Freedom From Smoking Cigarettes

This Is The First Month (Aug 13 - Aug 31)

Something tells me it's going to be a long bumpy road

• Day One (Aug 13)
  Didn't go as planned, I woke up feeling anxious with only three cigarettes left...I thought I'd be able to put a patch on after I finished the last of them, but I backed out, I failed...My husband and I went for a drive and had to stop at our corner store to drop off the movie we had rented the night before, of course it was me who went it...This left me wide open to where I purchased a package of cigarettes...As it's midnight and I'm up suffering from major heartburn it only seemed fitting to document the days failure...I hope I find the will power tomorrow...
• Day Two (Aug 14)
  I'm still not a non smoker, so that makes day two a complete waste just like day one was...I just don't understand why I can't give up smoking so easily I have no problems giving up other things...It freaks me out to think of not smoking, it's been a huge part of my life and seems to always be there for me no matter what...I had posted in the forum asking how people would go about writing a lens on quitting this bad habit and to my surprise there was quite a few people who had already quit...Hearing about some of their stories has actually eased my mind in a lot of ways and tonight before I go to bed I am finally going to put on a patch...They say that you don't need to wear one while your sleeping, but I think if I put it on before going to sleep then when I wake up I won't crave that very first cigarette in the morning, making it that much easier (I hope)...See the people who have gone out of their way to help motivate me in my quest to be a non smoker, with their help I may stand a chance... My Support Group
• Day Three (Aug 15)
  Today is counted as day one, I slept with a 15mg patch on last night so I wouldn't crave that first morning cigarette, and it worked...I immediately switched to a 21mg patch for the day and should be able to go through the night with it, but to avoid any future failings I will put on a new 15mg before bed...I've used my electric cigarette so many times today I had to recharge it part way through the day, we all know better electric than the tobacco cigarettes...The patch gave me some wicked dreams last night (guess what my next lens is about), and I'm hoping that doesn't happen tonight I have to get up at 2am to be at work by 3:30am and don't want to be running around in my dreams when I'm suppose to be sleeping...The day went well, I didn't have a cigarette until around 7pm and I was up at 5am so still not totally smoke free but one cigarette through the entire day seems to be a very good thing for me, two packages to one cigarette that's a big yahoo to me!
• Day Four (Aug 16)
  The day has been a long one, starting work at 3:30am and not getting home till almost 3pm...Things were going real good until my electric cigarette decided to quit working, I thought it was the battery but after charging it still nothing...That had me checking craigslist for another brand of the electronic cigarette and luckily I was able to find one that looks like it just might be a better one, in the meantime I broke down and bought a pack of cigarettes, the whole thing was stressing me out...You know what they say tomorrow's another day and when I leave in the morning for work I'll have the new electric so we'll see how that goes...As soon as I have a spare moment I'll snap a picture and show you the new one, if not during the week Saturday for sure...The smoking was up, seems I smoked eight cigarettes today, still better than two packages, but shouldn't of been even one...
• Day Five (Aug 17)
  I have nothing new to report, the new electronic cigarette seems to be working much better than my old one did...It allowed me to hardly smoke today at all, in total I only smoke two tobacco cigarettes today and now that work isn't so crazy I'll be back to using the patch to curb that...I hope to be smoke free completely by the weekend, fingers crossed and will power kicking in this is so achievable...