this sounds like your relationship, you need to both sit down and talk honestly about the changes that are happening. talk about what made it great in the beginning, and why you were attracted to each other. Then together, make a commitment to start over. You will both have to work at this, it will not be easy. Forgive each other, forget the past, and start over. Begin flirting again. Concentrate on the special things your partner does, and put aside the unimportant things. It will take some time, but be patient.

SET ASIDE TIME FOR EACH OTHER

Spending quality time is very important. You can spend time with friends, going out to dinner, go to some outside activity together, or just spend time cuddling watching a movie. What you do is not important, but do something you both enjoy, and do it together. I know that we all have busy lives, and finding time can be very difficult, but just schedule the time together like you would any appointment. Once you make this appointment, keep it, no canceling unless it is a life or death emergency.

Come Back For More Next Time

How get your ex back? This is the lament of every guy who has ever been dumped. Did you know that in three quarters of break ups, it is the girl who calls the whole thing off? Guys generally want to stay together with their girlfriends. This article is about how to get ex back.

First of all, you have to determine whether she did you a favor by dumping you. Too often, guys stick with girls out of inertia. It is easier to stay in an okay relationship than go out and look for a really good one. If you don't feel that the girl who dumped you was your soul mate, consider that her calling things off might be a blessing in disguise.

If this is not the case and you still want get your ex back, read on.

The next step is to determine whether she loves you. Girls can be fickle. They are much more likely to act impulsively and then have regrets about what they did. If you think she still loves you, you have a good chance at ho get your ex back.

In this case, you have to make her come to you. Many guys call their ex's numerous times, send hundreds of texts, and exhibit other such stalkerish behavior. This just pushes their girlfriends away.

Instead, seem like you are accepting of the break up. Move on. Date other girls - especially girls in her circle. By making her come back to you instead of the other way around, you will go about how get your ex back.

During this time, you should analyze whether you have changed from the many she first fell in love with. Often, guys try to impress girls up front. But, once they have slipped into a comfortable relationship with their girlfriend, they slag off. For instance, are you still working out as often as you did? Toward the end, were you still opening her car door, buying her flowers, and generally romancing her the way you did at the beginning of the relationship? These things can make a big difference in how get your ex back.

When you do see your ex girlfriend, subtly remind her of your common bonds. If you are going to go to a party where you know she's going to be, wear a shirt she gave you. If she has a favorite cologne, wear it. And, when you talk, bring up the positive things in your past. Don't beat her over the head with them, but make her nostalgic about your common history.

Invite her to non-committal type of events. If a group of friends are going to the beach, ask her to come along. Begin seeing her in social settings once again. When she comes along, pay some attention to her, but spend your time with your friends and other girls too. When she sees that you are an attractive catch, you've already won half the battle of how get your ex back.

So, that is how get your ex back.