Free Best Man Speech Wedding

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Ladies & Gentlemen. My name is Brent, and on behalf of John and Jane, I would like to thank you for attending this blessed event today! I promise to keep my words brief, as I know we're all here to witness the spectacle that is John dancing.

Jane and John have each walked many miles to be here together today, and this wedding is a joy to behold. I can speak for everyone in this room, when I say to you both that we wish you all the happiness that you deserve. We are so glad that you have found one another, and this day will serve as a reminder that the best years for you both are yet to come. It's been said that if marriage is to be a success, one should begin by marrying the right person. It's obvious that each of you is indeed marrying the right person today. I don't think I've ever seen a couple who complement each other as much as these two do. John is an intelligent, soft-spoken, organized and witty man. He is very well respected in his field of ____________________ [Grooms Occupation], and he's just a generally all round nice guy too! Jane is a dear ___________________ [Your relationship to the bride] who has been on a spiritual journey to better herself and I would say she has had a remarkable quest. I enjoy watching Jane and John challenge each other to continuously be better.

They are very supportive of each other, and while they are fiercely competitive people, they are never competitors. They are two people with a wonderful amount of synergy and they are both a joy to know. They say that there is no surprise as magical as finding your life's mate. You two must feel the magic, because it seems as if your happiness emanates from you on this very magical day! I really feel that I would be remiss if I did not just give you some advice.

So I asked a few of your family and friends what advice you can give Jane & John to ensure a long happy marriage. I had some great responses for you both. Primarily, though, John, they thought it best to direct the advice at you. Never go to bed angry.........always stay up and fight. Always remember the three words to end all arguments........"You're right dear". Keep the lid down, and The best way to remember her birthday or your anniversary is to forget it once. Let's raise our glasses as we toast this couple:

May you both live as long as you want, And never want as long as you live.

1. Some of the people in the room will not even know who you are yet. So introduce yourself, this doesn't have to be long. Simply saying "I'm So and So, The groom's best man and best friend.
2. This is a time when brevity is the best, so limit your best man speech for a maximum of three minutes.
3. Plan what to say in advance. Unless you give speeches all the time, not at the top of his head.
4. Don't talk the grooms past relationships. Even if you do have a terrific story.
5. How would you describe each of them? What are the first five adjectives that come to mind?
6. What was the groom like before he met the bride? How has he changed knowing her? How did they meet?
7. If you are married, you may wish to think about marriage advice you've received or have learned.
8. Raise your glass and lets have a toast - Lift our glass and lets celebrate this fantastic day!

Hi my name is Brent and John has asked me to be his best man for this wonderfu loccasion. I would like to say it is a very special honour but with it, comes the responsibility of giving the bloody speech. I would not say it is very comfortable to wear a tuxedo in a 100-degree church, which is not air-conditioned. The church ceremony I'm sure you'll all agree was a wonderful, wonderful occasion. Maybe a little hot, but I'm glad to see so many of you have replaced your electrolytes with fuel of the alcoholic kind since the reception began.

I have known John & Jane for_________ [how many years] years. You might say John and I met by accident, but it is no accident that John met Jane.
If you know John you know he is an excellent athlete, in fact I noticed his Athletes foot right away. This was a man who had his knees and ankles shaved, for easy taping I knew this was a hard-core sports fanatic. We both share a tremendous love of Football and basketball. For many years we have had a running bet during the season as to who will score more goals or more runs which of course, I always won.
John is a ______________ [Grooms Occupation] in Sydney, and I thought_________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________[Funny or quirky aspect about grooms occupation]
John is a man who has dedicated his life to __________________[Grooms occupation] And now I'm sure will use his experience with ___________________________[what the Groom does in his occupation] in his marriage with Jane.

It is great that John found Jane He has always been looking for someone, young, dynamic, intelligent, attractive, and with good health insurance. John and Jane met_________________________ [where they meet], But I have it on good authority that John started looking for a wife on the internet. And with a multitude of resources at his fingertips, he found some really great stuff, but sadly was unable to find himself a suitable partner. That is, until I mentioned to him that the correct category to be looking should be Woman Seeking Man. I explained the way it works, send an old picture when you still had lots of hair, lie about your height and weight, and at all other times be sincere and honest. I imagine that when John & Jane met and introduced each other he said I'm John and she said "I need a Diamond" So John said, sure let's pick one out. Jane is a Diamond. Mike is a gem; I think together they make beautiful jewellery.

No Marriage would be complete without some brotherly advice to help set you on your way... So I canvassed the room and got some really good stuff for you!
1. Love honour and cherish each other, and don't forget to take out the garbage 2. Your wife is always right 3. Just in case she is not right, refer back to #2 4. Always, yes always, notice every new hairstyle or dress 5. Do something nice for each other every single day. If she asks if something makes her 6. look fat the answer is categorically NO 7. Flowers are always a good Idea, even if you are not in trouble 8. There is really nothing better than a good foot rub or massage 9. Your wife is more important than sports. I guess. Even the cup final

It is a great joy for me to see John and Jane so happy. You learn things when you get older. Hmmm I mean more mature. You make betterdecisions, isn't it great that two people would entwine and commit to each other for life. Love; isn't that what it is all about? We are here to celebrate that glorious event and this ceremony is all about letting the world know how much John and Jane's love for each other is a reflection of one's own soul in another's. Anyway it is time to celebrate the Joyous and unbridled love that these two spectacular people will share the rest of their lives, would you please stand now and join me in a toast.

To love and laughter and happily ever after.

Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, I hope everyone is enjoying this very special day so far. It's been an emotional day, .......even the cake is in tiers. I would like to start by thanking John for his kind words on behalf of our lovely bridesmaids [Bridesmaids Names here]. I'm sure you will agree they have carried out their role superbly, I would also like to thank the ushers...... for at turning up sober.

I think you will all agree Jane looks one in a million today. And John you look smashing also. Even though it's plainly obvious that you've copied my outfit. For those of you who don't know me, my name is Brent. And I have the honour of being best man. And it is a great honour, but in all honesty I am actually a little nervous doing this, but I feel a bit comforted by the fact I have actually rehearsed this speech in front of a live audience at the local old people's home, ...... I think it went well, they all pissed themselves anyway.

I'd also like to congratulate John on a truly magnificent speech, I always knew it would be hard to follow, and I was right, I could hardly follow a word of it. During the service today I couldn't help thinking its funny how history repeats itself, I meanit was [Brides age here] years ago __________________________[Brides parents names here] were sending their daughter to bed with a dummy.......and it's happening all over again today. I have known John for ___________________[how long known Groom] years, he has always loved sport especially football, from an early age it was obvious he was a natural defender, he loved to get stuck in. It's a shame he hasn't carried that over to his working life, John work mates have started calling him god at work because they never see him, .........and if he ever does any work it's a miracle.

Now John has always taken great pride in his appearance, some people have even said he is vain, I never believed this, until the morning we got to the airport to fly off for his stag weekend, he seemed to have a glow about him, all the boys were asking him if he had been using tanning lotion? John denied it profusely. After another pint and a lot of abuse he tried to fob us off with the excuse that he was in such a rush when he got up, that in his haste he had mistakenly put Jane moisturiser on which had tanning in it, sufficed to say he was set upon then until he finally admitted that he bought the stuff himself. I just don't know how he thought he would get away with it, it was snowing for the whole week before.

I thought I had better find out some interesting events that happened on the day he was hatched. He was born on the _____________ [Grooms D.O.B] which was a Sunday, number one in the charts was Elvis with 'way down', now the only other event I found of any importance in this month was the introduction of free family planning. Now I wouldn't say John was an ugly baby, but _________________________[Grooms Mums name] only had morning sickness after he was born. He was a slightly slow starter as well, at playschool he was different from the other 5 year olds, he was 11. I remember one day sitting in pizza hut, when the waiter asked if he would like his pizza cut into 4 or 8 pieces, John reply was . . . . "You better make it because I'll never manage 8." We have always been close, when we were young we would always be playing something driving our respective parents mad, I remember when Ghostbusters the film was at the cinema, we would be upstairs at _____________________ [Grooms parents names here] with all the lights out jumping around like a couple of lunatics pretending to be catching ghosts, our equipment for this was a school backpack and a wire coat hanger each. Well I have a present,........something you can play with later................ One of my last duties before I toast the happy couple is to read a few cardsTo John and Jane, hope you have a wonderful day, sorry we can't be there lots of love___________________ [friends name here] I would like to say best of luck to the two of you , I really am absolutely delighted for both of you. I hope you have a long and happy future together.

It now gives me immense pleasure, not to mention relief to invite you all to stand and raise your glasses to the new Mr & Mrs _____________________[Grooms last Name].. To John and Jane