When I was young, I lived in an isolated kampong deep in the jungle.

Every day, my mother would remind me not to return home too late as there would not be any transportation after a certain time.

One night, before going home, I bought a packet of kueh teow soup for supper. I was late and missed the last bus home. I waited for the taxi but there was none in sight. I was getting worried as it was getting darker and darker. So I tried to flag down private vehicles going in my direction.

No vehicle would stop for me until a motorcyclist took pity on me and stopped to give me a lift. He looked kind and I accepted his offer and got onto his motorbike.

On the way home, we would pass by a temple. At night, the temple would look eerily spooky with the dim light from the candles.

At first, the motorcyclist was warm and friendly.
However, when we near the temple, the motorcyclist's eyes grew bigger and bigger.

His kind face turned red with anger. He was muttering something loud but was not audible to me. I was so scared that I closed my eyes in order not to see his angry face.

Then, the motorcylist stopped in front of the temple and then yelled at me.

"Your kueh teow soup is so hot!! It is burning my thigh! Can you please move it away???"

When I was young, I have two friends who were very close to each other. They were inseparable and played with each other everyday. I will call them Friend A and Friend B.

Friend A loved fried eggs. Whenever he went out for lunch or dinner, he would ask for a fried egg on top of his noodles, fried rice, etc, without fail.

One day, Friend A was involved in an accident and died. Friend B was devastated. Friend B went to the cemetery to pray everyday. He would go to the nearest restaurant and ordered a box of fried rice with an egg on top to be offered to Friend A when he went to pray to him.

The next day, when he opened the box, there was no egg inside! Friend B was petrified. He thought, must be A who came and took the fried egg away.

The same thing happened the next day and the day after that. B was getting worried. So, one day, he asked the cook to prepare the fried rice with a fried egg again. As usual, he went to the cemetery to offer it to his friend. Curious, he opened the box to check for the egg. He was angry to find that there was no fried egg in the box after all.

Feeling cheated, he went back to the restaurant and demanded to see the cook.

"Where is the fried egg?? I told you there must be a fried egg inside!! You have cheated me for a few days now! Gimme back my money!!"

Then, angry with the accusation, the cook opened the box - the fried egg was inside the box!

The cook said, "Stupid! You open the box upside down. No wonder you cannot see the egg!!"

During one summer holiday, my friends and I went into town to work for two months. Being young and away from home for the first time, we drank and smoke with not a care in the world.

One night, we were pissed drunk and caught the last bus home.

Being tired, we fell asleep on the bus. I was woken by the chilly wind after some time. I was shocked to find that there was no one in the bus and I was the last passenger. I looked to the front to check for the driverb but he was no where in sight.

Yet, the bus was moving.

I panicked. I rubbed my eyes to make sure that I was not dreaming. The night was dark and cold. I jumped out from the bus hysterically and tried to run as hard as I could to get away.

Then I heard someone yelled from behind the bus.

"Hey! Don't run away! Come over here and help to push the bus!" yelled the bus driver.

I saw my other friends helping to push the bus, which broke down while I was asleep.

Innovative delivery method, the Chinese way ... forget about DHL, UPS or even FedEx!!!

A family in the Southern Province of China, was puzzled when the coffin of their dead grandmother arrived from the States.

It was sent by one of the daughters. The dead body was so tightly squeezed inside the coffin, with no space left in it!

When they opened the lid, they found a letter on top which read as follows:

"Dear Cousins, I am sending Ah-ma's body to you since it was her wish that she should be buried in the compound of our ancestral home in Tung Shin.

I'm sorry I could not come along as I have used all of my paid leave.

You will find inside the coffin, under Ah-ma's body: 12 cans of Yohmeitsu, 10 packets of Swiss chocolates and packets of Chinatown Lap Cheong. Please divide these among all of you.

On Ah-ma's feet you will find a new pair of Nike Air shoes (size 10) for Ah boy. Also, there are 2 pairs of shoes for Ah Mei's and Ah Lien's sons. I hope the sizes are correct.

Ah-ma is wearing 6 CK T-Shirts. The large size is for Ah Bak and the others are for my nephews. Just distribute them among yourselves. The 2 new Armani Jeans that Ah-ma is wearing are for the boys. The Rolex watch that Lee Ah Bai wanted is on Ahma's left wrist.

Kiasu Aunty Pei Pei, Ah-ma is wearing the Tiffany necklace, earrings and ring that you asked for. Please take them. The 6 white Polo cotton socks that Ah-ma is wearing must be divided among my teenage cousins.

Let me know what else you need as Ah Kong (grandfather) also not feeling well nowadays. I can send all required things when our Ah-Kong goes back too...

I found these little nuggets:

1. Jane is the mother of David. Jane is the _________ of David's mother.

2. A poor man has __________.
A rich man needs __________.
If you eat __________, you will die.
One word fits all three blanks above.

Well, what's your answers? Hmm, how to post the answers without taking away the fun?

Maybe I will post the answers on another lens of mine, totally unrelated.

This is another story that I received through the email. Enjoy!

A long time ago in China, a girl named Li-Li got married and went to live with her husband and mother-in-law.

In a very short time, Li-Li found that she could not get along with her mother-in-law at all. Their personalities were very different, and Li-Li was angered by many of her mother-in-law's habits. In addition, she criticized Li-Li constantly.

Days passed, and weeks passed. Li-Li and her mother-in-law never stopped arguing and fighting.But what made the situation worse was that, according to ancient Chinese tradition, Li-Li had to bow to her mother-in-law and obey her every wish. All the anger and unhappiness in the house was causing Li-Li's poor husband great distress.

Finally, Li-Li could not stand her mother-in-law's bad temper and dictatorship any longer, and she decided to do something about it!

Li-Li went to see her father's good friend, Mr. Huang, who sold herbs. She told him the situation and asked if he would give her some poison so that she could solve the problem once and for all.

Mr.Huang thought for awhile and finally said, "Li-Li, I will help you solve your problem, but you must listen to me and obey what I tell you."

Li-Li said, "Yes, Mr. Huang, I will do whatever you tell me to do."

Mr. Huang went into the back room, and returned in a few minutes with a package of herbs.

He told Li-Li, "You can't use a quick-acting poison to get rid of your mother-in-law, because that would cause people to become suspicious. Therefore, I have given you a number of herbs that will slowly build up poison in her body. Every other day prepare some delicious meal and put a little of these herbs in her serving.

Now, in order to make sure that nobody suspect you. when she dies, you must be very careful to act very friendly towards her. Don't argue with her, obey her every wish, and treat her like a queen."

Li-Li was so happy. She thanked Mr. Huang and hurried home to start her plot of murdering her mother-in-law.

Weeks went by, and months went by, and every other day, Li-Li would serve the specially treated food to her mother-in-law.

She remembered what Mr. Huang had said about avoiding suspicion, so she controlled her temper, obeyed her mother-in-law and treated her like her own mother.

After six months had passed, the whole household had changed. Li-Li had practiced controlling her temper so much that she found that she almost never got mad or upset. She had not had an argument with her mother-in-law in six months because she now seemed much kinder and easier to get along with.

The mother-in-law's attitude toward Li-Li changed, and she began to love Li-Li like her own daughter. She kept telling friends and relatives that Li-Li was the best daughter-in-law one could ever find. Li-Li and her mother-in-law were now treating each other like a real mother and daughter.

Li-Li's husband was very happy to see what was happening.

One day, Li-Li came to see Mr. Huang and asked for his help again.

She said, "Dear Mr. Huang, please help me to keep the poison from killing my mother-in-law! She's changed into such a nice woman, and I love her like my own mother. I do not want her to die because of the poison I gave her."

Mr. Huang smiled and nodded his head. "Li-Li, there's nothing to worry about. I never gave you any poison. The herbs I gave you were vitamins to improve her health. The only poison was in your mind and your attitude toward her, but that has been all washed away by the love which you gave to her."

HAVE YOU REALIZED that how you treat others is exactly how they will treat you?

There is a wise Chinese saying: "The person who loves others will also be loved in return." God might be trying to work in another person's life through you. Send this to your friends and spread the POWER OF LOVE.

Remember, nothing will happen if you don't. No one will die or fall sick. But... if you send it to others your may change their life. After all you have got nothing to lose but a lot to gain.

You know those chain emails that make the rounds? This is one of them. This is very touching story complete with the instruction at the end of the story. :)

Sally jumped as soon as she saw the Surgeon come out of the operating room.

She said: "How is my little boy? Is he going to be O.K.? When can I see him?"

The Surgeon said, "I'm sorry, we did all we could."

Sally said, "Why do little children get cancer, doesn't GOD care anymore? GOD, where were you when my son needed you?"

The Surgeon said, "One of the nurses will be out in a few minutes to let you spend time with your son's remains before it's transported to the university."

Sally asked that the nurse stay with her while she said Good-bye to her son.

Sally ran her fingers through his thick red curly hair.

The nurse asked, "Would you like a lock of his hair?"

Sally nodded yes. The nurse cut a lock of his hair and put it in a plastic bag and handed it to Sally.

Sally said, "It was Jimmy's idea to give his body to the University for study. He said, 'It might help somebody else,' and that is what he wanted. I
said, No at first, but Jimmy said, 'Mom I won't be using it after I die, maybe it will help some other little boy to be able to spend one more day with his mother'".

Sally said, "My Jimmy had a heart of gold, always thinking of someone else and always wanting to help others if he could."

Sally walked out of the Children's Hospital for the last time now after spending most of the last 6 months there. She sat the bag with Jimmy's things in it on the seat beside of her in the car. The drive home was hard and it was even harder to go into an empty house. She took the bag to Jimmy's room and started placing the model cars and things back in his room exactly where he always kept them She lay down across his bed and cried herself to sleep holding his pillow.

Sally woke up about midnight and lying beside her on the bed, was a letter folded up. She opened the letter, it said:

"Dear Mom: I know you're going to miss me, but don't think that I will ever forget you or stop loving you because I'm not around to say I LOVE YOU.

I'll think of you every day Mom and I'll love you even more each day. Someday we will see each other again. If you want to adopt a little boy so you won't be so lonely, he can have my room and my old stuff to play with. If you decide to get a girl instead, she probably wouldn't like the same
things as us boys do, so you will have to buy her dolls and stuff girls like.

Don't be sad when you think about me, this is really a great place.

Grandma and Grandpa met me as soon as I got here and showed me around some, but it will take a long time to see everything here.

The angels are so friendly; I love to watch them fly! Jesus doesn't look like any of the pictures I
saw of Him but I knew it was Him as soon as I saw Him. Jesus took me to see GOD!

And guess what Mom? I got to sit on GOD'S knee and talk to Him like I was somebody important. I told GOD that I wanted to write you a letter and tell
you Good-bye and everything, but I knew that wasn't allowed. God handed me some paper and His own personal pen to write you this letter with. I
think Gabriel is the name of the angel that is going to drop this letter off to you.

God said to give you the answer to one of the questions you asked Him about.

Where was He when I needed him? God said, "The same place He was when Jesus was on the cross. He was right there, as He always is with all His
children.

Oh, by the way Mom, nobody else can see what is written on this paper but you. To everyone else, it looks like a blank piece of paper. I have to give God His pen back now; he has some more names to write in the Book Of Life.

Tonight I get to sit at the table with Jesus for Supper. I'm sure the food will be great.

I almost forgot to let you know now I don't hurt anymore, the cancer is all gone. I'm glad because I couldn't stand that pain anymore and God couldn't
stand to see me suffer the pain either, so He sent The Angel of Mercy to get me. The Angel said I was Special Delivery!

Signed with love from:
God & Jesus & Me."

Well, the instructions at the end of the email go like this:

Take 60 seconds & give this a shot! Let's just see Satan stop this one.

All you do is . . .

1) Simply say a small prayer for a blessing for the person who sent you this.

2) Send this on to five other people. Within hours, you caused a multitude of people to pray to God for each other. Then sit back and watch the power of God work in your life for doing the thing that you know He love!

Interesting little facts about that mole growing on your body ...

Every mole has its significance, and can be interpreted, depending on whichever part of the body it is located.

1) A mole is on your chin says you are likely to be lucky, for it means health, wealth and happiness in the years to come, especially in middle life. Even if you started out poor, you could end up rich.

2) If you have a mole on your throat, this is a sign of great happiness in your love life, and denotes lots of lucky moments and contentment.

3) A mole on the back of your neck isn't quite so fortunate, and means that you must watch out for deceit from those around you.

4) If your mole is on your nose, you'll love travel and meeting new people. You're also an eloquent talker and can charm the birds off the
trees with your sweet talk.

5) A mole on your lip indicates a love of eating and drinking, and there could a touch of the glutton in your makeup. You'll also take to luxury
like a duck to water.

6) A mole on the right shoulder means good fortune and bring lots of family joy, but if your mole is on your left shoulder you'll have to fight a little for your happiness, and you could come up against a few difficulties in your love life.

7) On the left foot, a mole is a sign of prosperity, and comfort through life. On the right foot, you'll have to overcome some stumbling blocks
before you achieve your dreams.

8) If you have a mole on your left breast, you'll have many lovers, but if there's one on your right breast, it indicates hard work.

9) A mole on your lower jaw means children and happy family life, with security and love.

10) A mole on the eyebrow means an early engagement or marriage.

11) If your mole is on your wrist, you'll have an inquiring mind and a thirst for knowledge and you should go far in your chosen career.

12) If your mole appears on your right knee, you'll end up like the old woman in the shoe, with many, many children and always broke.

13) A mole on the right side of your forehead means you'll end up with lots of honours and a name for yourself. If it's on the left side, you'll have a patch of ill-luck now and then.

14) If your mole is on your stomach, you'll have a life free of ill-health and shouldn't have to worry about minor ailments.

15) A mole in the center of your back indicates a fiery temper and a touch of jealousy.

16) If your mole is on your thigh left or right you'll have to endure a few tears before you find happiness. And you'll have to work for your living.

17) If your mole is on either elbow, you could find yourself susceptible to flattery and this could bring trouble in your middle years, but joy
later.

18) A mole on or near the right ears means you love travel and movement. Dancing and action will be your way of expressing your personality and will
bring you success.

19) A mole on or near your left ear means you'll have a sympathetic nature and lots of patience, but you could be taken advantage of through life, as
you don't always stand up for yourself.

20) A mole on the right cheek means you have to watch your tongue. You may have a habit of giving away secrets and betraying a confidence because you
enjoy a good gossip.

21) A mole on the left cheek indicates you will be popular, You'll have lots of friends and your love life wil go smoothly because of your ability to adapt.

22) If your mole is large, you'll have an independent nature and enjoy doing your own thing, and even your friends and family won't be able to stop you from going off on your own now and then and exploring new grounds.

23) A mole that has hair growing out of it is a token of good luck.

So? Where's that mole?

Check out my other story at The Leaf

Direct more traffic to your website!

Dear wife:

I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you forever.

I've been a good man to you for 7 years and I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today and that was the last straw.

Last week, you came home and didn't even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers.

You ate in 2 minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don't tell me you love me anymore; you don't want sex or anything that connects us as husband and wife. Either you're cheating on me or you don't love me anymore; whatever the case, I'm gone.

Your EX-Husband

P.S. don't try to find me. Your SISTER and I are moving away to West Virginia together!

Have a great life!

==================================================

Dear Ex-Husband:

Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true you and I have been married for 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you've been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining and griping. Too bad that doesn't work. I DID notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the first thing that came to mind was 'You look just like a girl!' Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can't say something nice, I didn't comment.

And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago. About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, and I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning.

After all of this, I still loved you and felt we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job and bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope
you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won't get a dime from me. So take care.

Signed,
Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free!

P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl. I hope that's not a problem.